DH (that is Dick Head) has gone away.
Train connections back were tight.
He knew this.
If connection not met them last bus back (into the sticks) would be missed.
He also knew this.
What a surprise. Things have not gone to plan.
And the stupid fuckwitted bastard hasn't taken a key.
- I am not picking up. Today is my day off. (He knew this as well)
- I am not leaving my front door unlocked all nihght in case the twat makes it home.
This also happens pretty much every time he goes away. Nob.