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AIBU?

How do you feel about your third child?

107 replies

SauvignonZonk · 11/06/2016 21:28

Did they complete your family or send it into chaos?!

Also I'm 36 (almost) 37 and dh is 42, honestly and no need to be pc would you raise an eyebrow at our ages?

I just see our house with 3 dc and I know for sure I'll be done then!

Dh not opposed but life is very easy at the minute.

Dc 1 and 3 if that's relevant!

OP posts:
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7to25 · 11/06/2016 21:32

He did not complete it......another three followed and I would be hypocritical to raise an eyebrow. I am 57 and my youngest is 12

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CuntingDMjournos · 11/06/2016 21:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DramaAlpaca · 11/06/2016 21:36

He completed our family. I knew after having DC2 that I'd want another child, and DC3 finished the family off nicely. He just fitted in, but I won't deny that having three under 5 was hard work. Worth it though.

I wouldn't raise an eyebrow at your ages. Not at all.

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SovietKitsch · 11/06/2016 21:37

She's the light of my life! In fact, I think we'd all say that. She's doesn't sleep and she knows how to strop, but I'm sooo glad we had her. We might just go for no.4 now too...

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TeacherABC · 11/06/2016 21:38

Third uses up any reserves you may have but I absolutely adore her and she completes our family perfectly Smile

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Waltermittythesequel · 11/06/2016 21:39

I felt done when I had him.

Yes it was chaotic and more different than I expected it to be after the other two.

But he is a character through and through and he is the petted so much by the other two!

I would say you won't regret the child you have in these circumstances!!!

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jellycat1 · 11/06/2016 21:39

I raise an eyebrow at 'life is very easy at the moment' with DCs being1 and 3!! Tell me your secret!! I have DSs under 2! Oh and I'm 40 so i think your age is the least relevant factor. :)

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minifingerz · 11/06/2016 21:40

He's a wonderful child and has a unique personality.

He has Aspergers and can be very difficult and volatile. I was 39 when I had him, and I wonder if this contributed to his developmental problems.

I wouldn't be without him!

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jellycat1 · 11/06/2016 21:41

Sorry meant to say I have 2 under 2. (That's probably why I can't type!)

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tilder · 11/06/2016 21:42

Love all of them but three has completed our family.

Each child you add changes the dynamic. I love having three. It's slightly more chaotic, getting everyone where they need to be takes planning and lift shares.

They are brilliant together. You will always be older by the time number three comes along!

Yes to the extra cost. Bigger car and bigger house. Childcare care costs rocketed and it's only now (after ten years) that we pay less than £350 a month.

You are also limited by your youngest in some ways. Such as buggy, naps, meals etc. The older ones benefits immeasurably though.

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Kerberos · 11/06/2016 21:42

My DC3 causes chaos but he's awesome. 6 years old and utterly fab.

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Aworldofmyown · 11/06/2016 21:43

I love the way my eldest two look after the youngest, they adore him in the strongest possible way. (and he adores them) I have quite a age gap though - not sure if that makes a difference.

He definitely completed the family.

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hazeyjane · 11/06/2016 21:43

We had Ds (our 3rd) when I was 41 and dd1 and 2 were 3 and 4.

I would be lying if I said that it didn't throw our lives into chaos, especially as Ds is disabled and I had a bit of breakdown when he was a baby (partly because of fears over his health and development, partly because I just felt I couldn't cope and partly because his birth was very traumatic)

However

I have an incredible dh, and 2 amazing dds and Ds astounds us all every day. He is 6 now (well nearly) and his sisters are 9and 10 and they squabble and cuddle and screech and laugh. I have come off the anti depressants that got me through a very tough time and am working and at college. It has been hard work, but I feel overwhelmingly lucky to have the 3 of them, and I feel they are incredibly lucky to have each other.

Good luck whatever you decide Flowers

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needacar · 11/06/2016 21:44

She is the light of my life. Couldn't imagine a day without her Smile

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TheNIghtManagersWife · 11/06/2016 21:45

Dd3 definitely threw my life into chaos but she is utterly amazing and completed my family perfectly. She is now 3 years old she is luckily a perfect sleeper but a little madam in other ways. I adore her. I left her dad/my husband a year ago and I am so so glad I had number 3 before I left. I always wanted a third, I felt it in my bones and would have been distraught to leave a marriage without completing my family.

I was 38 when she was born. H was 39. Our older two were 4 and 2 at the time. So I wouldn't raise an eyebrow to your ages either.

It is chaotic but so so worth it. 😊😊

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TheNIghtManagersWife · 11/06/2016 21:48

The only issue with being older was that I had to have an amnio as I was flagged as being high risk for downs baby based on blood tests. I was also marked as an older mother which meant more monitoring generally. Just something to be aware of as it was quite scary to begin with. Once I realised they were just being hypervigilant because of my age it was fine 😊

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Tiggeryoubastard · 11/06/2016 21:49

I'm totally in awe of mine. He's fantastic. He is exasperating and drives me mad. I'm utterly in love with him. I feel the same as I do with the older two (all now in their 20's). Yes, even though he wasn't planned, he was meant to be. He finished off the family perfectly. Is a great son, brother, brother in law and uncle. Can't imagine only having two. The dynamics between them all are brilliant. Oh, did I mention that he also drives me mad (more than once)?

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Onlymydogunderstandsme · 11/06/2016 21:50

I was just coming on here to ask the same question! We have 2 DC already aged 4 and 21 months. I kind of thought I was done after the second although I didn't have a definate feeling like some say they do. Just recently all I can think about is having another baby and I can really picture it.
We currently have a boy and a girl so everyone kind of assumes we don't want another which annoys me as it's about the amount of children you want not the sex. I just can't decide as one day I think it's really what I want and the next it seems silly to disrupt everything but I'm so broody!
Sorry to not actually answer your question! I think 1-2 seemed natural to me a 3rd seems to take a lot more thought.

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prettywhiteguitar · 11/06/2016 21:50

He is hilarious, beautiful and adored by everyone ! Worst sleeper, worst pregnancy and worst labour (went into shock) but would go through it all again for the little darling

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sweetkitty · 11/06/2016 21:51

She is an utter joy and a complete Angel. She made us want number four then our family was complete.

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prettywhiteguitar · 11/06/2016 21:51

House is a total shit tip too !

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Claireshh · 11/06/2016 21:53

We have a seven and five year old. I've had two miscarriages in the last year and a half. I turned 40 last month. I sort of gave up and we got a puppy instead. I am sad we didn't give a baby one last go. Actually I think a baby would have been easier than a puppy!

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ghostyslovesheep · 11/06/2016 21:54

I was 38 and Ex was 42

I would not be without her for a moment - she is a diva, a total monster, she makes life difficult she get in between her sisters bond (with two I think they would get on - 3 makes them all fight!) it cost more to go on holiday, she meant we (I) had to move house and I will be honest in saying it was a factor in our break up (he would only ever take 2 out - not 3 and I was exhausted - but he also had another affair so not all her!)

I wouldn't change a thing - she is whirlwind

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ballstoit · 11/06/2016 21:55

Best accident I've ever had Grin

Ex-H left while I was pg with her and the first year with 3 under 4 was bloody hard work but she's 7 next week, life has settled down and she is the final piece in my jigsaw (sorry for being barf worthy). I think number 3s benefits from parents being more relaxed and confident and are often 'characters' as a result.

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SchnitzelVonKrumm · 11/06/2016 21:55

He is tremendous. I'd have liked DC4 but it didn't happen. And you're not too old.

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