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Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenagers

would you let you 13 camp

60 replies

Orchidlady · 17/07/2013 09:45

DS 13 has got into his head that he would like arrange a camp out in a field, think rural field if farmer agrees. I don't think he is old enough, I also do not know any of the people he wants to invite and not sure other parents would be too happy about this. Am I being over protective?

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chocoluvva · 03/08/2013 13:44

Thanks for the update - always nice to have a happy ending. No signs of alcohol consumption after all.

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Orchidlady · 03/08/2013 13:14

Well an update. I decided to allow him, we got permission from a neighbour, ( field less than a 5 minute walk) there were 2 girls and 3 boys. DS popped back several times, left door open so girls could use the loo. I have to say they were brilliant, what a lovely bunch of kids. Made them all bacon butties the next morning. No problems. I am very proud of him and them. in fact doing another one tonight

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50shadesofvomit · 21/07/2013 13:32

I have a 12 year old and would do a practice run in the garden.

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jellybeans · 21/07/2013 12:29

No but probably would at 15/16

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flow4 · 21/07/2013 10:04

No, they wouldn't. Last year my DS, then 17, tried to find somewhere where he, a 17yo friend and an 18yo friend could camp for 2 nights. He phoned in advance to 3-4 campsites and was turned down flat. I called 2-3 more on his behalf, and eventually found one who would allow them to stay.

I camped at 16-17 without adults, several times, and it never crossed my mind to check, nor were we ever challenged. But things seem to have changed... I do think it's sad.

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dexter73 · 20/07/2013 21:35

Can't imagine a proper campsite would let a group of unsupervised teenage boys in.

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Turniptwirl · 20/07/2013 20:10

Yes but make them go to a proper campsite not just a field

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DuelingFanjo · 19/07/2013 16:04

My parents let me and a group of friends camp out at around age 11/12. However they got together with all the other parents and had a rota where one parent would pop in on us to check we were all ok. Could you do this?

We got flooded out in the end but spent a night camping next to a group of boy scouts which was fun.

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soontobeslendergirl · 19/07/2013 16:03

Ha Ha backforgood :o there are a lot of good kids about - just the minority that give them a bad name.

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BackforGood · 19/07/2013 15:59

Soon That reminds me of when my ds (aged 15 / 16ish) was stopped on his way home on night about 10.45, walking with a few mates of similar age. The police van drew up

"Alright lads - where you going?"
"On our way home now"
"OK, where you been"
"Well, youth club first, but then on to the park"
"Oh yes, what you been doing in the park"

"Er.... playing Hide and Seek"

Police were great - told them to give them a shout next time as they wanted to play too

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Orchidlady · 19/07/2013 14:18

soonHey we could start a whole thread on that, oh bless hide and seek. They might be teenagers but still so what to be kids underneath it all

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soontobeslendergirl · 19/07/2013 09:53

despite! fat brain today, can't even blame it on my fingers!

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soontobeslendergirl · 19/07/2013 09:52

sometimes dispite all the posturing, they just want to be wee boys :)

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soontobeslendergirl · 19/07/2013 09:51

I was listening to my two (13 and almost 12) outside with a group of friends trying to decide what to do. The eldest of group (but the smallest) says "how about a game of Piggy in the middle?" to which another of the boys replies with a sneer "mate, what are we? like 5 or something?" so, first boy tries again, "well, hide and seek then?" to which they all go "Yeah!! great!" and all rush off round the estate. :o

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dexter73 · 19/07/2013 09:32

That made me laugh Orchidlady!

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Orchidlady · 19/07/2013 08:48

All gone quiet on the camping front. throck We do know the farmers personally but I still worry, especially with this weather. flow you did make me laugh, saw a very similar exchange with DS older cousin, Same " Whasup?" "not much" sitting in our kitchen " I on me 5th pint m8" ( he has has a small glass of cider with dinner.) takes more than that man to affect me"

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TheOneWithTheHair · 18/07/2013 19:17

Ds1 doesn't do bravado but dd will. She's trying it on already and she's 9!

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flow4 · 18/07/2013 17:55

On the subject of boys and bravado... I once watched my DS1, then aged 13, on FB chat with an older boy... "Whatsup?" asked the other boy. "Not much" replied my DS from our sitting room, "Just at Joe's having a spliff"

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throckenholt · 18/07/2013 14:07

I think most farmers would be very wary unless they knew the kids personally - not many would want to risk their field accidentally catching fire at this time of the year. So the farmer excuse is probably valid anyway - did any of them actually talk to the farmer or just come up with the idea on their own ?

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soontobeslendergirl · 18/07/2013 10:53

Hmmm - think my kids must be angels. Boys age 13 and nearly 12. They've had the tent up all week in the back garden and had various friends over to spend the night in it. The worst we have had is talking a bit too loud and No2 son took his ipod out there but swears he never used it, just for the time. No fires, no alcohol, no drugs - just used up all the milk and cereal and bread.

I'd let them camp in a field if they asked, but I have the history of good behaviour to start from.

In your case, I think I wouldn't, if he wants to start with the back garden and prove himslef then maybe you could build up to that.

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Orchidlady · 18/07/2013 10:26

owl I know, I was especially worried about fire, considering the weather. choco I think you are right, they all full of bravado.

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Owllady · 18/07/2013 09:40

I live on agricultural land and I imagine the farmer might not be happy with the arrangement anyway it's pretty dangerous in the country at this time of year with all the activity
and randoms ponds in fields in the dark and storm drains and so on, cesspits! it's safer to be in the garden or on a proper site - regardless of drink and drugs :)

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chocoluvva · 18/07/2013 09:37

Some of his mates are probably secretly happier with this arrangement too.

Hope they have a good night and you have a quiet night.

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Orchidlady · 18/07/2013 09:15

Thanks for all your replies. I have had a good chat with him and calmly told him why I think this is not a good idea. He also promised that he had not tried drugs and was only showing off, I actually believe him he is a real worrier. I have suggested the camp in the garden thing we a just a few people he actually likes, we do have the room. I have given him the get out " farmer will not give permission" to save face with his mates.

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cory · 18/07/2013 09:03

It's not about what you would let a 13yo do, is it, but about what you would let the 13yo do? As in the one who is putting about silly boasts on facebook and seem desperate to impress other teens.

I'd be much happier with a real wildlife hike on the moors or something than this which just sounds like an excuse for a party, attracting all the out of control older teens around. And I absolutely would not throw a camper party in the garden for this boy, just now. It's not the camping that is the problem but his immaturity around his peers.