Think I offended the MIL

[MoaningMingeWhingesAgain]

You know how sometimes you just forget that other people don't hang out on here and think the same things, on occasion?

I am going to get myself in trouble

We are going on a self-catering holiday soon with lots of the in-laws (don't ask, it was not my idea) MIL rang me this week to tell me her latest plan. Apparently, when we get there, all the women are going to go to the supermarket to stock up for the week.

I said Bloody hell, where are we going on holiday, to the 1950's?

Ooops. And I will have no internet while we are there and she will drive me bonkers. If anyone else has some verbal diarrhoea stories to share then please do.

[Andro]

MoaningMingeWhingesAgain - you don't need chicken pox, you just need a couple of spoons full of syrup of figs/a large serving or 2 of prune juice. Oh dear! I think it would be a bad idea to go on hols MIL, I seem to be needing the.........

[TeiTetua]

Tell them that if it's a question of recreational shopping, you claim conscientious objector status.

[orangeandlemons]

Wear a strap on and sit with the men when the 'girls go shopping'. I would just not go deliberately, making it obvious why. Then I would go with dh. But I'm an awkward cow!

[cuttingpicassostoenails]

"Basically, no good ever comes of going on holiday with MILs, even lovely ones."

Rubbish.

[ashesgirl]

Oh gawd, how awful. Reminds me of my MIL who thinks we should go clothes shopping together as a "girls'" treat.

Hmm, I'm not the ideal DIL for her, methinks

[bigTillyMint]

OP, love your use of the MIL and the 1950's comment

Can't believe she's planning the shopping trip when it's not for 8weeks

[TheDoctrineOfSnatch]

Like the bingo idea!

[buttercrumble]

Sounds horrendous

[Anniegetyourgun]

Ironing, definitely, I'm sure they can manage that. My dad was the original Red-Blooded Man's Man (in his eyes at least) but he was bloody good at ironing.

Basically, no good ever comes of going on holiday with MILs, even lovely ones. Faking illness looks like the only solution.

[MoaningMingeWhingesAgain]

Well yes, he is a pretty decent human being actually and perfectly able to supervise the children even without having any ovaries

In fact he is out with the DCs now and I have no idea what they are doing.

I might make myself some MIL bingo cards to keep myself amused while we are away. She reads the Mail and has a 'thing' about benefits - she wouldn't last 5 minutes on MN. I think I need to see it as a challenge.

[TheDoctrineOfSnatch]

Annie, presumably the OP's DH is one of the "menfolk" and is a reasonable human being.

Please say what TeWi said about the ironing.

[Anniegetyourgun]

I wouldn't leave the DC with a bunch of menfolk if there's barbecues involved. MIL did that with her DS1 (my XH) when he was small. He was lucky: not only did he survive, but after extensive surgery he recovered the full use of his hands. (Could have set him up for a successful life of crime actually, as he no longer had fingerprints.) MIL never quite recovered from the guilt of not being there to prevent it. FIL, who was there, didn't seem all that worried.

Disclaimer: not all menfolk, obviously. But if the OP's MIL exemplifies the family culture, I'd say it's a risk not worth taking.

[BabyMakesTheBellyGoRound]

Now make sure you put on a nice frock and some lippy

Thank fuck my MIL is a feminist.

[MoaningMingeWhingesAgain]

Broken leg, growing a penis...I think I need something that won't involve surgery or a cast. She would promise to look after me for the week

Arf@ BBQs, they are planned too. Not DH's forte really, as a non-meat eater. He must have really let her down.

[TheHumancatapult]

Now that all depends can you leave any dc with the men folk and then have long coffee while shopping

[NiceTabard]

only the meat obv not the salads and bits that went with it

[NiceTabard]

What will the "menfolk" be doing while you are all at the supermarket - something involving fire or heavy machinery presumably?!!

We had a holiday like this once, the women did the shops and cooked all teh food, the men did the cooking on the day we had a BBQ...

[MaggieMaggieMaggieMcGill]

I was about to say, just pretend you've grown a penis for the week! deciding who goes to the supermarket based on genitalia, rediculous idea!!

[onedev]

You must be a saint as no way I could do that .

Id just give her a list of things to buy for you guys & pass on going to the supermarket!

[Booyhoo]

what would she/they do if you just stayed with the menfolk when they left for the supermarket? you know as if you were a man, pretended you never even considered going to the market just because you have a vagina? would there be a commotion?

[AKissIsNotAContract]

Don't go. Can you break your leg?

[JoJoCK]

Beatlegirl, I have sent you a pm as the destination outs me!

[Startail]

Look on the bright side, it will be a lot cheaper healthier week if you don't involved the men folk in the shopping.

(My DDs much prefer to take DH shopping due because he buys biscuits and doughnuts.)

Just make it very clear that those males who know how to cook do and those who don't wash up and hover at the end of the week.

[MoaningMingeWhingesAgain]

Don't tempt me, Fairylea.

The children have already had chickenpox so that's out...

[Fairylea]

Sounds like hell.

I'd be infectiously very ill and unable to go.....