Teaching with a big family

[Stuckinarutagain]

Hi there

I'm needing some advice from anyone in the same boat. It can't just be me!!

I have three children who it looks like will all be at different schools. I also have a pre-schooler and am about to have another baby. I know, crazy lady. So really my life is going to be all about babies and school runs. But I am so so desperate to go back to the classroom. I miss it so much. I am so wanting to do just a couple of days at least when baby is about six months old. But am I dreaming?? Is it possible with school runs and pre-schoolers??

I have worked so hard to achieve my dreams of becoming a teacher and feel really sad that I have to give it all up. Even though my children mean the absolute world to me I want to still stay in teaching.

If anyone is able to tell me about their success in juggling multiple school runs with pre-schoolers, please share. I would be so grateful!!

[Stuckinarutagain]

This is a great idea. One I have toyed with but needed to hear. I think this is a great first step. I was slightly hesitant to get involved with the dc's school incase it doesn't work out. But let's bite the bullet. Thanks everyone!!

[toomuchicecream]

How would you feel about approaching your DCs school to do voluntary work? Not so much parent helper hearing readers, but a Maths or English booster group with a small group of children, say 3 times a week? Could be SEN, EAL, G&T or those just under the radar who aren't achieving their potential. Would mean you were working at a loss as you would have to pay for childcare, but would also mean that you're getting/keeping your hand in and are in a school environment. You'd be more likely to hear about current initiatives and it would give you a reason to get on google/read books to broaden your knowledge and find ideas for your teaching. It would keep your brain going, get you out of the house, allow you a sense of your own identity etc etc. It would also mean you're best placed to be called on by the school when they need someone. The good schools I've worked in have been very good at identifying parents who are teachers and then involving them.

That's assuming you're primary - but if you're secondary I bet a primary would appreciate support with enrichment activities for year 6. Or approach a local secondary school with the idea.

[RegainingUnconsciousness]

glad to see a plan is coming together!

[Stuckinarutagain]

Oh, thank you for your kind words. And for not telling me to wake up!! Means a lot. We have a cleaner and ironer but I've always done everything myself where the children are concerned. They've never really had a childminder or gone to crèche. But I know I have to let go a bit if I want to get back to teaching.

I know I can't do much at the moment as baby will be joining us hopefully in January. But I am trying to work out a route for myself and if there is anything I can do for the next 8 months which gets me back on the scene.

Yes, I am pretty much up to date but have been teaching abroad for the last few years. So I need to get back in synch with UK schools.

I really tried to convince myself that setting up my own tutoring practise would be the best thing but every time I go into dcs school I know that is what is right for me.

Regaining Unconscienceness, I felt inspired by your words and motivated. Perhaps I can do both. Won't know unless I try :))

[RegainingUnconsciousness]

If your DH is earning 5x what you could as a teacher, then he can afford a good nanny to help with all the childcare logistics (and a cleaner too!), enabling you to return to teaching.

Do it! In the right places, teaching is very exciting at the moment! Are you up to date with the tech? Have a google for SOLO taxonomy and flipped learning to give yourself an edge - in fact, get your teacher-self on twitter to start networking and catching up.

[Arisbottle]

I have four children, a stepson and am expecting number five.

We could not manage without help at home ( although that would be the same whatever job I had). She comes in, in the morning gets youngest up and does his breakfast and takes him to school. She also picks him up and looks after him until either DH or I gets home.

I also have two at the school in which I teach ( which dss also attended), that made life much easier - and also meant I could see them in concerts , sports days etc.

Our eldest is at a grammar school and needs to get two buses, not ideal but manageable .

I have found teaching much more compatible with a large family than my previous career . I am finding it very hard now I am pregnant again , we have more help in the home so that I can cope.

If we have child number six, I may stop work altogether.

[bigbuttons]

It's not just the logistics of childcare though. It's all the time that would be needed out of school hours to plan, mark, assess etc .

[Stuckinarutagain]

Thanks for your kind post. My career is over because I have hit and passed the big 4-0. And it's my career because dh earns five times what I would. Again, lucky lady to have a dh with a good job in these days. But I still miss having dreams of my own. Anyhows, I must stop wallowing and go and give myself a good kick and remind myself how blessed I am. Life is good. I just so love teaching and had a lot of dreams.

[HeartsTrumpDiamonds]

No no no no no no NO! OP how old are you? Promotion is not out of your reach. Your DH is a bit of an asshole TBH to say your career dreams are now over.

However it will take careful planning. And you have to really want it.

