Dispatches - Growing Up Poor

[TurquoiseKiss]

Did anyone see this? I'm half way through on catch up - very tough to watch.

[JustAnotherPoster00]

And after watching Cathy Come Home, have a blast at I am Daniel Blake

[ssd]

I've just watched something on the news, about poor families using food banks. One couple had slept in a homeless shelter the last year and are using a food bank. They are voting for Boris (their words not mine).. Another guy slept on the streets and said he always voted Conservative.

I fucking despair.

[HeIenaDove]

Eh???????????????

[Chickydoo]

Breaking my heart watching this.
Life is really shit sometimes
The system is so broken

[Womenwotlunch]

@ssd the irony of these people voting for a party that has introduced policies that make it worse for the poor.

[Nat6999]

I wasn't a million miles away from being in that situation when I first became a single parent. After paying the balance of my rent, council tax & utilities I had £54 a week to feed & Clothe myself & ds, the only way I managed some weeks was to skip.paying either the rent & council tax or let the direct debit for gas & electric bounce. I was still working then but my salary & tax credits just wouldn't stretch to cover everything, I couldn't afford to work any more hours as they would take it off my tax credits & housing benefit, I was actually better off once I had been finished at work due to ill health & claiming Employment & support allowance as I then got all my rent & council tax paid & my money just had to cover utilities & food. I can remember being terrified every time someone knocked at the door or the postman came, I even trained ds that unless we were expecting anyone calling that we didn't answer the door & kept quiet until they went away. My heart went out to the families in the programme as it could happen to anyone, a job loss, accident or illness can mean an end to income

[JustAnotherPoster00]

as I then got all my rent & council tax paid

Tories got rid of the full CT&HB payment and also added the bedroom tax just to make sure we felt it

[HeIenaDove]

@Nat6999 The stress must have been astronomical.


@ssd Your post has reminded me of another post i saw elsewhere on this board.

Someone else posted that its as if the country is in an abusive relationship with the current Gov.

[HeIenaDove]

speye.wordpress.com/2016/04/04/bedroom-tax-and-a-sanctuary-non-room/

[AnnaNimmity]

@dottypotter you really have no clue.

[Frequency]

No I'm not lucky my father didn't run off. Today's generation haven't got the commitment

You're right. I 100% agree. Today's woman lack the stamina of yesteryear's women where all they needed to cover the bruises of a violent relationship was a bit of covergirl concealer, a smile and a lame excuse of falling down the stairs.

All these pesky abused women leaving their abusers, taking their kids with them and expecting society to give them a helping hand while they recover. The world is going to Hell in a hand cart.

My mother stayed with my father because she couldn't afford to leave and 'no-one would believe her'. The school did the right thing and turned a blind eye to the bruises, even when myself and my youngest sister screamed from the rooftops about what was happening and begged for help. SS were nowhere to be seen. My Grandma told us we should stop encouraging my mum to runaway because people might talk...

Things were much, much better in those days. I yearn for the days when I listened to my mum being beaten for hours on end because my dad had had one too many after work. I wish my kids had the same but I'm of the spoiled generation who didn't have the stamina and left my abusive ex when he threw me out onto the street with only the clothes on my back. Do you think if I begged hard enough he'd let me come back and be a proper family so I don't have to rely on tax credits and top-up benefits like a scrounger?

[friendlyflicka]

I know the point of this programme is the poverty. And I know the poverty and the health are intertwined but I do feel really annoyed with the GCSE girl's dad. I know he is depressed but ... and why doesn't she get help with her books if she is a pupil premium student?

[christmassymcchristmas]

@Shinesweetfreedom are you sure about that? A household income of 20,000 or more?! Erm, no thanks

[HeIenaDove]

 <img loading="lazy" class="inline-flex mumsnet-emoji" alt="Thanks" src="https://www.mumsnet.com/assets/images/mumsnet-emojis/archived/thanks.png">

[friendlyflicka]

Sorry, Danielle. I had forgotten her name.

[HeIenaDove]

I dont have DC and have no idea about the finer details of pupil premium but there are quite a few MNers who are very well versed in this aea

[DuckWillow]

Dotty posted note Tory bollocks I see.

Be honest love, you're a Tory bot aren't you? It's SO clear.

You're not responding to comments to you, just posting more stupid idiocy.

Thankfully many of us are more intelligent than you and can see your silly stunt for what it is.

