She is 86, diagnosed with Alzheimer's 3 years ago but has been living alone with carers going in twice a day. Her short term memory has been bad, repeating herself within seconds and in the last few months her house has become dirty and also she hasn't been washing, also lost things like bank card, keys. I've helped out as much as possible. She was independent still, going to local shops and having lunch out every day.
Just over a week ago I had a phone call at midnight from one of mums neighbours. Mum had been going up and down the road in her nightie, hammering on doors looking for dad who died 20 years ago. She has been in hospital since then. Urine or blood infections were suspected which would explain the dramatic decline but tests were fine. The OT and a social worker have assessed mum and believe it is in her best interests to now go into a care home. My brother agrees but I can't get my head around the fact that mum will never go back to her little bungalow and will basically be locked up in a home, unable to potter down to the shops or get lunch out unless me or my brother take her. Completely taking away her independence. I think one more chance in her own home but brother is saying now is the time with the help of these people in hospital and says it will be harder to do it if she goes home and wanders again.
I just feel so sad about it all. She talks about going home but talks about the home she grew up in, not the bungalow she has spent the last 20 years in.
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AIBU?
To want mum to have one more chance at living alone before putting her in a home?
56 replies
sandyballs · 01/09/2012 08:29
OP posts:
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