You can't have everything. With a full time job you will be less involved with your DCs lives, just out of pure necessity. If you can delegate as much of the drudgery as possible to au pair / nanny / family PA type of people you can spend the fun and important stuff e.g. Homework and cuddles with the DCs. Maybe not right away but when your lovely surprise starts Ft nursery?

I'm also curious why it's an automatic assumption that it is your career that's over...

[Stuckinarutagain]

Thanks the posts. Some great food for thought. No, I'm not surprised. But perhaps no 5 was ; )). If I'm honest, I was looking forward to sorting out childcare somehow and getting back to the career I love. Being unable to get the children in one school and our wonderful blessing has just left me feeling a little confused that's all. As for further education, I have just finished studying a headteacher's masters which took me a long time with the children growing up. I guess I am just slowly re assimilating the knowledge that promotion is now out of my reach. And dh probably bought me to earth a bit by informing me that my career dreams are now over and it's all about looking after our gorgeous brood for me. I'm a lucky lucky lady who has been incredibly blessed. But I just wanted to achieve my career goals as well. Greedy eh ;) ?

[SDhopeful]

Agree about the nanny solution, no other way makes sense in your situation.

[RegainingUnconsciousness]

What kind of teaching do you do?

I honestly think a nanny would be your best bet (MN has led me to believe nannies cost about the same as two nursery/cm places) who could drop off/collect the older DCs and look after the younger.

A nanny would also be flexible, which would be helpful if your DH is going to be away. If they're only going to look after your children, there might be more flexibility if the DC are ill (wild speculation now!).

DH and I both teach. He leaves early, I drop DS off at cm on foot and collect on foot later. When he's older, the cm will do the school run. We share the days off when he's ill. (This does mean that we can only afford cm for one child, so won't be having a second until he's in school, but that's no help to you!)

[Bunbaker]

"You sound surprised though, which confuses me somewhat."

Yes, I thought that as well.

[SilverApples]

Sometimes you can't have everything you want, or you end up doing several things badly. It would be lovely if that wasn't the case, but usually you have to compromise.
How about doing some further education/specialising whilst your family grows up a bit? How long were you a full time classroom teacher before you stopped?
5 children is a lot to juggle and do a good/outstanding job for the children you will be teaching. You will find yourself very stretched to do your best for everyone involved, including yourself.

[HeartsTrumpDiamonds]

Of course I only have 2 DC so I'm not even qualified to talk about larger families!!!

[HeartsTrumpDiamonds]

I think the tough part about teaching jobs is that during term-time there is so little flexibility about working hours in a given day.

I am not a teacher (so no contact time!) so the 3 days a week I take my own DC to school, I don't get to work until about 9.05 but it's no problem, even though the school day starts for everyone else at 8.15 (staff) and 8.40 (pupils). We are lucky to have our old cleaner around who picks up the DC (year 3 and year 5), gets them to their after school activities, makes them do their homework, even feeds them. She is really an after-school nanny now. I get home around 6 or 6.30. It has taken a while to get to the stage where everything is so lovely and settled and it actually feels quite easy now! DH also has the type of job where it is hard to rely on him for anything although he can usually manage to share a couple of morning school runs. We just can't count on it though.

[Bunbaker]

How will you cope when one of your children is unwell and wants their mother?
I must admit the logistics of coping with lots of children was one of the factors that put me off having a large family (as well as my internal plumbing letting me down)

[HeartsTrumpDiamonds]

We just hired a new staff member at my school who is a lone parent and has 3DC, 2 in school and 1 in Nursery. She has to be here by 8.15 and finishes at 2.30. Her solution is a childminder - she drops the 3 DCs at the childminder's (luckily I believe they even live in the same block of flats) and the childminder drops them at nursery and at school. Mum picks them up.

I think it's partly luck in finding a solution! If my new colleague hadn't found this childminder she would be in a much tougher situation.

Good luck OP

[Joycey29]

I do teach on same campus but currently teach yr5 while dd is in yr3, ds in yr1 and dd2 in Pre-school.
Love being in school and having long holidays with them.
I'm never more than 6 weeks away from a holiday with my kids!

[Stuckinarutagain]

Thanks Joycey. So do you teach at the same school as your school?? You're an inspiration. Congratulations!!

[Stuckinarutagain]

Thanks for the replies. I have thought about tutoring but my heart is in the classroom. And yes, supply would be lovely but I still have the problems with all the school runs and the pre-schoolers. How does everyone do it? I'm missing something. I just feel like I'm losing me : ((. Think it's the pregnancy hormones that's making everything seem worse at the moment. My dh will probably be working long hours if not abroad soon.