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Style and beauty

Perceptions of curly hair

60 replies

greenteawithlemon · 20/04/2013 16:58

Feeling a bit bummed about my naturally curly mop.

Every time I go for an interview, I straighten it. I "tame" it with straighteners every day.

Every boyfriend I've had prefers it straight.

Sigh. Wish curly hair could be seen as sexy and professional in the same way as straight hair.

OP posts:
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VenusRising · 23/04/2013 21:49

I have wavy/curly hair and am always taken more seriously (which is reflected in how much money I earn) if my hair is straight.

Only occasionally do I let it loose and curly, and it does indeed look ratty after a few hours. I feel less professional with it, as is.

I think it's linked to racism, after all, black women spend huge money on Asian hair weaves and wigs to look Caucasian- just look at Michelle Obama- have you ever seen her with her hair au natural- NO! She relaxes it, and has a blow out.

It's pretty tragic, but it's true where I am: straight hair is seen as more masculine, and part of the working uniform, curly hair means that you're just not part of the working world- unless you're an artist or some such.

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daimbardiva · 23/04/2013 21:23

Ooh, this is inspiring/exciting. I really long to give up straightening and embrace my waves/curls but I just keep bottling out as I don't know how to cope with curls anymore...

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MedusaIsHavingABadHairDay · 23/04/2013 18:21

I've just given up the GHDs after years of abusing my naturally curly hair.
First week I hated my hair.. it looks wild and totally untameable. Week two.. I'm loving the freedom of it, it looks different every day and it is much easier to get to stay in clips and scrunch into a messy bun.

Colleages (school) have said it looks much nicer like this . DH on the other hand has barely noticed.. Grin but then I had an 80's perm when we met!
I am not straightening it again until my next trim (about 8 weeks) . Hoping it will be glorious and shiny by then:)

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kingbeat23 · 23/04/2013 16:07

Thank fuck for frizz eeze! I used to get grounded by my dad as he thought I hadn't brushed/washed my hair and I was a rag bag! ShockHmm

I'd like to get to a point where I don't have to use product. I'd like to have a Brazilian blow dry and just step out of the shower with straight hair but it costs fuck loads! Until the ghd's and product for lazy straight hair!

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SignoraStronza · 22/04/2013 00:29

With the help of every frizz eeze product going, have finally embraced my curly hair. Have even dyed it bright pink! When I was a teenager it was beautiful blonde ringlets. Then I had it all lopped into a pixie crop and grew back in a more tousled form. Dh loves my wild and wooly hair - is not keen when I come back from the hairdressers having had it blow dried straight.

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Llareggub · 22/04/2013 00:20

I blow dry my curly hair so I don't have to wash it every day. I don't blow it straight, but make it wavy rather than mentally frizzy. I love how my hair can be so versatile.

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OneFingerSjupesUpTheYoni · 21/04/2013 23:54

I'm naturally loose curly and used to straighten every day but since having ds almost 18 months ago i rarely do.

My hairdresser says my hair is in fantastic condition, the best it's been for years (i always used 'heat protection' things but apparently they didn't work all that well!) I love my hair when it's down and my curls are thick and high - not straggling at yhe sides.

My only problem is i wear my hair up 99.9% of the time and it does look frizzy but i just cba to deal with it especially being 24 weeks pregnant with dc3 ..

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kingbeat23 · 21/04/2013 23:37

I have really curly hair but straighten it as I'm a lazy bugger and I don't have to wash it all the time.

When its curly I don't brush it but after 2 days I start to get dreads.

Strangely all my girl friends love my curly hair and all my male friends (that do care) like it straight.

It's easier straight but I do love having a choice

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Ruprekt · 21/04/2013 22:13

I am a curly girl too.

Which products do you use to make the curls nice and soft?

I use mousse which gives it a crunchy texture so was looking for other options. SmileSmileSmile

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EleanorFarjeon · 21/04/2013 22:06

I have long curly hair, it's never occurred to me that it could look less professional. I work in a very male dominated profession. I always thought the reason I get gawped at in work situations is because I'm a rare female - maybe it's because of my untamed locks! I'm secretly very proud of it & get many nice comments.

I look ghastly with it dried straight, and about 10 years older.

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auldspinster · 21/04/2013 20:49

I spent years trying to blow dry my wavy hair but eventually decided to embrace the curls. I do wear it up for work but that's just because I have so much of it and it gets in my way.

