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to ask to borrow friends ornaments even though she's not invited to wedding??

(79 Posts)
robinlovesfatman Sun 17-May-15 19:56:35

Just that really. Am having small wedding, just family. Friend has few pieces that would fit in with wedding theme. We both are usually generous with each other. Would this be really cheeky?

PS they are bathroom ornaments for beach theme.

Theycallmemellowjello Sun 17-May-15 19:58:18

Yes it would be rude.

wheresthelight Sun 17-May-15 19:59:28

sorry but I think ot would be quite cheeky but I guess it depends on what sort of friendship you have

robinlovesfatman Sun 17-May-15 19:59:33

Thats what I feared

ChucksAhoy Sun 17-May-15 19:59:40

Yes! Your poor friend - to be close enough to borrow her ornaments but not close enough to attend your wedding? confused

nickersinaknot Sun 17-May-15 19:59:44

Yes. Rude and a cringey. A beach theme ?!?

Springintosummer Sun 17-May-15 20:00:06

Only you know what your relationship is like. I would say YANBU to ask and I think you think you are too otherwise you would not have asked.

Next time you see her I would say some thing like where did you get those ornaments from? or I am on the look out for some ornaments like the ones in your bathroom for my wedding, if you see any please let me know. This gives her the option to offer them to you.

GERTI Sun 17-May-15 20:00:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SaucyJack Sun 17-May-15 20:00:47

If it really is just family invited, them I reckon it's fine to ask if she's the sensible type.

No different to a family party I guess.

MyCatIsAGit Sun 17-May-15 20:00:49

Don't do it. I asked someone for a hairdresser recommendation before my wedding but didn't invite her, she's never talked to me again...

Laquitar Sun 17-May-15 20:00:56

If it is just family it is fine. I would be happy to give you the stuff if i was your friend.

If you have invited other friends but not her then it would be rude.

Theycallmemellowjello Sun 17-May-15 20:01:20

I like springintosummer's idea! But don't be too obvious...

londonrach Sun 17-May-15 20:02:40

Will go against the grain here but saying ask but explain you only asking just family. Explain shes welcome to say no and be prepared to replace items if taken..

Pagwatch Sun 17-May-15 20:02:55

Yes rude.

Unless you are prepared to stress the bloodline of all your guest and absolutely have not invited anyone to whine you are not related - which would be quite unusual I think?

ThroughThickAndThin01 Sun 17-May-15 20:04:26

Yes. Very rude. Why would you think it wasn't?

PurpleSwift Sun 17-May-15 20:04:26

Cheeky! Sorry! I'd say if she was a close enough friend she'd understand but then I'd assume she's be close enough to invite too. Could you hint? Explain it's a family only wedding and you're wanting a beach theme and need to sort some ornaments etc and she may offer?

robinlovesfatman Sun 17-May-15 20:16:48

Thanks guys! I wont ask!

JoanHickson Sun 17-May-15 20:18:21

Thank goodness.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Sun 17-May-15 20:20:32

I've been around long enough to come across people with a brass neck but you really do take the golden Oscar for it.
Have you heard yourself and what you sound like, a right liberty taker.
You hAve the cheek to call this women your friend yet you think it's okay to leAve her out of your wedding. That's assuming she actually gives a shit and would even be remotely interested in going!
And you're wanting to ask to loan her property.
I mean what would you say, sorry you're not part of he clique this time, everyone's (well all our friends) are invited to wedding aside from you but do you mind helping us out anyway.
I know what I'd say to you, and it would not be pleAsant

Coldcabbagestew Sun 17-May-15 20:22:03

If your wedding is really only family I don't see the problem - though the earlier post about asking where she bought them could work.

MammaTJ Sun 17-May-15 20:25:54

Why don't you go the whole hog and send a save the date then ask her to decorate, rather than invite her, a la Tidy Dancer!

Tidy Dancer has the most fucked up family and friends in the history of family and friends, so do not take this advice seriously!

Do not do this, it would be rude. Actually not just rude, but rude and grabby!


quietasamouse Sun 17-May-15 20:25:55

Too much of a risk I think. She is probably a bit miffed at not being invited. Even though you've said it's just family, it's still a rejection.

catchingzzzeds Sun 17-May-15 20:28:55

I don't think it would be rude to ask if you're good friends! I wouldn't mind at all and be happy to help.

CelibacyCakeAndFuckThePO Sun 17-May-15 20:30:22

Over reaction much, lighthouse shock

Hang you have tasteful bathroom ornaments and a friend about to get married?

Bearbehind Sun 17-May-15 20:30:50

It never ceases to amaze me that people even consider things like this.

You've chosen not to vote a close friend to celebrate the biggest day of your life but you feel it's appropriate to tap her up for her knick knacks.

Really hmm

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