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AIBU?

to give up a secure council tenancy..................................

61 replies

SlowlyWakingUp · 27/03/2013 14:32

We were 'given' a 3 bed 2nd floor (no lift) flat a year ago after spending 2 years stuck in temporary housing (a 3 bed house).

We did not want the flat (got massively flamed on here) but were told we would have to take it or we would be evicted from the temporary house. We have 4 DCs, one a toddler and yes I was pregnant BEFORE getting into this position, and this has really been the hardest time of my life as we have no garden for the DCs to play or to dry washing, have to lug kids, bags and stuff up and down 2 flights of stairs etc. It has meant that the mental health issues that I have had caused by the circumstances of us being homeless in the first place, have been exacerbated and prolonged.

We had to wait a year for the tenancy to become secure and now we can request a transfer. Only I have been told that we will have to wait 3/4 years for a house.

We can try to swop but what family would realistically move from a house to a grotty 2nd floor flat?

I really can't face the thought of another summer stuck inside (there seems to be a constant police presence here and the DCs have been called 'cunts' etc on the few times they went out to play alone) and the neighbours swear up to the ceiling about the noise the DCs make, nothing excessive just normal kids noise but also have noisy parties and massive rows in the street so I am constantly on alert and trying to keep the DCs quiet which is stressful in itself.

I really feel that we no option but to try to privately rent again to get out of here even though the cost is prohibitive and we were 'moved on' from 3 privately rented houses in 3 years before we became homeless and after we lost our OWN home and the insecurity was a nightmare and that is my biggest problem with doing it again.

I just cannot do this for another 3 years! I am so envious of people who live in houses and can't get my head round that as I always lived in one until now and never even thought about it. AIBU???

OP posts:

Report

HeySoulSister · 27/03/2013 14:35

Yabu!! Try home swapper!! Just give it a go.... People might need to be where you are... You never know

I remember your original thread and the flaming

wannabeEostregoddess · 27/03/2013 14:38

YANBU at all. Try to swap first though.

I hate that you feel the need to justify yourself on here :(

x2boys · 27/03/2013 14:40

I dont live in a house either i live in a much too small flat with two boys difference is i own mine [bought before i got married and had kids] i dont have an option t oswap at least you have a roof over your head!

CloudsAndTrees · 27/03/2013 14:42

YANBU to give up your secure council tenancy if you can find somewhere else you want to live instead. It's your choice

goodygumdrops · 27/03/2013 14:43

If you have the option to privately rent you should. The council tenancy should be for people who have no other option.

SlowlyWakingUp · 27/03/2013 14:43

at least you have a roof over your head! Do you what? Nah not worth it.

OP posts:

expatinscotland · 27/03/2013 14:45

If being homeless was that bad for you mentally, then you need to try home swapping, because the private rental market has become more competitive and if you are still on benefits it is likely you will end up homeless again or will struggle to get a privately-rented house.

expatinscotland · 27/03/2013 14:46

If you can accept you may become homeless again and do another stint in temp accommodation, then you can go for it if you can find a private rental.

NettoSuperstar · 27/03/2013 14:48

It's a hard one, where you are sounds awful but I'd be really reluctant to give up the seure tenancy.
I had to fight and I risked a lot to get into HA and would never private rent again, though luckily I have a great flat.

Tough decision either way.

Twentytotwo · 27/03/2013 14:49

Please try to swap before giving up your lease. I know that things must seem really bleak at the moment, but don't give up hope. You might not find a house, but even another flat in a nicer area would be better wouldn't it? With a lift for getting up and down and some green space nearby?

It might be worth talking to your doctor about the impact living in this place has on your mental health. It could be that a letter might help you to get a transfer to somewhere more suitable.

NettoSuperstar · 27/03/2013 14:49

Sorry, that was no help at all!

FWIW my friend is currently considering swapping from a three bed house with garden to first floor flat, she has four kids, but wants to be in town which the flat is.