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Jayne266 · 21/04/2013 18:39

I hate my curly hair and if it has to be curly (to give it a break from the straighteners) then I tie it up.

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bulletproofgerbil · 21/04/2013 18:05

I have straight, fine, lank hair and HATE it. I've always been really envious of you curly haired folk. It looks so thick and lush. My friend was like you OP and fought against her curls for years and years. I didn't realise just how curly hers was till, encouraged by a new hairdresser, she embraced her curls. I have never seen her look as fabulous as she does these days. If you know what Kate Humble from Autumn/Spring etc Watch on TV looks like, it's like that. My friend looks younger and more vibrant with her naturals curls. Just beautiful. And she says she wish she'd stopped working against it before. I know quite a few curly professional people. I don't think they look ungroomed or out of control one bit.

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Hanginggardenofboobylon · 21/04/2013 16:22

This is really interesting, I have dark blonde naturally curly hair and have at times had it very blonde. It has never occurred to me that it would be considered less professional or that it would be viewed negatively. I am a lawyer and spend a lot of time in court with a wig plonked on top of my 'big hair'! I don think it has ever come up as an issue, I do tie it back in a pony tail or French pleat most of the time, but I do go to court/meetings with it loose and I can't say anyone has ever commented negatively (that I know of!)

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bleedingheart · 21/04/2013 16:15

*strong not string!

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bleedingheart · 21/04/2013 16:13

A senior colleague once warned me that I'd never be taken seriously unless I straightened my hair. I can't straighten mine without it looking like frizzy straw, it has (or had before pregnancies) a super string curl.
I've never straightened it but I do wear it in a roll or pleat for interviews.
I try not to let perceptions bother me because I am common and matronly Wink

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MadBusLady · 21/04/2013 15:28

Greentea Stop straightening it! You need to get used to it curly and learn what works and what products to use to make the best of it. Curly hair can definitely look groomed and well-behaved with the right cut and treatment.

I do put my curly hair up if I want to look super-polished, but I'd do that if I had straight hair too.

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Bessie123 · 21/04/2013 15:23

girlonfire I think that is the point - curly hair can't often be 'well groomed'.

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BillStickersIsInnocent · 21/04/2013 15:20

HandsofaCrone your group sounds way cooler.

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BillStickersIsInnocent · 21/04/2013 15:19

Ages ago I read that curly or wavy hair looked unprofessional, so I bought some straighteners. They electrocuted me on first use. I took it as a sign and have been wavy ever since. Grin

That and having bare legs at work. What MUST people think of me.

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girlonfire · 21/04/2013 15:17

I have straight hair and have always envied women with curly hair. I think if curly hair is well groomed it looks gorgeous.

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HandsofaCrone · 21/04/2013 15:07

This has bought back memories of being at uni in the early 2000s. I lived on an all-girl floor in halls and we divided into two friendship groups pretty quickly. In one group the girls all had poker straight, dyed blonde hair, which they ironed to within an inch of its life every night before they went out (the smell of burning hair was rank!) In my group (the less cool group Grin) we all had curly or messy wavy hair and went to indie clubs instead of the meat market big clubs. Straight hair was definitely something to aspire to back then, if you wanted to be in.

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HilaryM · 21/04/2013 14:22

Love the idea of 'polka' straight hair...

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kerstina · 21/04/2013 13:08

I have wavy fine wavy hair but have always loved a natural straight look. I really envied my friends naturally polka straight hair. She looked like Vanessa Paradis. However she and lots of other people in the 80's decided to have tight curl perms. That included the boys Shock I was probably one of the few who had no desire to have a perm and was attracted to my then boyfriend because he had short hair not a permed mullet Grin
It is now fashionable to have shiny sleek hair but I think curly hair is becoming more covetable again judging by the babyliss curler thread.

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dontyouwantmebaby · 21/04/2013 11:48

this thread is a real eye-opener, as someone with long, straight hair (I wouldn't call it sleek!), I'd KILL to have natural curls. I really never knew that people with curly hair were thought of as 'unprofessional' or not groomed Shock

agree that fashions have a lot to answer for, I was aghast when I found out my 13yo niece with absolutely GORGEOUS naturally curly hair had been using straighteners! I cannot believe her mum let her but I'm not a mum to a teenage girl so what do I know. Don't follow the pack, be individual.

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