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to expect that when you borrow someone's car

(56 Posts)
tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 15:44:21

for a long weekend away, which saves you hiring a car, that you'd fill the tank (or mostly fill it) with fuel before returning it?

ArfurSleep Sun 28-Nov-10 15:45:44


perhaps they forgot?

or have given a thank you gift already?

Towatessa Sun 28-Nov-10 15:46:18

YANBU - the times when I have done this I have ensured that not only has the car got a full tank, but it has also been cleaned inside and out.

NeverEatYellowTaintedSnow Sun 28-Nov-10 15:46:35

Need more info, like how much petrol was in the tank already, and who was borrowing from who, etc. Also whether there was a prior favour done by the borrower.

But generally, no, YANBU.

onepieceoflollipop Sun 28-Nov-10 15:47:05

Sometimes if people are inconsiderate they leave the same amount is as there was when they picked it up?

I think that it should be returned full, even it had far less in it than when they borrowed it. Some people are mean and rude though.

PonceyMcPonce Sun 28-Nov-10 15:47:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 15:53:43

I lent it to the guy I was seeing to go on a boys weekend. It had about 1/4 of a tank in it, and got it back just under 1/4 of a tank. I asked where the full tank was, he was genuinely confused and asked "But it was the same as I got it?"

Was having a discussion about it this morning with a friend (no longer seeing the guy - different story) who thought it was my expectation and not normal behaviour to return it with more fuel/ full tank.

HecateQueenOfWitches Sun 28-Nov-10 16:01:26

ah, so he replaced the fuel he'd used, but you were expecting a full tank as a thank you for letting him use the car?

I would expect ome sort of thank you, certainly. Did you get anything at all? Any thanks or a pressie or something?

tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 16:05:00

Yes I was expecting more fuel as a gesture of thanks. To be fair when he borrowed it he brought around some croissants. And afterwards a text saying "thanks, he had a great weekend". But that's it.

To me, it seems that you'd ensure that the person doing the favour was not out of pocket at all, including compensating for doing without the car for the weekend.

My friend disagrees.

ChippingIn Sun 28-Nov-10 16:06:37

If my boyfriend was using my car I wouldn't have any expectation of how much fuel would be in it when I got it back, so long as it wasn't completely empty - but I guess it would depend on your relationship & how you normally pay for things. I think if he was only a casual b/f and he returned it with the same amount of petrol in it that it had when he took it - I wouldn't have given it another thought - life is give & take isn't it? 'Thank you' would do for me.

bensonbutnohedges Sun 28-Nov-10 16:07:46

I lent my car to a friend once and had to go and collect it myself several days after it was meant to be returned. Petrol in the tank? You must be joking. I never lent anything to her again though.

ChippingIn Sun 28-Nov-10 16:08:28

Was it you who thought he was going on a lads weekend when he'd actually borrowed it to go to see the other girl he was shagging? If so, then he needed his nuts cut off and it had nothing to do with the petrol! If not... as you were

NeverEatYellowTaintedSnow Sun 28-Nov-10 16:08:36

I think the croissants were the thank you and were actually good enough. And if you'd wanted the tank filled, you should've agreed this as a condition of him borrowing the car. He's not a mind reader, and he did say thank you after all.

So I think YABslightlyU.

tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 16:11:02

ChippingIn - what a memory you have!! Yes it was me and this was him.

Just still apportioning blame to him and figuring out how much of a general arse he is as well

LynetteScavo Sun 28-Nov-10 16:13:16

I think it depends of the relationship. I wouldn't expect DH to fill up my car, I would expect a sibling to return the car without smashing it up, I would expect an acquaintance to fill up and possibly take to car wash.

Although I did borrow my mums car once, with a full tank and returned it empty. Thanks Mum, if you're reading!

MerrilyDefective Sun 28-Nov-10 16:13:46

Cheeky buggers.
Just ask Judge Judy,she'll tell 'em.grin

No hire fee,no petrol,no tax,(insurance?),no wear and tear?

tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 16:16:23

He paid the £40 for the extra insurance.

I'm just curious as to what is a normal expectation and what is my own unstated expecation.

tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 16:16:34


NeverEatYellowTaintedSnow Sun 28-Nov-10 16:19:48

How put out were you for the weekend?

WhyHavePets Sun 28-Nov-10 16:22:22

TBH I would have expected to return it with the same - infact I have done this when borrowing a friends car briefly. Of course she also got a huge thank you and a bunch of flowers (she is a flower-aholic!).

I would not have thought the petrol is unreasonable really.

But I think you need to stop apportionaing blame now, the guy was a major twunt, the small stuff is nothing compared to the big thing. Time to move on somehow really.

tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 16:24:22

Not much to be fair (too skint to do anything). But that's for me to decide and I don't think should have an impact on any gesture of gratitude on the borrower's part.

I lent it as a genuine gesture of kindness, without any (or so I thought) ulterior motive - but it may be that I have unspoken expectations that others don't see as normal confused

narkypuffin Sun 28-Nov-10 16:26:42

I would just expect there to be the same amount of petrol in it as there was when I handed it over. I would be shocked- but pleased - if they filled the tank.

tummysgoingslowly Sun 28-Nov-10 16:27:37

Sorry x posted

WHP you are right (why do I still get tempted to contact him! blush). It's just that my friend said this morning that I was a bit unreasonable to expect the fuel, although she freely admits the rest was twuntage smile

booyhoo Sun 28-Nov-10 16:29:41

er, not if he didn't collect it with a full tank in it. why would he fill it up to return it if there was only 1/4 tank when he got it?


ItalianLady Sun 28-Nov-10 16:30:21


Why lend a car to someone who is cheating on you?

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