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AIBU?

to not want my MIL to stay in our house without me?

78 replies

mummycarolyn · 10/11/2016 20:08

My MIL is coming from abroad (US) to stay with us next week. She doesn't fly alone, so she's meeting my OH when he's on a business trip, and flying back with him. This is the first time she's meeting DS, and she's staying with us. I'm flying back to the US early for the holidays to be with my family and taking DS with me (on the 10th) and my OH is following on the (22nd). She wants to stay with my OH after DS and I leave. I'm a bit weirded out by it and uncomfortable. Is that wrong? I'd rather she fly back with DS and I.

OP posts:
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Ohdearducks · 10/11/2016 20:09

She wants to spend time with her son alone. Yabu.

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PoldarksBreeches · 10/11/2016 20:10

Yes you're weird. What is your problem with it? She's your husband's mum!

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bibbitybobbityyhat · 10/11/2016 20:10

Can you make it more understandable?

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Elland · 10/11/2016 20:10

Sorry but YABVU!

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pinkbraces · 10/11/2016 20:11

That's a very strange reaction. You don't want your DH and his mum in the house without you?Hmm

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MissPatty · 10/11/2016 20:11

I'd much rather be out of the house if my MIL is in it

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Tinkerclare · 10/11/2016 20:12

Yes it's wrong and weird. You are flying off with your ds, she gets to spend some time with hers when you are not there. Sounds ideal

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Notonthestairs · 10/11/2016 20:12

So your MIL wants to spend time with her son and you are weirded out? Really?

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ConvincingLiar · 10/11/2016 20:12

Unless there's a back story, yabu. It's DH's house too.

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Winifredgoose · 10/11/2016 20:12

You are being unreasonable. Imagine you were on your own, while your husband was flying back, and he said he was weirded out by your mum staying on with you. If it was a female friend moving in to keep him company I could understand, but it is his mother. What is the problem?

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WhatHaveIFound · 10/11/2016 20:13

Sorry but YABU. She's your MIL. The worse she could do is tidy your house to death Grin

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HedgehogHedgehog · 10/11/2016 20:13

YABU i would agree if it were her alone in your house but its not shes with her son so i really dont see the problem? And im a pretty uptight person when it comes to inlaws.

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GinIsIn · 10/11/2016 20:13

You don't want your husband's mum to spend any time with him without you there?! Hmm YABVVVVU

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Allthebestnamesareused · 10/11/2016 20:14

Fast forward 30 years and your DIL doesn't want you yo spend time with your DS. Now ssk yourself the question! Hmm

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usual · 10/11/2016 20:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DartmoorDoughnut · 10/11/2016 20:14

YABU

I'm guessing you'll want to spend time by yourself with your DS when he's grown up?!

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Buddahbelly · 10/11/2016 20:15

Imagine your future DIL saying the same about you wanting to spend time with your son.

Not so weird now is it?

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sorenipples · 10/11/2016 20:15

Nothing wrong with being uncomfortable, but you would be unreasonable, IMO, to prevent (unless big back story). Maybe mention any specific concerns to your DH and take mitigating actions I.e. don't leave dirty laundry if you are worried about her going through it, make sure DH is aware what you consider an invasion of personal space.

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ladymariner · 10/11/2016 20:16

So you want to spend time with your son but you don't want your mil to spend time with hers.....do you seriously need to ask how unreasonable you are being???? Grow up!

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ChardonnayKnickertonSmythe · 10/11/2016 20:17

It's your DH's house as well not just yours.

Sorry, YABU.

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Marynary · 10/11/2016 20:19

It is weird to be "weirded out" by it. I really would keep your thoughts to yourself and not suggest to your DH that she can't stay.

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Mishegoss · 10/11/2016 20:22

Yeah you're being unreasonable..and weird! Would you not want your own mum to stay with you in your home if DH wasn't there? Or are you just weirded out by his mother wanting to spend time with him?
Sorry OP, get a grip!

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OccamsRaiser · 10/11/2016 20:22

I thought you were going to say she was alone in your house after you, DH and DS left. I might wobble on that. But she's staying with her DS to spend time with him and travel with him? YABU I'm afraid.

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BarbarianMum · 10/11/2016 20:23

Very wrong. Do you think you'll feel the same way about your ds when he's older?

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KC225 · 10/11/2016 20:23

Agree with the above that unless there is some huge back story, it's not unreasonable for your MIL and DH to spend time together.

I got so bored with picking out Mothers day plant and flowers which got a cursory sniff from my MIL. I finally said, give her what she really wants, book a table at the local nice restaurant just you and her and have a leisurely lunch. She loved it. Alone time with her boy.

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