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AIBU?

To consider straightening my four year old daughter's hair?

25 replies

Melindaaa · 20/10/2011 12:03

My daughter has awful, ratty, knotty hair. It's trimmed regularly and is just below shoulder length. Hair brushing is an absolute nightmare, with screaming every single day. It's the kind of hair that tangles immediately, no matter how often it's brushed. We have no choice but to keep it tied up in bunches and plaited all the time to try and stop some of the knots.

I have just bought a keratin treatment for my hair and was wondering if I should try using it on my daughter, too. I occasionally use hair straighteners on her hair which certainly helps stop it from knotting so easily, but don't do it too often as I don't want to damage her hair.

So wibu to straighten it using the keratin treatment?

OP posts:
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JiltedJohnsGhoulie · 20/10/2011 12:08

Melindaaa, what do you use on it at the moment? Shampoo, Conditioner, Serum?

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Sidge · 20/10/2011 12:12

Why don't you cut it into a chin length bob or something?

Surely better than straightening it?

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BloodyGoreyHairyKnickers · 20/10/2011 12:14

No idea. I don't know what keratin is.
The only time I've used straighteners on Dd's hair was when I wanted to trim it straight; she has extremely curly, mixed race hair that leans toward being european in texture. I use a Tangle Teezer every day to brush her hair without too much pulling drama and it is kept plaited all the time to lessen the knotting.

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Mabelface · 20/10/2011 12:15

Invest in a tangle teaser hairbrush and a bottle of Aussie leave in conditioner instead.

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valiumredhead · 20/10/2011 12:16

I would investigate products rather than straightening it which will eventually ruin its condition.

Do you use baby shampoo? I used to leave conditioner in ds's curly hair which worked well as it weighed it down.

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bombaydreams · 20/10/2011 12:16

Aussie 3 minute miracle leave in conditioner

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RamblingRosa · 20/10/2011 12:17

YABVVVU. So unreasonable that I'm wondering if this is a jokeHmm.

Some info on keratin treatments and side effects here and here.

Apart from the formaldehyde link, the keratin treatments are known to have the possible side effect of skin reactions and rashes.

Get some Johnsons leave in conditioner. Get a Tangle Teezer. Cut back on how often you wash and brush her hair. And please don't even think about applying scary chemicals to your DD's head!

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loopylou6 · 20/10/2011 12:20

Ooops, there's you well and truly told op.Grin

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spiderpig8 · 20/10/2011 12:35

My 6 yos hair is a bit like this and I soimetimes do straighten it and she looks SO different.Although I burnt her ear once! I have discoverd brushing and combing it is the absolute worst thing for it.Mostly though wash it, comb in though with conditioner on and scruch it with a bit of serum and let it dry wavy.Only 'combing' it with fingers .If I have no time for that faff I put gel on and do it in a tight french plait.

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Morloth · 20/10/2011 12:55

Cut it shorter and don't shampoo, just a good conditioner.

YABU to straighten her hair.

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Happymm · 20/10/2011 12:58

My 7th old DD has v thick curly hair that forms dreadlocks at the nape, and beautiful ringlets. She likes it long (my bitch of a mother cut mine short to avoid brushing it, but that's another story-& option for you).

We condition, condition, condition. Second Aussie leave in conditioner, and just found the joy that is morrocon oil. Beautiful stuff that she has in everyday. Conditions her hair, gives it shine, and makes it soft and manageable.

But the other biggest joy we have found is a Tangle Teaser hairbrush-no pulling, no upset, and gets all tangles out easily.

So yes, you would be unreasonable.

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Grandhighpoohba · 20/10/2011 13:00

YABU for all the reasons above, and also because you would be teaching her from a very young age that there was something "wrong" with the way she looks that needs fixing. I know that's not what you would be intending, and you are only trying to make life easier for you both, but IMO, there's a real risk that she would think that. Let her be a kid for a bit, without having to worry about her hair.

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onefatcat · 20/10/2011 13:00

I would just cut it short!

