If you want to sell to me, don't call me 'love'

[Kiriwawa]

Some bloke from e-on (the energy supplier) just rang me asking me if I would switch back to them and they were offering a really good incentive.

He started the call with 'Hey Kiri' rather than Hello Ms Wawa which irritated me to start with. And then he called me love.

Would any of you spend £1500/year with a company who called you 'love' or am I being overly cross and unreasonable?

[samandi]

Good lord, I wonder how that approach goes down. No, I certainly wouldn't be switching back to an energy supplier if they called me by my first name and then 'love'.

[notnagging]

It's not professional but it's not exclusively men saying it to women either. I get called love more from females.

[MechanicalTheatre]

I complained to Pret a Manger because one of their staff called me "darling". "Love" I can just about cope with, although I don't like it, but "darling"? FUCK OFF.

[Redbindy]

A bit unprofessional but was it worth it financially?

[SingingSands]

I live in West Yorkshire, where everyone calls everyone "love", so I'm used to it. But on a sales call I would bridle at it and expect the caller to be grovelling formal.

[CardinalRichelieu]

Rumpole of the Bailey calls men 'old love' and 'old darling' and he's a legend.

[CardinalRichelieu]

I actually quite like being called love, darling etc. by people in shops and pubs. OK, men don't call each other those things but they do call each other 'mate' and 'old son' (only in the east end) seemingly at random. So I don't find it patronising.

However, I do think that when someone is ringing you up from a company, and they know your name, they should call you Ms Whatever. I don't actually care, but in principle they should - especially when the customer is someone older. I feel a bit resentful on my granny's behalf if she gets called her first name by someone who is a total stranger. It's a bit chummy and creepy.

[MummyPigsFatTummy]

As has been said above, it is all about context. You know when you are being patronised and when you are not. In the context of the OP, it sounds like she was or at least the caller had no idea about professional boundaries. In my case the caller didn't like my attitude and used 'love' to put me down. Just made me angrier.

When the butcher calls me 'love' I know he is being friendly and have no issue with it.

All context. It isn't a north/south divide. It is an appropriate/inappropriate divide

[MrsMushroom]

Oldbloke it's not appropriate on the phone though...not unless it's your old friend or your neighbour ffs.

I mean...where I'm from, it's normal to call everyone flower or petal...I don't do it when I'm speaking to clients!

[Lessthanaballpark]

Can I sit on the fence and say it depends on the context?

[anoldbloke]

'Love' is used in Yorkshire by adults to children, men to women and women to men. It's generally an informal, egalitarian and friendly gesture in the street or in a shop.

It does seem odd in a commercial cold-call, though.

[Bue]

This annoys the hell out of me but, to borrow from another section, I think IBU. It's totally a Northern thing and isn't meant to be sexist - my right-on Northern feminist friend calls men and women love and pet all the time. That has somehow legitimised the practice for me!

[teatrolley]

You had me at 'Hey Kiri'. It makes me stabby.

[Januarymadness]

it can be patronising, condesending, dismissive and over familiar all at the same time. It does very much depend on context and tone.

[MrsMushroom]

Yanbu. When SKY customer service people say DO you mind if I call you Mushroom?

I say @Yes...it's MRS Mushroom.

And I can hear them rolling their eyes!

[whimsicalmess]

I have a saying in these situations WWHD, what would hyacinth do?

I don't think she'd approve

I can't actually think of a term like love, duck etc that irratates me.

[Januarymadness]

my family and close friends csn call me love if they want. Other than that it makes me want to rip peoples heads off.

I had a female sales assistant do 9t to me the other day in a very dismissive manner. If I had the time I would have made a formal complaint. "It's only a ..... Love"

[ByTheWay1]

hahahahaha whimsicalmess I've learned form MN that that one is wrong in sooooooooooooooo many ways

[whimsicalmess]

(waves)Northerner here too, its really not that bad IMO.

cheer up love it might never 'appen (dons hard hat)

[ByTheWay1]

Yep - usually with a me on the front as in "me love" or alternatively - for some reason "me duck" , was brought up surrounded by everyone using the word love all the time... I thought it was nice..

[ByTheWay1]

So collectively the word mate/ pal/ me old mucker conveys what exactly about men?

Sometimes it is "overthunk" (as my 12 yr old says) why does the word "love" paint a picture - when both men and women use it to men and women and children - sometimes things merely are a cultural manner of speech, and not meant as a (what exactly??) put down? term of affection?

Just because folks "darn sarth" don't talk to each other... there seems to be a lot of suspicion about people from "oop north" who do so using endearments..

[MummyPigsFatTummy]

From StickEmUp's link: "Pet names have long been a good way to shut women up. You know, ?simmer down, little lady?? "

This is precisely the way it was said to me.