It's home!

[puppypalavas]

Got our puppy today.
Been about 8 hours since we’ve had her and I’ve got puppy blues already!
She’s doing ok toilet wise. Maybe 3 inside, 3 outside and a poo outside.
Got her confined to the kitchen at the mo and she’s got a playpen in here.
We’ve got a deep sided box for her for our room tonight.
We’ve put her in her playpen probably 5 times, for short durations, 15 mins or so.
Then we went to the shop to find a box for her for tonight, so we were out for 40 minutes.
She’s howls and cries and barks solidly in her playpen.
As soon as she’s quiet we go in and praise her. Sometimes getting her out and sometimes leaving her in there.
Every single time though she has barked and howled in her playpen until she’s vomited. She’ll be losing weight at this rate.
Am I doing the playpen thing right?

[Bunnybigears]

It’s like having a newborn, but worse as you can’t even take it anywhere with you and you can’t put a nappy on it. yep thats exactly what its like and why Ive never had one. But you have it now so you can adjust your expectations and plan accordingly. Start your research again and you will be fine.

[Vallahalagonebutnotforgotten]

What are you doing at Christmas?

[Wolfiefan]

Your pup sounds like mine was. I couldn’t leave here. Not for a minute. I had to sleep by her. I couldn’t take a shower, collect the kids or even leave her long enough to go for a pee!
It passes. It’s bloody hard but it passes. Not leaving your puppy now will build trust and a strong bond. It’ll decrease the chance of separation anxiety later.
Mine is now two. Not fussed to be left for a bit as long as we don’t disturb her hectic nap schedule after her walk.
Shame you’re not my neighbour. I could do with borrowing a pup for an hour or two to get my puppy fix!

[adaline]

Take puppy with you. They can go out in a sling or a handbag or doggy backpack, you just can't walk them until after they've had their vaccinations.

Young puppies ARE hard. They require 24/7 care for the first few weeks. You've taken her from her mum and siblings and everything she knows and are then expecting her to be okay with being alone in a strange house with new smells and sounds.

They need taking out to the toilet every 20-30 minutes, after meals, after naps, after drinks, after training and after play. They need constant supervision to make sure they're not peeing on the floor, or eating something they shouldn't.

The puppy blues are a real thing, and then you have the horror of the adolescent phase!

[puppypalavas]

So realistically... in January I need to work as a school dining assistant (dinner lady)
Please tell me this will be ok. I’ll be out for 2 hours ish with travel. And I’m doing 3 days a week.
Am I going to be able to do this?
Or should I cancel work? Financially we can do without me working, but I figured 2-2.5 hours would be ok?
This is why we got the puppy now, as with private school terms I’m off until January now.

[puppypalavas]

I’m here for Xmas. Here for a few weeks as private schools have longer school holidays.

[Wolfiefan]

Unfortunately it’s not possible to say for sure as they’re all so different. Mine wouldn’t have been ok at that age but I’m sure many others would.
What breed?

[DoinItForTheKids]

Jeez, this is bad planning personified. What 'breeder' did you get this dog from OP?

[eliolip]

have you thought this through atall?!

[BiteyShark]

I read the books, did the research, spoke to friends etc, but this is still a million times harder than I thought it would be. Friends I had spoken to said that puppies could be left for an hour max

I quickly realised I had to ignore any comments like 'my puppy slept through straight away', 'my puppy was fine to be left' etc. Articles online tend to be very black and white, lots contradict each other and most advocate their way is the only way to do it. In real life most people will have forgotten how bloody hard the early puppy days are and will be looking back with rose tinted glasses or you get people who had an easy puppy who can't offer any help because theirs was one of the few that didn't cry and slept all day.

Your puppy is an individual and as you have found being left alone for that long so soon is far far too much. What I would advise is to have a scan through the puppy survival threads on here to see the actually reality of things you might face and how people have managed them.

[Costacoffeeplease]

I wouldn’t be leaving her for 2 hours a day in January (ish meaning 2.5/3 hours?) as I doubt she’ll be house trained by then so will need that to continue so as not to confuse her. You really didn’t think this through very well

[Bunnybigears]

Even if you dont go back to work until mid Jan puppy will only be 12 weeks (if I have got that right) still may be too young to leave whilst you are at work especially as you will also be leaving it on school runs and in evenings for after achool clubs etc.

[BiteyShark]

So realistically... in January I need to work as a school dining assistant (dinner lady). Please tell me this will be ok.

As your puppy won't have had all his/her vaccinations then any puppy day care is probably out of the question. What I would recommend is to phone around all the dog walkers you can find and see if any have spaces to do a puppy visit where they come into your house to play and sit with them. However, lunch times is the more lucrative time for dog walkers so I think you will struggle to find people for those times. Do you know anyone who might puppy sit for a bit of money?

[puppypalavas]

It’s fine. I’ve just spoken to a dog sitter who can do the lunch slot when I’m working in January until she no longer needs anyone with her.
Only problem is the dog sitter costs more than I get paid!
Oh well, it won’t be forever!