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Dialsmavis · 20/10/2011 13:03

YABU cut it off. My friends DD has a chic little bob, no arguements about brushing, no nits, looks adorable...

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ThingsThatGoFlumpInTheNight · 20/10/2011 13:07

DD1 has v similar hair. I've started using Elvive damage repair leave in conditioner spray on it and it's fantastic. I spray it on generously after washing & drying and it doesn't get tangley again for days. Brilliant stuff - also now using it myself as it makes your hair really shiny.

I wouldn't straighten it btw....

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VivaLaSativa · 20/10/2011 13:12

There is a product available called chi silk infusion. I use it on damp hair and it keeps it knot free and ridiculously soft. Its an oil but it doesn't make hair or scalp greasy at all. You can get it online. Drug store shampoos and conditioners are crap tbh and you'll be better off looking at sally salon services. Is her hair fine? I wouldn't straighten it either, that's just damaging it.

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Iggly · 20/10/2011 13:15

YABU

I agree with Grand. The way you describe her hair is horrible

  • it just needs the right looking after.


When I was a similar age I remember my mum using similar descriptions and getting my aunt to cut it short.

Ever since, I've hated my hair because it's too "difficult".

Take her to a decent sympathetic hairdressers who can cut it and recommend hair products so it's easier to take care of.
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VivaLaSativa · 20/10/2011 13:18

Cheap conditioners coat the hair shaft in silica and proteins, That in time actually damage the hairs structure. For that reason I wouldn't go for aussie products. Argan oil is expensive but worth it, Hair treatments on the high street tend to be all smelly and no welly iykwim, Go for a pro product like this. It's amazing www.sallyexpress.com/viewProduct.aspx?pid=115316

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Mandy2003 · 20/10/2011 13:27

Well, not if her dad is Peter Andre!!

Have you tried kids' detangling conditioner spray? Available from Afro-Caribbean hair product shops or I think Johnsons Baby do one now as well.

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Lizcat · 20/10/2011 13:34

I am another fan of Aussie leave in conditioner. Also very boring, but brushing hair before bed greatly reduces the tears in the morning.

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whoneedssleepanyway · 20/10/2011 13:36

I have used Moroccan hair oil on my DD1's hair and it made it much more manageable, I blow dry it on a cool heat setting and it makes it silkier and eaiser to brusyh,

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LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 20/10/2011 13:37

As someone who had hair like OP's DD times TEN, I would have begged for my hair to be straightened had they been available then.

My hair is still awkward but when it's straightened, it stays straight and is a joy to brush and look after.

I'd say that the only thing to watch is that you have hot irons (GHD) so that you only do one 'pass' over DDs hair - and use a good protection serum. I also use a leave-in balm by 'Gliss', you only need a tiny bit and it keeps my hair very silky.

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brdgrl · 20/10/2011 13:42

please don't use a chemical or a heat treatment on your DD's hair. :(
and second what grand said.

I had hair just like you're describing...and i remember how awful it was getting the tangles combed out. but i am so glad my mum never cut it short or tried to get rid of my curls. she always told me my hair was beautiful. :) which meant a lot, because growing up, the rest of the world told me all the time that there was something wrong with my curly, tangly hair. my DD has curly hair too, and I intend to teach her to love her curls. Thankfully, there are much better products for curly hair now, too, so keep trying and you will find something that works!

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brdgrl · 20/10/2011 13:42

oh, and don't brush! comb them through when wet and leave them. brushing equals frizzing, breaking, and more tangles...

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MrBloomsNursery · 20/10/2011 15:32

Have you tried Johnson's No Tangles? That's what I used on DD's hair to remove tangles.

When I saw the thread title I thought you meant straightening your DD's hair for a party or wedding...I did that 2 weeks ago for the first time...straightened her fringe. But what you're suggesting is absolutely ludicrous. Don't be stupid. Cut the hair to a bob, or use conditioner after each hair wash or get the Johnson's No Tangles. Don't put crap in her hair.

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