Tummy tuck question for those who've had one

[itdidntworkout]

I plan on getting one at the end of the year. My husband can take time off over Christmas to help with the children and the bank holidays will give me a few extra days recovery.

Realistically, how long will I be out of action? I expect to be in bed for two days and bending over for a while, but after 10 days or so, will I be okay to carry on close to normal? I need to be able to do the school in January and be able to hold a sports bag. I think I've read that it can take 6 weeks + to get back to normal activities, but for school runs and helping kids into and out of the car, will I be okay?

I can't have the op during the school term and I won't have anyone to help out.

Thanks.

[AThingInYourLife]

"when somebody is considering mutilating themselves that's very different."

Oh do fuck off, seriously.

I can't see myself ever having a TT because I am too afraid of the surgery.

But my body has already been "mutilated" 3 times to get my daughters out, and the damage is not purely cosmetic.

If I ever choose to get it fixed I will not be considering simplistic, patronising, ignorant shite such as your arguments on this thread when I make the decision.

[Krumbum]

There is OBVIOUSLY a difference if somebody is hsving surgery because of muscle separation etc that is causing them severe pain. And that would be offered on the nhs. And having a c section is completely different because it is medically necessary. would think that would be obvious?

[midori1999]

So it's Ok to have a tummy tuck, and get the associated cosmetic benefits if it's for a reason you think is good enough Krumbum? Or perhaps they should do the muscle repair and then stitch women back up leaving all the loose skin?

[midori1999]

and whilst your narrow minded views and use of language such as 'mutilation' doesn't bother me in the slightest, I can see why it would bother others, I don't think you could be more patronising to other women if you tried...

women really are their own worst enemy it seems... even those who call themselves feminists...

[bignutbrownhair]

I am really not one of the 'you should love yourself just the way you are' types, but whenever someone talks about cosmetic surgery, particularly a tummy tuck, I always think of this name:

Denise Hendry

Is it really worth the risk?

[AThingInYourLife]

"And having a c section is completely different because it is medically necessary. would think that would be obvious?"

Well whether they were necessary or not, they have banjaxed my body in a way that has left it ugly and broken.

I'm not in pain from muscle separation. But I'm not as strong as I used to be and it bothers me.

Probably not enough to have an operation I don't need, but god it's tempting when I look at midori's pictures.

[higgle]

Denise Hendry had liposuction performed by a Swedish doctor who perforated her bowel in several places. Once he realised there were problems he took his name off the medical register here and hot footed it back to Sweden, so the GMC could do nothing. If anyone is contemplating a TT very important to check the history and credentials of the surgeon. I think Midori's results look great but am very pleased I came through 2 enormous babies relatively unscathed as it is serious stuff.

[EightiesChick]

I have had several abdominal surgeries, and I don't think it's something you recover from quickly. So I can see the OP has made her mind up, but as others have said, don't take surgery like this lightly. You can't just think, 'Oh well, after 2 weeks I will just have to get on with it, so I'll probably be all right' - you may find you are just not capable of normal activity levels at that point. It is very serious stuff and not a risk I personally would take for appearance-based reasons only. I say that as someone who has significant scarring - I can tell you I would not have surgery purely to remove those.

I am interested in the mentions of tummy tuck surgery relieving back pain. Have people who've had this done found it has actually worked? I have regular back pain now which I assume has come from having had my abdominal muscles sliced through multiple times. I wouldn't have thought surgery could help with this, but maybe I'm wrong.

[valiumredhead]

eighties I imagine a trip to the physic would be the first stop.

[bignutbrownhair]

Ah yes it was liposuction not a tummy tuck, I just remember reading that she had wanted to get rid of excess fat on her tummy.

Anyway, I am sure that when Denise Hendry put her body in the hands of that doctor she did so in the good faith that he would look after her and wouldnt puncture her bowel and then sod off back to Sweden. She was the wife of a footballer, its not like she went for a dodgy cheapy package in eastern europe is it? The sad fact is that she died, leaving behind a husband and kids, as a result of uneccessary surgery.

[lowercase]

wiki defines mutilation as....

Mutilation or maiming is an act of physical injury that degrades the appearance or function of any living body, sometimes causing death.

Tummy tuck and breast surgeries both fall into this category.

[AThingInYourLife]

So does Caesarian section.

[Krumbum]

But there is a purpose for that.

[DunkyWhorey]

I just think its a real shame that this argument has turned the thread from a helpful one where a woman who is exercising informed choice is asking for tips for recovery, into something of a "feminist" debate.

Whilst I'm not saying its not a feminist issue, it certainly isn't exclusively one - you might want to spend some time on the weight loss forums and the weight loss surgery forums where anyone who has lost about 6-8 stones, man or woman, has this to consider, often on the NHS, often to put an end to skin infections and various other complications arising from loose saggy skin.

I'm sure the OP acknowledges that Krumbum and her sock puppet dissaprove, and have chosen to blame the patriarchy for this, but I do hope this doesn't hinder anyone from giving their experience and tips, allowing the OP to be forewarned, forarmed, and with realistic expectations about recovery and results.

[AThingInYourLife]

There may be a purpose for that (although not always one that meets your criteria) but regardless of the purpose the end is the same - stomach muscles that have been repeatedly sliced open and so no longer fulfil their function.

You can't tell me it's "natural" for my abdomen to look the way mine does.

Why would plastic surgery to correct something a previous operation put wrong be so objectionable?