[DuckWillow]

friendly

Pupil Premium is awarded to the school and not the parent. The school needed to make that decision but often money is diversified into supporting several pupil premium students rather than just one.

[Frequency]

I don't think you get help with books (or school uniform - the mythical uniform allowance single parents get is exactly that - mythical).

The school get a premium but apart from free school meals -which if you have a teen in secondary aren't actually free because they never get enough to last a week- and the occasion reduced cost school trip the parents don't see a penny of the premium.

I'm not sure why you're annoyed with the depressed father? Do you not understand how depression manifests itself in some people? A common symptom of depression is lethargy and chronic lack of motivation. For some sufferers of depression just getting out of bed can be mentally and physically exhausting and the wait for MH support is ridiculous. I know of a family whose teenager is waiting three months for an urgent MH assessment. The teen self harms and talks about dying frequently but they cannot be seen sooner as the local CAHMS has had it's funding cut and don't have enough staff.

Be sure to vote Tories folks, we don't want those paupers getting mentally healthy. They might steal our jobs and our taxes

[LucheroTena]

This was the saddest programme, a really hard watch. The inequality in this country is sickening. I grew up very poor in the early 70s but at least our housing (council) was stable and we could afford to eat. I remember how it felt to have very little (single parent family) but not this bad. Terrible to see them walking all those miles to food banks and living in a single room. It’s inexcusable that things have got worse rather than better. The children in this documentary were so grown up and bright and it makes me furious to think that they are likely to be disadvantaged their whole lives.

[HeIenaDove]

From another thread.....................



HeIenaDove Tue 03-Dec-19 20:52:44
Posted by @YeTalkShiteHen last year

YeTalkShiteHen Mon 30-Jul-18 17:20:13
"Oh I forgot lawnmowers cost a lot too, so grass would be a challenge.

My friend who got her property because she was fleeing DV and is on benefits (no she’s not a bloody scrounger) was fined by our council twice because she hadn’t cut the grass because she can’t afford a fucking lawnmower! They fined her £125 each time and then charged £125 for the council to do it! So a £500 fine effectively because she was skint in the first place!

I bought her one because I’ve been where she is and it’s shit, really fucking shit. And being judged just makes it worse"

Bookmark
Add message | Report | Message posterHaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend Wed 04-Dec-19 19:29:52
"Helana, she could have asked a family friend, neighbour, posted on Facebook for a handyman, alternatively what my mother used to do was cut the grass with sheers.

You friend under her tenancy agreement took responsibility for her garden, and yes her circumstances are unfortunate but she signed the agreement.

Also to be fined twice, seasonally it would be 2 summers, you cannot expect councils to spend tax payers money to look after people’s home gardens hmm"

Add message | Report | Message posterHaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend Wed 04-Dec-19 19:34:19
"People are all for being up and arms when councils don’t keep to their own policies, however when they take action for their own polices that tenants have signed into an legal agreement with, then suddenly it’s apparently abhorrent!

Councils aren’t judging tenants they are enforcing the lawful agreement the tenant signed!"

[HeIenaDove]

No wonder women dont feel able to LTB!

[friendlyflicka]

@Frequency yes I am familiar with depression. I have had severe bipolar all my life. I just think that he could have watched what he said a little bit more. I wasn't talking about him not doing much. The children felt really responsible for him and his welfare.

My children are pupil premium children and my daughter got a lot of revision books last year, I thought that was quite commonplace. It is not a huge amount of money and it is directly related to academic success which is the point of pupil premium.

[friendlyflicka]

And sadly I have experience of the CAMHS underfunding as well.

I am bit tired of daring to say something slightly critical about someone with mental health issues on this site and being told I don't understand what mental illness can do. I do understand. But people with mental health issues are still people and subject to a certain amount of responsibility for the way they act and the burden they place on their kids. It doesn't absolve you of all choice.

[Frequency]

The local secondary here don't do that. I work full time now, so even though technically, we're still classed as being in poverty, we don't get the pupil premium. DD's boyfriend does. She took her revision guide to the local college and photocopied huge chunks of it because his family couldn't afford the £6.99 the school asked for to provide one.

I was a student there at the time so I got free photocopying. One thing that always baffled me was I got 'free school meals' as an adult in education even though my course was only 15 hours a week and most days I was home in time for or just after lunch. I also got a bursary I could apply to for books and equipment but my children who were in school 25 hours a week and who studied far more subjects than I did were not entitled to anything