New puppy parents, come cheer me up!

[Panicmode1]

I was expecting hard work. I was expecting mess. I was expecting the chewing. And the mess. And the poo. But it's way harder than I was expecting and I'm struggling. And we're only two weeks in.

I was at the vet at 2am this morning after she had been straining and straining to poo for over 2 hours and was then violently sick - it seems that she had been eating small stones, even though I thought I was watching like a hawk.....she's still not right this morning so I think I may end up having to go back. DH didn't want a dog and feeling very justified in his "I told you sos" this morning!

I know I am very sleep deprived and grumpy, but puppy parents further along than me, cheer me up and tell me how brilliant it is when they are a bit older - pleeeeaaaaaasseeee!

[senna123]

it gets so much better!! I love my puppy more and more .

She is now 7months and has settled down dramatically. I know 7months seems a very long time away but it is so worth the wait. I would say my puppy started really calming down at 5 months. It will get easier!

[NanaNina]

I can sympathise with you all. I'd never had a dog as a child and we got one when the kids were teenagers - a lab bitch. OMG I was so not prepared for all the biting and biting and biting and the "frantic episodes" when she dashed madly round the house! We used to put her in the garden (she couldn't get out) for about 30 mins about 10 at night when she went loopy.

Things got better when the needle sharp baby teeth fell out at around 16 weeks. But then the walks on the park were stressful - she'd run after any dog in sight, and I'd be scared she wouldn't come back but she always did.

There's been a TV programme on recently following 6 families and their puppies. I was amazed at how little some of these people knew about dogs and their expectations were incredible. One family had a wiemeraner (crossed with something else) as they wanted it as a soul mate for their rather difficult son! Needless to say that didn't happen and they seemed to think they could just leave the pup to his own devices and he ran amok!

When they got in puppy trainers, the solutions seemed so simple - give them toys to chew, make sure they have enough exercise. They showed how to stop a dog jumping up -fold your arms, turn your back, drop a toy on the floor and reward them when they are playing on the floor. It's all about rewarding good behaviour - positive reinforcement all the way along. Dogs want to please us but don't always know what we want.

Also and very importantly dogs must be the lowest member of the "pack" (the family) and must not be allowed to become dominant, as this can be dangerous. My son's 8 month lab growled at me and sort of "went for my hand" didn't break the skin but I wasn't happy. Mind I was trying to get food out of his mouth that he'd had out of the waste paper bin and I was assured by the vet and an animal behaviourist I consulted that he was just "trying it on" as he wanted the food. My son shook him when it happened and put him on his bed. There weren't any more problems.

SO puppy owners - take heart - yes it's hard work and there will be times when you wonder if you've done the right thing. I know people are saying it gets easier around 4 months but by 7/8 months you're into adolescence and they can be very boisterous and wilful at this age. BUT in around 18 months you will have a well behaved dog (provided you've trained him properly) for a very long time. AND when he dies, your heart will break.

[BabeRuthless]

It'll get so much easier when you can start taking them for walks and they can burn off that excess energy. There's nothing like the feeling of watching your dog running around a field with its tongue hanging out!

[Panicmode1]

THANK YOU ALL!!! It's helped so much knowing I'm not on my own and these feelings are totally normal. And thank you ChufMuffin about the stone advice, that's a great idea.

However, I really need help with mouthing/biting (perhaps I should start a different thread)?

This morning she jumped up at DD, and has ripped her sweatshirt (a tiny bit) because she was 'biting' at her clothes, and then nipped DS1 because she was chewing his sock - DS1 was standing still and giving no attention but she seems to get so excited. This is the bit I am really struggling with because she doesn't seem to understand that biting toys is acceptable, but biting people or clothes isn't.....any ideas how I get her to stop? The puppy trainer told us last night not to touch the dog but to totally ignore it, but I can't ignore jaws just below my daughter's face. We have tried turning our backs, giving her toys that she can chew, but I think perhaps we aren't being consistent. She doesn't seem to listen to 'no' - probably because there are four children and they are all saying "No, no, no, no, no" etc. I have told them not to talk to her all at once....