My MIL had unnecessary surgery for cosmetic reasons after her mastectomy.

Would you argue that her wish to have her figure restored was unacceptable vanity?

What is so different about not wanting to look pregnant for the rest of your life after a CS?

[Yeahthatsnotgonnahappen]

I'll declare my COI straight away. I'm a surgeon and have worked in plastic surgery. First off, having dOne abdominoplasties they are big operations with extensive work done on all your abdomen. I felt real sympathy for my post op patients because I knew how much I had done so could well imagine how painful it was. I certainly wouldn't advise anyone to have unnecessary surgery.

But I don't think people should blithely over-rule the huge psychological impact that having an abdominoplasty has. Not all my patients were for muscle separation, the majority were for women and men who had lost a large amount of weight. These weren't people who were ping it to look like celebrities or to parade themselves on the beach (the scars can be quite significant and can't always be hidden). These were people who wanted a better body for themselves - so they could fit into clothes that fitted all of their bodies, not just their waist, so they could not be constantly reminded of how big they had been, so they didn't have to tuck their tummy into their pants. They did it for themselves, having been properly counselled wrt the risks.

I find it that people feel that they can just tell people how they should feel about their bodies and they should feel ashamed that they can't embrace this stereotype of earthy motherhood and are stupidly falling into a social construct. I give my patients the credit that they are not imbeciles.

And in case you think that my opinion is based on the fact that of course I would want women to undergo plastic surgery as its my job, I had training in plastic surgery but it is not my current (or intended) specialty. In my current job, the risks of elective surgery are much greater.

[BonnieBumble]

I haven't got down to my pre pregnancy weight yet and I have a feeling that when I do my tummy will not look pretty after two c-sections.

I will not have a tummy tuck I will just have to accept that bikinis are a thing of the past and accept that I'm not 21 anymore. I'm not completely averse to cosmetic surgery, I have had cosmetic dentistry. I just worry that it will make the ageing process more difficult to come to terms with. It isn't a particularly nice thought accepting that I no longer have a attractive body but we were always going to reach this stage at some point in our lives.

[AThingInYourLife]

Thanks Yeahthat - interesting perspective :)

[Krumbum]

Bonnie it is wonderful that you have chosen to not have surgery. But sad that you think your body is no longer attractive. Just because society says so does not make it true. Do you have a partner? Do they find your body attractive? Look at the positive points, not comparing it to a young model like body but looking at things that are nice. Does the skin feel soft to touch for example.
I'm not trying to attack the women that have surgery, far from it. But it is only an informed choice if we look at the real reasons why it is almost all women who have surgery, the culture that values women based on their looks and the seriousness of elective surgery. I'm against the people making money out of womens insecurities and I'm against patriarchy that makes women feel they should conform to looking a certain way. In a more equal society women would not choose to have cosmetic surgery, if the way a woman looked was not seen as so important and part of her worth. I realise that it is hard to fight against the feelings of inadequacy, I have them myself ofc! But surgery is the last straw. It is like foot binding and corseting which we see as barbaric now! The pursuit of acceptance in a patriarchical society goes too far when it mutilates the healthy bodies of women. It keeps women weak. It keeps men in power.

And Who are my sock puppets?

[midori1999]

Of course, let's not forget that men have cosmetic surgery too...

[Krumbum]

Irrelavant. It's a tiny minority. But the majority of men do not benefit from patriarchy either.

[Yeahthatsnotgonnahappen]

I think it's very much an overstatement to say that all these people are trying to fit a western ideal. I am not talking about already slim people who just want that extra little bit off but people who have proper 'matron's apron'. Where all their choices are made on the basis of a single aspect of their body. So have to wear oversized trousers in order to accommodate their tummies and can't wear full swimming costumes as its uncomfortable. Knickers that always have to sit a certain way to be comfortable. They don't rush out in midriff exposing tops but gain a certain, I don't know how to phrase it, but relief that they can get on with their life in its entirety. We don't give rock hard defined abdomens but trimmed ones.

Why is psychological pain so discredited in the west? Why should people just have to embrace this type of pain but physical pain is seen as a "legitimate" reason? My current patients undergo very risky operations (1 in 100 mortality) for physical pain and people are actively encouraged to have hip and knee replacements, with relatives and friends pushing them to have it with "you shouldn't have to put up with it!" but when it comes to people feeling genuine distress if it's about a physical aspect of your body then all of a sudden you're deemed as somehow lacking if you don't just embrace it. Physical pain in a lot of other cultures is seen as a weakness and people are discouraged from showing it - an extension of the "mustn't grumble". Surely if we were being truly inclusive we would accept that certain types of pain are important to different people and so long as everyone's going into surgery with eyes wide open then it's no ones business but the patients.

And breathe.

[AlpinePony]

Fantastic posts there from yeah.

To put it into real quantifiable figures, I had a 28" waist and 1.4kg of loose skin removed (no muscle repair). So if you have a 28" waist, try sticking a 1.5 litre coke bottle horizontally into the front of your knickers. How does it look?

[Krumbum]

People do take psychological pain seriously, and treat it through the proper channels ie cognitive behavioural therapy, counselling, possibly medication. Surgery isn't the answer.
When the psychological pain is caused by the huge amounts of negative pressure put on women to look a certain way, then conforming to it is not the way to solve it. You will still never feel happy, in a society that breeds self hatred.

[EmptyCrispPackets]

Surgery is the answer for some people.


Accept it.