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Been offered a job, WIBU to turn it down and continue claiming benefits?

(112 Posts)
Stevenson100 Tue 27-Dec-16 03:48:23

Really struggling here. I am a single mum to 3 gorgeous boys - I've been in remission for a while now and could easily work. I do need the money and I want to prove to my boys that even if you get knocked down (cancer) you get back up again and build something for yourself. I have qualifications and used to be a chef for a really great hotel company.

I was offered a job role just before Christmas and I need to let them know by the new year, I'll have to cook live lobsters. I am so not keen on this. I don't have an issue cooking with meats, etc. but to be a part of the killing process? There is no way I'd be comfortable with that and I think that would cause a massive problem. WIBU to turn this job down because of that? I'd obviously be looking for other work and finding whatever comes up and going for it.

user1477282676 Tue 27-Dec-16 03:52:32

Won't it affect your benefits if you turn it down? Congratulations on remission by the way.x

WellErrr Tue 27-Dec-16 04:00:45

I was all ready to say 'of course YABU, a jobs a job,' but do you know what? I couldn't do that either. I think it's a horribly cruel thing to do.

So I think YANBU. Wait for something that doesn't compromise your morals.

And congratulations on your remission flowers

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface Tue 27-Dec-16 04:01:45

Cooking live lobsters is despicable behaviour.

Surely it's illegal now due to excessive cruelty?

I think you'd be okay to say no to the lobster torture and just do the legal parts of the job. It's fine to refuse to boil a living creature alive.

There will be other jobs. I think you should wait for something better.

From what you've said about yourself this job sounds beneath you.

Grindelwaldswand Tue 27-Dec-16 04:04:40

Talk to them and tell them its against your ethics to kill a live lobster but you'll be happy to do every other aspect of the job

Stevenson100 Tue 27-Dec-16 04:07:19

Thank you all fsmile

King - it's a seafood restaurant, seems to be very popular and well respected, so not sure if they would be doing something illegal? Maybe though.

sobeyondthehills Tue 27-Dec-16 04:34:16

You applied to a seafood restaurant? How do you feel about Oysters?


user1477282676 Tue 27-Dec-16 04:38:05

This is a new invention which stuns Lobsters so they die painlessly!

Motherfuckers Tue 27-Dec-16 04:44:28

Lobsters do not have a central nervous system, so it is likely they do not process pain in the same way. However boiling live lobster is not the preferred method (toughens the meat supposedly) as I chef I am sure you know how to kill a lobster humanely.

Stevenson100 Tue 27-Dec-16 04:54:48

Motherfuckers - chefs don't know how to cook every piece of food! I often am trained on certain foods through work. I don't really specialise in seafood and this would be the first. As much as I know how to cook, it's mainly about the knowledge you have on flavours and dishes, not about the process. In my work, I've always had to follow recipes given, unless it's a 'chef's special' and even then I have always had to go on a basic meal and just use the flavours I know about. I have certainly never been taught how to 'humanly kill a lobster'. It's just something I have never done.

Motherfuckers Tue 27-Dec-16 04:58:26

Why apply to a seafood restaurant?

Stevenson100 Tue 27-Dec-16 05:02:38

Because I fitted their criteria, I didn't need any experience in seafood? Why?

Motherfuckers Tue 27-Dec-16 05:04:02

Because lobster is likely to be on the menu.

steff13 Tue 27-Dec-16 05:05:25

You put it in the freezer to knock it out, then sever its central nervous system with a knife. It should die instantly. I'm not a chef, but that's how Alton Brown does it.

Why did you apply at a seafood restaurant if you're not comfortable with seafood?

StarryIllusion Tue 27-Dec-16 05:05:27

I'm pretty sure your benefits would stop if you turned down a job. Mine did and it was because the training it required me to attend would cost more than my first 3 months pay. Better to be honest at interview and say that you don't think you could do this aspect of the job and ask them not to offer it to you.

steff13 Tue 27-Dec-16 05:06:21

Ahh, xpost. But, really it was foreseeable that you'd have to cook lobster at a seafood restaurant.

PitilessYank Tue 27-Dec-16 05:10:19

How would the benefits office know if someone had turned down a job? Just curious.

I agree that you are not obligated to do anything that goes against your code of ethics just to get off of benefits.

I would also add that for your long-term benefit you should maybe try to find an optimal job for yourself, rather than just anything in your field. That way it will be easier to feel good about spending time away from your boys.

Good Health to you. flowers

sobeyondthehills Tue 27-Dec-16 05:49:03

The more I read the more unreasonable you are being. If you are willing to cook something like veal then you should be willing to cook lobster.

Liiinoo Tue 27-Dec-16 06:18:53

It seems a littlle illogical that you are prepared to cook something that someone else has killed but draw the line at killing it yourself. By that logic you could accept the job and just delegate the actual putting the lobster in water to someone else. Then they would be the killer and you could step in after they had done the deed and continue to prepare the dish.

WannaBe Tue 27-Dec-16 06:30:00

Yabu. As a chef you knew that applying to a seafood restaurant would involve lobster. If you didn't want the job then you shouldn't have applied.

Ifailed Tue 27-Dec-16 06:31:19

working in a seafood restaurant will involve cooking many creatures alive, what about all the shellfish?

PotteringAlong Tue 27-Dec-16 06:34:05

You can't apply to a seafood restaurant and then be aghast that you have to cook seafood.

Yes, YABU to turn it down.

MoreThanUs Tue 27-Dec-16 06:37:43

They were talking about a woman on radio 4's food programme the other day, who only ate meat she had killed herself. I think we as consumers are far too removed from where our food comes from. This could be a great opportunity to really engage with food.

daisychain01 Tue 27-Dec-16 06:44:37

sorry if this is a dumb question, but were you referred for this seafood restaurant job by Job Centre plus or did you just apply for the role through other means?

If the former, it may be difficult to start laying down restrictions about what type of work compromises your morals, although I'm sure they'd have to be bloody unreasonable and callous not to take on board that it's repulsive boiling live creatures to death.

If the latter, ie you found out about the job yourself just decline the role, and dont say anything, how will they know? Also, don't apply for that type of job anymore. Make sure if you don't want a job you withdraw from the process before you are accepted.

lovelearning Tue 27-Dec-16 06:46:18

I need to let them know by the new year

OP: Say "No, thank you."

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