She's not sure yet, I want her to move because it's the block next to mine!

expatinscotland · 27/03/2013 14:54

'It might be worth talking to your doctor about the impact living in this place has on your mental health. It could be that a letter might help you to get a transfer to somewhere more suitable. '

Realistically, in many councils, this won't count for much if the OP is already housed because there is that much problem with homelessness and lack of 3bed+ properties, which she will need if she has 4 DCs.

I would try to swap, really.

JazzAnnNonMouse · 27/03/2013 15:02

Don't forget it's not always a straight forward swap e.g my nan moved into a ground floor retirement flat and so her 3 bed house was free which meant that someone who had a two bed flat could move which then meant that someone who was in a one bed could move which meant that someone who was in temporary could move etc etc

Don't give up your secure tenancy!!

auforfoulkesake · 27/03/2013 15:04

can't your council house you in a privately rented house?

JollyYellowGiant · 27/03/2013 15:07

With the bedroom tax lots of people will be downsizing so you are much more likely to get a mutual exchange than you think

expatinscotland · 27/03/2013 15:37

'With the bedroom tax lots of people will be downsizing so you are much more likely to get a mutual exchange than you think'

Haahaa! To where? Since there are so many council properties available and so many private landlords who can or will take HB? And she's in a 3bed, who is going to 'downsize' to that? Most who need to downsize are in need of 2 or 1 bed places.

There are 4 families affected by this 'tax' in our building. NONE is leaving. There's nowhere suitable to go besides total dives. No, thanks.

Try for a swap, but don't expect masses of people shifting because of the bedroom tax unless you are in a 1 or 2 bed and need another bedroom.

Here is warning enough if you are in receipt of any HB/LHA and looking to private let: lettingonhousingbenefit

expatinscotland · 27/03/2013 15:40

'can't your council house you in a privately rented house?'

No. Why would they? They house people temporarily in private homes/B&Bs/lodging. But they do not stump up for private rented homes for people; they pay out the appropriate LHA if and when you apply for it and can sometimes provide a list of LLs who will take LHA. But that's about it. Once you are considered permanently housed, it's up to you to change it if you can excepting some cases in which the council are trying to get the tenant to downsize, but in those cases they offer another council property.

charlearose · 27/03/2013 15:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thekidsrule · 27/03/2013 15:46

i remember that thread op

was hoping things were gonna work out

anyway i personally would not give p a council property,but have to admit dosent sound like a great area either

GoatsHaveStrangeEyes · 27/03/2013 15:51

YANBU

We did just that -they I had to for my sanity and my marriage. Living in a tiny two bed 2nd floor flat with two children and one on the way was just impossible. I spent all day everyday staring at the same for walls and my children couldn't see out of the windows let alone play outside.

We moved to a private rented 3 bed house with a big garden and it changed my life. Yes it cost more but it was so worth it.

We are now in the process of buying an even better house so it can work.

GoatsHaveStrangeEyes · 27/03/2013 15:52

Oh and we were on home swapper for two years and were facing a 3-4 year wait for a bigger house.

vivizone · 27/03/2013 16:01

Whereabouts are you? if in London, you will be able to swap quite easily. Do you mind moving to a flat but in a better area?

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havingamadmoment · 27/03/2013 16:06

YANBU if the flat does not fit your families needs then the best thing to do is to try and find somewhere else. Obviously as long as you can afford it and also can afford the instability of private rental (i.e will not end up homeless if told to move on after 6 months).. I see no reason to stay in a sub standard home if you have the ability to go elsewhere.

FrenchJunebug · 27/03/2013 16:08

YABVU I live in a one-bed housing association with a toddler and am on a waiting list for a bigger one which could take year and no garden BUT I realise I am very lucky to have a cheap secure tenancy in an nice area I couldn't otherwise afford.

It might seem hard at the moment but think of it long term and how lucky you are. Also try homeswap and going to the same size flat but with a garden as it would give your kids an outdoor space.

Finally you might have the same problem regarding noise and neighbours in a privately owned flat but without the security of a secure tenancy.

auforfoulkesake · 27/03/2013 16:10

you do what you think is best for your sanity. and your family's happiness.

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