[adaline]

Please tell me this will be ok. I’ll be out for 2 hours ish with travel. And I’m doing 3 days a week. Am I going to be able to do this?

Personally I think, no, that's too long to leave a 12 week old puppy. Far too long. Mine wouldn't have coped at that age - first off, he'd have needed the toilet during that time, and secondly, he'd be distressed at being left alone for that amount of time.

Can you speak to the daycare providers you mentioned earlier and see if any of them have availability for January? Or see if someone can come and sit with the puppy while you work?

[BiteyShark]

Just seen your update. Good news OP. No it won't be forever but at least you have it covered until they are older.

[puppypalavas]

Puppy is 10 weeks today. So 13 weeks when I go back.
Surely people with dogs work?
They don’t all take 3 months off work to sit with their dogs?

[adaline]

X-post. That's good news :)

Puppies are overwhelming but you'll look back and in a few weeks and realise how far you've come. It does get easier, I promise.

[ExcitedForChristmas18]

Are you sure you done research before getting this puppy?!
You can not leave a dog for at least a few weeks after getting her, and then it's a very slow process.. maybe ten minutes for a couple of days, then twenty. That is exactly why rescue centres will not give dogs to anybody over Christmas, because people are too busy and the dog needs one on one attention constantly.
She will be absolutely petrified of everything, and you getting her trust is crucial over the next few weeks!! I have never ever left any of my puppies for at least three weeks after getting them. You should of done more research 😡

[adaline]

Surely people with dogs work?

Key word there being dogs, not puppies. Puppies absolutely shouldn't be left for long, a couple of hours here and there as they get older, sure, but otherwise no, they shouldn't be alone for too long.

Mine is almost 11 months old and he goes to daycare while we work. That'll continue for the foreseeable future as it's absolutely not fair (in my opinion) to leave a dog alone all day.

[BiteyShark]

Surely people with dogs work?They don’t all take 3 months off work to sit with their dogs?

I work full time. I spent just over the first month completely at home with my puppy getting him trained as much as possible as well as building up the time he was on his own. After that he went to daycare.

[Bunnybigears]

Surely people with dogs work?
They don’t all take 3 months off work to sit with their dogs? yes people with dogs work but they have a plan. Either getting an older dog, dog daycare, dog walkers, family members etc. Most people who make life changing decisions will have a plan.

[puppypalavas]

I did do research!
Even my husband just commented that he didn’t realise it would be this bad.
Puppy books do not prepare you for how horrific this is?
They say that puppies can be left for short periods and you should only go into them when they are calm - this puppy cannot even go 5 minutes without vomiting.
They say use the cry it out method and ignore them totally - not a chance the racket she makes.
I suppose at least the toilet training isn’t going too badly.

[Namechangeforthiscancershit]

^Puppy is 10 weeks today. So 13 weeks when I go back.
Surely people with dogs work?^

Sorry, the age thing is my fault I think as I thought she was 8 weeks for some reason.

10 weeks is alveolus age to get them I think.

I do work but puppy comes with me (usually 3 weeks) and goes to daycare the other days which is loves. I pay £18 a day and it’s so good for his socialisation as he’s playing with other dogs all day (well other than sneaking some cuddles with the owner and a bit of time in front of the fire). That’s been great for me. He had to have all his jabs first. I think he started there at about 4 months.

[DoinItForTheKids]

I'll say straight away, I've never had a puppy. My guess is that it would be like a very needy hair covered baby but one that you can't feed to sleep with a bottle! Needing constant reassurance and contact, consistent and continual help with toileting and food and getting to learn its environment. I wouldn't expect to leave the puppy alone at all for at least a week and wouldn't be surprised to feel that they would need to come with me in the same room for several weeks after that if I went for a bath, whatever. Every single thing the puppy would be experiencing, floors, noises, smells, people, would be completely brand new and in some cases frightening until gotten used to. If I was thinking of getting a pet I'd know in advance which sitters / pet services were around me and how in advance they get booked up. My own pet sitter I used to use for my cat is booked up for summer boarding and home visits 2 years in advance and I wouldn't put myself in the position of getting a sitter on a last minute basis hoping they were ok (because good ones tend to be booked up well, well in advance). But I wouldn't get a puppy because I know that I can't give that care to one as I work full time. I wouldn't have an older dog because we're all out o f the house for the whole entire day and it would cruel (and I couldn't afford two visits a day to feed, check, let out into the garden, walk) and that's why I don't get a dog despite the fact I'd love one. If I was looking for a dog it would be an older one from rescue because I already know I do not want (because I couldn't provide for the needs of) a puppy and wouldn't want to try - neither would I want a kitten. That's with no research at all, it's just common sense I'd have thought. IF I were to get a puppy it would be if I knew I had three weeks off and then was working low part time hours after that because how else would you even be able to contemplate having a puppy (unless you've got a steady stream of family to cover off the whole day one way or another)?

What 'breeder' did you get the puppy from OP?