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Who is BU - me or DP? (boring tradesman question)

(18 Posts)
cariadlet Thu 06-Aug-15 09:32:49

We are redecorating dd's bedroom. Have taken up the old carpet and she would like floorboards and rugs. Old floorboards are in a state so we'll need to get them professionally sanded, filled and varnished.

We had somebody come and look at them first thing on Tuesday. He gave me a rough estimate of the cost and said that he would email me a proper estimate, but - crucially - didn't say when. I assumed he'd do it Tuesday evening, but if not then Wednesday. It's now Thursday morning.

DP's attitude is sod him, he can't want the work and if he can't be relied on to get us an estimate then he can't be relied on to do the work. He thinks we should either look for someone else or he could put down laminate flooring himself.

My attitude is that it's annoying that we haven't heard back, but that DP is cutting his nose off to spite his face (he's got form for doing this). If we tried somebody else we could have the same problem and at least this we had this man's number given to us by a neighbour - we saw what he had done with the floorboards at their house and it was a really good job.

I'm appealing to the MN Jury. Who is BU here?

PresidentTwonk Thu 06-Aug-15 09:36:34

No one is BU just differing opinions, I would wait 72 hours then contact him and explain your husband has looked at some other options but you'd like his quote before deciding and can he let you know when it'll be and explain to OH you know it's annoying he's taking so long but DD really wants her flooring like that and you'd like to wait for his quote but you will chase it up to try and hurry him along.

misskatamari Thu 06-Aug-15 09:37:51

I can see where your dh is coming from but if you know this guy does good work and he's been recommended then I would probably give him a call and chase the quote myself.

LurkingHusband Thu 06-Aug-15 09:39:06

Sounds 50:50 to me.

Ordinarily I've very little patience with tradespeople, for various reasons, and a late (i.e. later than they said) response is a red flag.

However, a personally recommended tradesman - in particular one whose work you have seen - is like the proverbial rocking horse shit, set in a ring of unicorn farts - and one I would try very hard to keep onside.

It's a shame it's an assumption at the heart of this. You know what they say about "assume" ?

pinkje Thu 06-Aug-15 09:40:33

It may be taking him longer to price up materials if he's waiting on someone else getting back to him so I'd say stick with this guy but a text message to him to confirm your email would be a wee nudge.

Are you sure the quote is not in your spam folder?

cariadlet Thu 06-Aug-15 09:50:20

The quote definitely isn't in my spam folder - I've checked it a few times.

DP is now saying that I told him the tradesman said he would email us the quote on Tuesday evening. I'm pretty sure that I didn't say that - only that I thought he would. But we both know that I've got a really bad memory, so DP is now throwing that back at me plus saying that I'm just changing what I told him cos I want to email the guy.
We're both getting a bit narky with each other. DP would be really grumpy if he caught me on this thread.

Why isn't anything ever simple?

OTheHugeManatee Thu 06-Aug-15 09:54:09

I would text or call to give him a nudge if you like him and want him to do the work. But also I would never just get one supplier in to quote, always two or three unless you know and trust them.

TheWernethWife Thu 06-Aug-15 09:57:16

Why is your DP grumpy and why are you putting up with it. You have as much say in what happens in your house as he has, don't be such a bloody doormat. The guy may have other jobs on, I waited six weeks for a decorator to start recently - he came highly recommended and was booked up. Did a fabulous job, well worth the wait.

ElementaryMyDearWatson Thu 06-Aug-15 10:13:46

He may have been ill or had a family crisis. I would suggest at the very least sending him a nudge.

MaxPepsi Thu 06-Aug-15 10:44:52

I'd wait a few more days for the quote, then chase.

Don't get laminate flooring. It's shit. Really shit.

nancy75 Thu 06-Aug-15 10:51:28

Why the big drama, just email the bloke, you don't need your partners permission to send an email.
Say something like you came on Tuesday, we are very keen to get a price please let me know by tomorrow lunchtime

DJThreeDog Thu 06-Aug-15 10:52:28

Tell him to wind his neck in, in the grand scheme of things it's not that important, and that you'll contact the tradesman to chase him up for the quote.

'Why are you being such a twat?' would probably be uttered in this house.

And it is simple! He's getting his knickers in a knot about such a nothing event! Yes, irritating you've not yet had the quote but this is par for the course with tradesman tbh, is something stopping him from making a phone call rather than throwing his weight around about how he'll go and buy then fit some laminate?!

(Sorry I'm particularly annoyed this morning and Will Take No Shit)

cariadlet Thu 06-Aug-15 13:04:18

is something stopping him from making a phone call

Yes - me. I've told DP not to ring the tradesman cos I can imagine him getting angry on the phone. I'd rather phone/text/email myself.
If we don't hear today I'll probably just get in touch tomorrow - when DP is back at work so we don't squabble over it.

LurkingHusband Thu 06-Aug-15 14:13:15

Just to add, we've had a few visits, measurements, promises of quotes and then nothing, so it's not an unusual situation. Not for small jobs either. Last one (some block paving) 3 had 3 companies visit. Only one actually got back with the promised quote - £5,000. So presumably, the other two weren't so interested in a small job ?

MaxieMouse Thu 06-Aug-15 14:18:58

Make sure you also ask him when he will be able to start the job, otherwise you'll have another argument with your DH when the guy doesn't start the day after you accept the quote.

mynewpassion Thu 06-Aug-15 14:50:55

Send him a quick email.

Does your daughter or you have a time line of when you want the room completely finish or do you have infinite patience?

hellsbellsmelons Thu 06-Aug-15 14:57:22

My OH is self employed and has many things on the go at any one time.
He does 'forget' about some things.
It will hit him one night that he hasn't sent a quote so off he'll go and get it done, but it can be days and days sometimes.
It may of just slipped his mind.
Send him a text to remind him and ask when you might have said email quote.
You are both making a huge deal out of something that is not worthy.
Text him now!

SheSparkles Thu 06-Aug-15 14:59:51

We've been getting a lot of work done on the house this year and have spent a fair bit of time waiting for quotes. What I've discovered is that a lot of good tradesmen seem to have a particular time each week set aside when they do all their quotes, and I now don't query anything inside a week.
Your DH sounds much the same as mine, but the line I take is that we do it my way, as I'm the one at home during the day, so I'm the one who ends up dealing with the guys in the job.
At this stage, I'd maybe text him along the lines of "have you managed to get a price for our job?"

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