Also at the puppy class last night, everyone else's pups seemed to be licking the treat - Rosie tries to bite all the time, and I don't know how to teach her to be more gentle. Any tips please?!

[Silverjohnleggedit]

Google Kikopup mouthing and biting, this really works. Clicker training solved a large part of the problem for us pretty quickly.
Ignoring doesn't work with kids, imo they get upset and scream or just forget the rules.
High pitched scream made my pup even more excited.

[Panicmode1]

Thanks Silverjohn, off to google now!

[lampygirl]

We taught our pup to take treats gently but it took a bit of sacrifice of skin on the ends of fingers. We basically resisted and held onto the treat and removed it if she snapped for it and only let go of it when she was gentle. Not sure if this works for everyone but she now takes them extremely gently. Best waiting til the puppy teeth have gone though. Those needles are little bastards.

[crapcrapcrapcarp]

Also and very importantly dogs must be the lowest member of the "pack" (the family) and must not be allowed to become dominant, as this can be dangerous. My son's 8 month lab growled at me and sort of "went for my hand" didn't break the skin but I wasn't happy. Mind I was trying to get food out of his mouth that he'd had out of the waste paper bin and I was assured by the vet and an animal behaviourist I consulted that he was just "trying it on" as he wanted the food. My son shook him when it happened and put him on his bed. There weren't any more problems.
Just to add, since this thread includes some novice dog owners, that the above advice is not relevant and the vet and "behaviourist" were incorrect in saying the dog was trying it on our inferring that the dog was dominant in any way. The dog was guarding. The way this situation was handled is likely to make this dog guard the next thing it steals even more aggressively.

Dogs are not on a quest to become dominant. They are not pack animals, and even if they were they know that we are not dogs and they would not expect us to be part of a pack. Dog behaviour is much simpler than that - dogs do what works for them.

Please don't let anyone (vets, "behaviourists" or otherwise - we vets receive little to no training on behaviour, and behaviourists are completely unregulated so anyone can call themselves one, even if they're basing their advice on a few episodes of some Cesar Millan rubbish) tell you that your dog is trying to dominate you, because it's simply untrue.

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

But DDog 1 was my dog of a lifetime. He just had eyes that could see into your soul, and I would do anything to have him back.

This. So this.

Love these threads though. Am looking forward to having a puppy in the spring, if we can find one, and it's been eleven years since my old boy was a youngster and I'm getting a bit nervous.

[ender]

NanaNina - pack/dominance theory was debunked a long time ago.

[Spybot]

Please consider getting a crate for your dog. It will give you a break when you need to go out or cannot keep an eye and it will give the dog somewhere cozy and safe to chill out. My dog is a year, we've had her 5 months and she still has things in her mouth all the time. I did the same with my older dog when I first had him as he would get into stuff. Plus they will not mess in their own crate so it should help you with structuring their toilet routine. General rule, as soon as they come out of crate they go outside to toilet. Hope this helps.

[ScrummyPup]

OP we had the biting problem with our puppy and the trainer said the puppy was seeing the children as toys. He said to make sure there was a toy as an interface between the puppy and child. If this behaviour has become ingrained, it's all about distraction, so carrying few bits of kibble to throw down and distract the dog, or a toy to hand over. Things seem to have improved here.

[ScrummyPup]

Sorry - meant the child should carry the kibble or toy.

[NanaNina]

Oh gawd I didn't think this would be a thread where there was conflict! Crapcrap The dog in question is now 9 years old and is a very gentle loving family pet. There have never been any other concerns about his behaviour. So my son's actions (taken immediately after the incident) so action and consequence were related, did not exacerbate this kind of behaviour as you suggest. You are a very strange vet if you think dogs are not pack animals - of course they are. And dogs can become dominant if they are allowed to "rule the roost" so to speak and a dominant dog is a potentially dangerous dog.

Ender that's an interesting article. It's just one viewpoint though. I still think it's important that the dog isn't allowed to become dominant.

