My beautiful 10yo DD & I had a heart to heart last night when she told me some of her friends are teasing her a bit about her lack of interest in style/fashion. (They are at a school with no uniform - Yr5)
We are quite out-doorsy kind of people - climbing, kayaking, walking, camping - so clothes for all of us tend to be about practicality - warm, waterproofing, layers etc. Her clothes for school mirror this a bit but are not just the practical stuff - more a mix of Next, Landsend, Hi-gear/Outdoor wear stuff and supermarket stuff.
My DD is beautiful (clearly 
) and she has been, up until now, quite happy with jeans, t-shirt, fleece and boots/trainers. As she said last night "Surely being able to put together a t-shirt and jeans that go is enough." She is not particularly interested in fashion and does not want to grow up and change (according to her).
I am not going to force her to get more "fashionable". I love the fact she thinks the other girls who are getting into it are just trying to grow up too quickly. But I do want to help her make clothes choices that she is comfortable with. Yes when climbing and kayaking you wear the right kit. But that if she wants she can wear stylish stuff too. But oh wise MNetters - I do not have a clue.
Not a scooby.
I am not fashion-savvy. I wear jeans, vests, v-necks with converse/Vans/Birkenstocks. Fairly classic in wardrobe- though I may have a bit of a teeny tiny quirk - like bright pink birkies or leopard print Vans to liven up the grey v-neck/black jeans. My nod to growing older is to not give two hoots about what people think about my wardrobe and to relish being able to afford cashmere jumpers now So my knowledge/interest in fashion is pretty low. non-existent Not sure if I have a single designer item in my wardrobe. Took me 3 years to bother to buy skinny-jeans.
So - help. Please? How can I guide her? Are there appropriate magazines we could look at? What (preferable on-line/mail-order) clothes ranges should we browse next time she needs some clothes (some stuff is getting a tad small so possible due some updating). Is Next OK? Or should I take her to John Lewis? Somewhere else?
Thank you in advance. My mum never helped me with this stuff just carried on giving me hand-me-downs and frumpy homemade dresses so I want to help her develop her own style and self-confidence.
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Please help me help 10 yo DD become more stylish....
HelloItsMeAgain · 19/01/2016 14:46
No sweet dresses, please! My two are a bit older now, but in Y5/6 of their non-uniform primary they lived in skinny jeans or combats. I’m another H&M fan for that sort of thing – and check out the boys’ tops too, which can be lovely (including some fab cotton-knit jumpers).
They're now well-trained in the art of charity shopping too
OP - you and your DD are coming across as rather sneery. 
Because I have little fashion sense and little fashion interest but want to prevent my DD suffering like I did?
I'm clueless about style and fashion so am delighted that my DD11 has a natural flair. I am very glad for you that your DD has a natural flair too. I am trying to help my DD gain the same. Hence me posting.
She's at an age where she likes to go shopping with friends. I drop them at the Trafford Centre and let them go off for a couple of hours. Maybe your DD could do that with a couple of her trendy friends? At 10yo? Yr5. Sorry no. My DD is not yet at that age.
Thank you for suggestions re Superdry and Zara. Not sure about the rest though. Sure DD will go shopping when she is a little older. But not at just turned 10.
You and DD came across as sneery with comments such as I love the fact she thinks the other girls who are getting into it are just trying to grow up too quickly
Surely it's just something they enjoy and are interested in just like your DD and mine enjoy sports and being outdoors?
You're not being pfb about not wanting your DD to shop with friends yet. I just thought it was a solution to your dislike of clothes shopping (which I share!). Enclosed shopping centre, mobile phone and some equally mature friends, look round a handful of shops whilst you have a mocha in Costa - great fun for them but maybe not just yet 
Seriously? She is ten. 
My dd likes clothes but to be more stylish???? she has years ahead! Or maybe its just me.
You don't sound sneary at all 
. No idea where that came from.
I don't think you need to overthink this or do lots of research. I'd just take her to H&M and let her pick a couple of things that catch her eye, working out while you do it which leggings/shoes they'd go with. And take it from there if she's interested.
DD is also not that fussed although she's 9 so perhaps it's yet to come. She has a couple of pairs of nice boots that give everything a bit of style and a nice military jacket from Monsoon that looks quite fashiony and it dresses things up without any effort. this one
It means she's got a couple of things that have a style and the rest she doesn't have to bother about.
Could you show her the Johnnie B catalogue and ask if any particular look appeals? and then recreate it from somewhere cheaper
My eldest dd is also 10, and at a non uniform school, she wears denim shorts with tights under, bright purple dr martens and usually band t shirts with a hoody or very fine knit cardi, she also wears converse/vans and occasionally nikes, when not wearing a band t shirt it's usually just a plain best under the hoodie/cardie, for parties she's started to refuse dresses now, it's really just nicer versions of the above but with biker boots and some jewellery and lipgloss, I get most of her stuff from H&M, also it's worth having a look in Zara, and sometimes river island has some nice bits in but you have to sift through the really grown up stuff... Oh and backpacks are big at our school, my girls have mi pacs and David and Goliath ones with a billion keyrings and small stuffed animals hanging off them....
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My dd would also not be shopping on her own just yet, she would buy pens and small keyrings also, our local big shopping center would be Westfield Stratford... Not gonna happen!
Ipaid the "I love the fact she thinks the other girls who are getting into it are just trying to grow up too quickly." could have come across as sneery if you read it into a criticism of the other girls. Accept that - but totally not meant that way.
What I mean was that I love that she did not let the teasing get to her - she knows where it is coming from - pre-teens trying to be more grown up (understandable - it is what happens) getting interested in what they look like/what they wear. She just thinks (wants) they should all still be playing chase and make-believe in the playground - to play. She said several times last night that she didn't want to grow up and stop playing. She is happy with the jeans and t-shirts attire. So I love that she hasn't let the comments "get" to her. Or send her on a "I must now stop chasing around with my brother and talking about Minecraft" and requesting the latest Tween magazine (whatever it is). And yes, to me, it hurts to see them interested in fashion. And maybe part of me has been resisting this part of her growing up to.
However, what I needed was advice on where to shop - and where to take her/what catalogues to show her - so that if/when she did start taking more of an interest both she and I have more of a clue. And I have had that, so thank you everyone. V appreciated.
And I do not her wanting to do what I did when I was about 11 - wear leg-warmers to hide the fact my jeans were not skinny. Yep, legwarmers up to my knees to hide the "flares" of my baby-ish, non-stylish jeans. shows age
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