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AIBU?

To think this builder is starting to border on harrassment

63 replies

listsandbudgets · 11/02/2015 22:14

I got some quotes for a job in November. It was a big job (about £22,000) so I got four quotes, went with one of them after taking references and emailed the other 3 to say that I'd decided to use another builder on this occassion.

Since then one of the builders has been phoning me at least once a week and often twice. His quote was £10k higher than the next lowest (which we went with the other 2 were a bit lower but I didn't like the builders.). I told him several times that we had given the job to someone else but he still keeps phoning and emailing. I've been dropping his phone calls to voice mail and ignoring his emails for the last couple of weeks but quite honestly I've had enough and am close to accusing him of harassment. He phoned again today and left a message to say that he wasn't happy with my decision and thought I'd gone with a second rate building firm just to save money and the job would be badly done. He sounded almost threatening to be honest.

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listsandbudgets · 11/02/2015 22:15

If it makes any difference its a project I'm managing for my employer not my own home.

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InfinitySeven · 11/02/2015 22:20

Is he telling you what he wants?

I'd send him a letter, recorded, and state that you have made your decision and any further contact in any form will be considered harassment and reported accordingly.

I'd also see if you can block his number, and add his email address to your spam filter.

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LMGTFY · 11/02/2015 22:23

It may be worth sending a response to his next email to the effect of 'further to your emails and phone calls, I appreciate your concern however my decision over the builder is final. Please do not contact me by email, telephone, letter or any other method on this matter again'.

If he does after that then you have a solid proof you have asked him to stop and can report him for harrassment.

Sounds like a complete knob and you made the right choice!

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listsandbudgets · 11/02/2015 22:29

As far as I can tell he wants the job. Over time he's said his quote was perfectly reasonable and I wouldn't get the job done any cheaper. I told him the other quotes were £22k, £21200 and £20800 and his was £32k. He still refused to accept that I should have given the job to anyone else!

I talked to my employer this morning and his view was that if I had one more call he'd instruct our solicitor to send what he called a "fuck off" letter!

Off to find out how to block his number although he sometimes comes through on a private number so that makes it harder.

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BorisBaby · 11/02/2015 22:37

We are having our house rewired got three quotes and the person who quoted the most 3.5k has harassed DH nonstop for weeks now and has dropped his price to 1.7K the person we are using is charging us 1.8k!

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DeliciousMonster · 11/02/2015 22:41

Let him make the call, and then get the fuck off letter sent.

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Tobyjugg · 11/02/2015 22:46

My employer had similar trouble with a printing firm. We sent a "fuck off" letter and said we would not be considering them for any future work either.

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StillStayingClassySanDiego · 11/02/2015 22:48

He's being an arse.

Dh is a tradesman and if a quote wasn't followed up by confirmation of the written estimate he offered we moved on assuming it wasn't in their price.

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listsandbudgets · 11/02/2015 23:14

Sorry you're haviing the same problems Borisbaby. Some people seem to have very thick skins really.

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SolidGoldBrass · 11/02/2015 23:24

Yes, send him a letter or an email telling him to stop contacting you, and if he doesn't fuck off, involve the police. It is harassment.

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EnriqueTheRingBearingLizard · 11/02/2015 23:34

I wouldn't reply to voicemail and if he caught me out on a live phone call or heemailed I'd repeatedly respond

Thank you for your tender, unfortunately in this event you were unsuccessful. The contract has been awarded, the decision is out of my hands and the matter has been concluded.

Log all contact and pass to your boss to deal with further if required.

You need to see it as water off a duck's back rather than as something that you have to let rile you.

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morethanpotatoprints · 11/02/2015 23:41

I wouldn't engage with him at all and certainly wouldn't discuss how much I was paying the other builder.
You made your decision end of matter, just don't engage with him.

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Sazzle41 · 12/02/2015 07:15

Don't engage with him, people who dont understand boundaries and norms of behaviour interpret that as encouragement and negotiation so accelerate or try harder thinking they can wear you down to a yes. Get the fuck off letter sent then ignore any calls (just disconnect but log any calls off him: and pass future emails to your employers legal bods with log and timeline of contact.

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Aeroflotgirl · 12/02/2015 08:19

Totally unacceptable, block his number. And don't be afraid to seek legal advice if he still carries on. He is totally wrong, we had a loft conversion last year, and accepted somebody who was 10k lower than somebody else. They did a fanrastic job, and have a very good reputation.

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wobblebobblehat · 12/02/2015 08:29

Ignore.

Block his number and set up a filter on your email.

I had a contact on Linkedin who I knew through a previous company. We met for coffee then he wouldn't leave me alone. I tried different tactics but the only one that worked was blocking him and ignoring.

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Dogsmom · 12/02/2015 09:03

Maybe that's how he's got himself a few jobs by pestering people.
You've made me nervous now as we've recently had 4 quotes for a dormer loft extension 3 of which were around 19k and 1 that was 31k not including plumbing or electrics.
I was going to let the unsuccessful ones know out of courtesy.

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JudgeRinderSays · 12/02/2015 09:05

tell him the job has been completed now.

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londonrach · 12/02/2015 09:06

Even if he was the best bidder i wouldnt have he anywhere near. One letter back saying the job has been offered to another firm any further contact is unappreciated and will be dealt with. If he contacts again report him to the police.

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Aeroflotgirl · 12/02/2015 09:37

Dogsmum our dormer loft conversion cost about 40k but with a new boiler and tank which ramped up the cost. We had another company quote 51k

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ptumbi · 12/02/2015 10:02

I know what you mean about 'not liking' the other builders - I've managed loads of building works and have regularly come across those who talk down to me/don't talk to me but to whichever 'man' is with me/think they can blind me with science or that I don't know what I'm talking about. They are the ones who think they can bump up the price by leaving stuff off the estimate (plumbing/elecs/doors ) Go with your gut, I reckon.

I agree that talking about the others' estimates was not on.

Hope the aggro get sorted soon

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GoEasyPudding · 12/02/2015 10:06

This happened to us with a tree surgeon but stopped sooner. He also sat in his van outside our house for a bit. Very, very strange.

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listsandbudgets · 12/02/2015 10:44

He just emailed again. Apparantly he's been to the property and discovered I'm using other builders. He's telling me that they have a reputation as con men, will cheat me out of thousands of pounds and I will seriously regret using them!! (They had excellent references, I viewed 3 jobs they'd done complete with delighted property owners and so far they're doing a great job for us)

I've sent him Enrique's email with the additional :. "We will instruct our solicitors to commence proceedings against you if you contact us regarding this matter again. I will also forward your email to our chosen contractors as they may wish to commence procedures for libel"

I've copied in my boss.

He wasn't just phoning during working hours but sometimes as late as 10pm.

Lets hope that's enough to make him go away. I was actually very pleased when his quote came in so high as he seemed slightly odd bonkers when I met him. He kept racing about taking photos, ignoring me and blatently not listening to what we needed. I told him our budget and his first comment was "ok we'll add 10k to that" Looks like my first instinct was right.

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SolidGoldBrass · 12/02/2015 16:07

Well done. His behaviour is completely unacceptable and you and your boss did nothing wrong whatsoever.

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Number3cometome · 12/02/2015 16:17

.
Not sure how that full stop got there.

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Aeroflotgirl · 12/02/2015 16:27

Oh my god, good on you. Hopefully this will do the trick.

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