OP - if you have "Catchup" TV it might be Worthing finding the programmes I mentioned - they were on BBC2 I think and quite recently (called "6 puppies and us") I think. It was on for 2 nights and followed 6 families with 6 different breeds of puppy. The jumping up in puppies was explained by a dog trainer as the puppy trying to reach your face because they like human faces, as that's where all the interaction is........sounds logical.

I think teaching a puppy good manners is a lot like teaching children. Lots of praise for the behaviour you want, but be careful not to have expectations that can't be met. I think to expect a young puppy to stop biting (he's teething) and jumping up is like expecting a baby to get up and walk! We bought a paperback called "How to have a Well Mannered Dog" forget who wrote it, but it was spot on - we followed the advice with excellent results.

[LoathsomeDrab]

You are a very strange vet if you think dogs are not pack animals - of course they are.

Really, they're not.

They're social animals but not pack animals. Feral dog populations do not form true packs (i.e. a stable group comprised of related individuals), instead they form very loose social groups with individuals coming and going all the time and completely unrestricted mating.

Even for true pack animals, such as wolves, dominance theory has been debunked as the original research (upon which all "dominance theory" in dog training is based) was done using an unrelated group of adult wolves forced to live together in an unnatural setting which unsurprisingly resulted in an abnormally high level of conflict.

that's an interesting article. It's just one viewpoint though.

It's not just one viewpoint though, it's the scientific viewpoint based on research which has completely debunked dominance and pack theory.

[Panicmode1]

Spybot, she has a crate. Today when she got too bitey, I put her in there with some toys and she fell asleep - I think perhaps she's been getting overtired, so I will try that again tomorrow!

[basildonbond]

If you think of her as a hairy toddler you won't go far wrong

DPup was hideous when he was very little if he hadn't slept properly so we made sure he had regular naps in the crate (with a blanket over it so he could switch off properly). I was much stricter about his nap routine than I ever was with the dc ....

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

nina I have to say I agree with crapcrap (why that username? ) she does talk sense, and has good form. You can google the pack theory very easily, the debunking of it is very well known.

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

My first attempt at that message gave you god form. I don't know you that well!

[DressingGownFrown]

DP cried, yes CRIED because he found the puppy so difficult and again, pup was mine, so he felt like 'this was it' and he had 'lost' me to the awful little dog that I wanted.
He now walks around cradling him like a baby and is more protective of him than I am.

[DressingGownFrown]

A really high pitched wail, like a dog in pain worked for our puppies biting, to an extent. looking at you one year old bitey dog
And nobody ever is allowed to play with the puppy without a toy, never ever any playing just with hands because then the puppy will be confused. We didn't do this with ours but if we had children that would probably be the number one rule.

[crapcrapcrapcarp]

MsAdorabelle

[JoffreyBaratheon]

That idea that dogs are somehow plotting to "rule the roost" is a load of rubbish. The only evil plot my dogs have ever had was how to slowly take over the most comfortable end of the sofa. Also dominance does not equal aggression. I used to work in kennels and for me, the most aggressive dogs were in fact the ones that were fearful (for whatever reason). How are fearful dogs 'dominant'?

Re puppy biting every piece of advice I have found hasn't particularly worked and seems to me to be either wishful thinking, or advice coming from someone with a not particularly persistent pup.

Offer a toy as alternative? No. Your leg is far more interesting.

Ignore? Try ignoring me sinking these choppers into your leg whilst I wag my tail furiously because this is even more fun now you're standing still...

Walk away? OYR. Try that with a dog attached to your leg. You'll have to disengage me first. Good luck with that. This is FUN!

Yelp? Haha - that reminds me of the time I sat on the head of my littermate, Stinky... Hilarious! Love it. Yelp more!

[minicar]

If I could go it again, I would adjust my schedule to according to the puppy's sleeping times. Just take some rest while he naps. My dog tends to sleep longer if I'm sleeping too. Took 3-4 weeks to adjust and know which things can be left safely and what not.

[minicar]

Regarding puppy biting, my dog learned a lot in doggy daycare not to bite legs from older dogs. I just couldn't react calmly as written in the books. Then he eventually grew out of it.