Fucking hell, Nigella picture, WTF? [includes links to upsetting images]

[BoffinMum]

twitter.com/suttonnick/status/346017840106704898/photo/1

Tomorrow's Sunday People cover. Where do we even start with this?

[CaptChaos]

According to the Daily Fail. This wasn't domestic violence because he is a 'volatile' man and she is a goddess, not some pathetic victim.

I really need to get the tea and kittens app!

www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2348439/Charles-Saatchis-monster-Nigella-Lawsons-battered-wife-Carol-Sarler.html

[chartreuse]

Really pleased to see that she has moved all her things out of their house. I hope this is a new start for her. His explanation about pushing her nose just added insult to injury. Nasty man.

[Snazzywaitingforsummer]

I am yet again that this is someone who had a successful advertising career, built on the idea that he could communicate well with the public, sell them a story and understand what mattered to them. He sounds like someone who's just landed from Mars.

[duchesse]

He is a sociopath, I can't think of any other explanation.

[PoppyAmex]

"Speaking to the Evening Standard, he said: 'Even domestic goddesses sometimes have a bit of snot in their nose. I was trying to fish it out'.

What's wrong with this man?

[Animation]

I was also wondering how he is with her children. Apparently the argument had been about her children. I hope her instincts to protect them (if not herself) remains intact if he is unkind or unfair to them.

[BoffinMum]

I think it's probably not the norm, I assumed it was the same likelihood as other groups in society.

[jollyhappy]

Yes that is it KristinaM sorry I should have put a warning that it could upset people!

[ouryve]

Gosh. I shouldn't have read that, after a few drinks :(

[KristinaM]

Link isn't working for me, is this it?

[jollyhappy]

at CS helps name abusewww.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/jun/21/revulsion-saatchi-lawson-helps-name-abuse?INTCMP=ILCNETTXT3487 in the G

worth a read...

[jollyhappy]

ok.

You know i hope that this incident really spells out to everyone just how damaging DV is.

I really hope that women will not let this story die.

[emilialuxembourg]

No I didn't. I was young. Ididn't know what domestic abuse was in fact its only thanks to mumsnet that I do now.

[jollyhappy]

Wow Emillia - out of interest did you do anything - no judgement either way?

One would hope it would not be the norm but boffinmum and others may know better?

[emilialuxembourg]

Many years ago I witnessed a close friend of hers being hideously verbally abused by her husband. In fact its the only domestic abuse I've ever witnessed. Is it the norm in their milieu?

[Amazinggg]

It sounds to me like Nick Clegg hadn't actually seen the pictures, and was trying to improvise an answer based on not offending anyone.

To be honest, anyone who saw those pictures, really looked at them properly. and didn't know it was domestic violence IMO is a fucking misogynist.

So I hope he just didn't see them. I'd rather he was a twattish politician, making up 'the right answer' despite not knowing arse all about it, than a DV apologist.

[jollyhappy]

I wrote up thread how my sister was hit in a pub by her then boyfriend and only one person intervened and got her to safety - no one called the police.

Another instance I know is where a colleagues son intervened in a domestic violence situation (again in public) and guess what the thugs friends came and hit him afterwards so badly he ended up in hospital with broken ribs and black eyes. End result he was too scared to make a police complaint.

[SirChenjin]

Yeah, probably

[AitchTwoOhOneTwo]

(if it even crossed their minds in the first place).

[AitchTwoOhOneTwo]

bystander effect, innit? and the assumption that someone else will have done it.

[SirChenjin]

I'm sure lots of people don't intervene - that's the awful thing, but I was sure lots would call the police at least. Apparently no-one did, and I just can't get my head round that.

[duchesse]

Loads of people don't intervene if they see a DV situation. That's one of the horrifying things about DV- it's almost normalised and tolerated. Even the police until very recently.

It's almost as though people think "the victim wants to be abused, else why would they stay?" Which is one of the myths about DV- that the victim feels they have a choice not to endure it. DV doesn't start with physical violence or the victim would be out the door very quickly. It's a lot more subtle and corrosive than that.

[SirChenjin]

But not even phoning the police?? In what other circumstance would so many people do nothing having witnessed someone putting their hands round someone in public? I can imagine not wanting to get involved personally, but a call to the police surely?

[jollyhappy]

Just some thoughts:

1. Re bystanders not doing anything - I don't blame anyone for not intervening, even a reporter. We never know how we are going to react to violence.
   

1. We don't know the circumstances of CS and his ex wive/s and their arrangement - I imagine they have some kind of clause where they can't say too much.
   

1. Nigella must have economic independence I really really hope her family help her. She did a who do you think you are and she has a sister and brother - I really hope they help her out of the CS situation.