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to think this is a sick thing to do?

(63 Posts)
BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:02:32

my ex has put holes through every single one of my condoms. i found out on holiday at the weekend. realised one had a hole in it, checked the rest. they all had tiny holes right through them. i have already used some. have appointment at gum clinic this afternoon. i am seething. who does something like that?

MissPenteuth Mon 25-Jul-11 12:04:29

YANBU. What a bizarre thing to do, with potentially major consequences for you. Does he have form for this sort of thing??

cricketballs Mon 25-Jul-11 12:06:00

1. how do you know it was your ex?
2. how did your ex get access to your condoms?

BelleEnd Mon 25-Jul-11 12:06:44

What a nutter!

DirtyMartini Mon 25-Jul-11 12:06:48

YANBU. It is both hugely serious and deeply immature. Glad he's your ex.

cricketballs Mon 25-Jul-11 12:07:41

oh and 3. was it revenge?

ChaosTrulyReigns Mon 25-Jul-11 12:07:45

Oh BooyH, that's awful.

I hope everything goes well at the the clinic.

How on earth fid he have access to your contraceptives?

BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:09:04

ok i know it was him because i haven't had anyone else in my house except him since we split and they weren't damaged when we (me and him) were using them. he had access because he looked after our children one day while i had an appointment, it happened to be just after he found out i was seeing someone new. not sure about form for this sort of thing, he did climb through my living room window while i was sleeping the day after i asked him to leave. he was/is very posessive.

AnnieLobeseder Mon 25-Jul-11 12:10:38

Speak to the police, seriously. He climbed through your window? He put holes in your condoms? Way beyond normal. Get a restraining order and don't ever let him set foot in your house again.

BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:10:48

there could be huge consequences for our shared children as a result of this. how could anyone be so fucking selfish out of jealousy!

MrsVidic Mon 25-Jul-11 12:11:52

I really think you should make some sort of formal complaint about him to the police- this behaviour is escalating and I think you need to get the bowl rolling- he has stalker written all over him

redexpat Mon 25-Jul-11 12:12:50

shock Am speechless.

BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:13:02

he will never be in my house again. i am furious. i thought i could trust this guy to be decent as the parent of my children. i am holding back on ringing him until i have calmed down and gotten results from tests.

He's a nutcase.

What happened when he climbed in through your window?

You need to report this to the police and get legal advice.

Is he the sort of person who would harm your children to get at you?

BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:14:15

xposting-sorry. i hadn't thought of the police. that says alot about how accustomed to his behaviour i am doesn't it?

AKMD Mon 25-Jul-11 12:14:15

Call the police. They will take this extremely seriously.

cricketballs Mon 25-Jul-11 12:14:33

agree with others; speak to the police/solicitor

kaluki Mon 25-Jul-11 12:15:14

shock bloody hell!!!
Definitely go to the police and keep a record of all the things he does.
I had to get an injunction out on my ex for his dangerously out of control behaviour when I met DP.
The police are really helpful and do take things like this seriously.

AKMD Mon 25-Jul-11 12:16:22

BTW a similar thing happened at Cambridge University a few years ago: here. It is very a twisted, disturbing thing to do and you need to be protected from this man.

TheHoneyBadger Mon 25-Jul-11 12:17:16

i really think you should call the police. if you had contracted HIV as a result of this surely he would have been liable for some kind of manslaughter type charges? this is beyond irresponsible and vindictive - it's dangerous behaviour.

the arsehole would risk the mother of his children having an unwanted pregnancy or std? twat.

BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:18:22

he wouldn't physically harm the children. i think he may, if things get unpleasant between him and i, start being quite manipu;ative with them.

when he climbed through the window i went mad at him. he was halfway up my stairs when i realised someone was in the house. he 'didn't see the problem' hmm said he just needed to collect a few things. i posted here about it teh day it happened. he hasn't done anything like that since and we had been getting on well. i have bitten my tongue alot over him letting the dcs down just to save the argument but i cannot do that anymore. i am not ignoring this.

DogsBestFriend Mon 25-Jul-11 12:18:55

I'm no expert but I'd certainly be seeking police/legal advice too.

I hope that the tests come back clear and that you get the ex sorted out Booy, I can't imagine how you must be feeling. Thinking of you.

FuzzpigFourFiveSix Mon 25-Jul-11 12:19:48

Fucking hell BooyHoo sad agree with others - STD tests (and POAS?) and police

BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:20:09

would i need proof that it was him? i dont have any except that no-one else knew where the condoms were and he was the only person in the house in the last year except my cousin and she would never do a thing like that. she didnt even know where they were kept.

BooyHoo Mon 25-Jul-11 12:22:39

i got MAP as soon as i realised they were all damaged. but will obviously have to wait until AF due to test. this was the first sex since march and definitely wasn't pregnant after that.

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