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Four month sleep regression

51 replies

nightandthelight · 24/05/2016 07:46

DS will be 16 weeks on Thursday and for the last week his sleep has gone to pot, for example last night he slept fine till midnight but then was up every hour.

For a few weeks prior to this he had managed to wake only once or twice a night and it felt as though the worst was over but it's now worse than when he was a newborn.

Is there anything I can do to improve his sleep? He seems to be waking between sleep cycles and can't resettle himself. He has also developed an aversion to sleeping on his back. I have managed to sort out a side position in which if he rolls he goes onto his back rather than his front but he will then wake as soon as that happens.

His daytime naps are an issue too in that he will only nap in a moving pram, a moving car or in my arms (and even then only after a bit of a cry). I could live with that though if he was OK at night.

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s098 · 04/06/2016 10:14

She wasn't too bad after the last ones but she was really unhappy last night, screaming when picked up, screaming when put down, wouldn't feed , really high temp it was horrible. Shes a bit better today but not 100%
Oh no thats bad timing! Hopefully the train makes her sleepy

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Tumtitum · 04/06/2016 10:01

I always found that DD just screams and sleeps the afternoon after her injections then the next day is back to normal so don't worry! We have our 3rd lot (also late!) in a couple of weeks, the day before we have to take a train up to York! Confused

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s098 · 04/06/2016 09:21

After things were getting a bit better dd got a fever yesterday after from having her 3rd injections ( she them late because of short staff when she was originally booked in for them!) so we've had a bad night. Hoping it
won't have effected her sleep pattern now as naps and bedtime went out the window yesterday!

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Tumtitum · 03/06/2016 20:34

Yup that's with me holding her! SadI gave up after that, tried to feed her (whereupon she had a meltdown as I think her cold is bothering her plus she's clearly overtired) then started bath and bed time at 5.30.... Gave her a bottle of expressed milk which she guzzled! Hoped it might make her go to sleep but me and then DH when he got home still had to jiggle her until 7! And she's been awake twice since... ConfusedWineConfusedWineCakeCakeCakeChocolateChocolateChocolate

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MYA2016 · 03/06/2016 19:48

Is that with you holding her tum?

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nightandthelight · 03/06/2016 19:14

Oh tum that is awful. Have you managed to get her down for a nap this afternoon?

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Tumtitum · 03/06/2016 14:47

Oh my god she's already awake!! AngryAngry Sad

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Tumtitum · 03/06/2016 14:46

Oh my god she's already awake!! AngryAngry Sad

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Tumtitum · 03/06/2016 14:39

Argh, really losing my shut here!!! Just had to rock her to sleep, took an hour and I know if I put her down she will wake in half an hour and if I go downstairs she will wake with the light or the tv!! So just going to sit in a darkened room for at least the next hour as if she doesn't sleep for as long as I've bloody jiggled her I will definitely cry and have to poor myself a large glass of wine!!! A week or so ago we seemed to have some sort of routine going and it was only taking 15 mins to get her to sleep but all of a sudden it's bloody changed again and we're back to square one!! Sad apologies for the rant!!

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MYA2016 · 03/06/2016 12:46

I only introduced formula last week tum as I was so upset and exhausted. He only has those 2 feeds of it. It's not solved our problems but means that I feel a little less tied which that itself does wonders for sanity! (Went out for dinner with the girls last night wohoo)
The noseyness at nap times is annoying. I've had to stop answering my phone as if I do, he will wake and just stare at me the entire conversation till I hang up, then go back to sleep.
have to admit though it does make me laugh Grin

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Tumtitum · 03/06/2016 12:40

We're also going to start a bottle at bedtime as she's normally so overtired she doesn't feed well (and her weight has dipped again :( ). Going to be expressed milk at first but wondering more and more about introducing a bit of formula now and again...

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Tumtitum · 03/06/2016 12:38

Hmmm maybe I should start letting her take longer naps in my arms... I've been resisting as I don't want to create more bad habits but maybe some longer naps will break this overtired cycle we seem to be stuck in! Trouble is she's so bloody nosey id probably have to sit in her darkened nursery for two hours! Been meaning to download some audio books for some time, maybe this is the time!!! Wink

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MYA2016 · 03/06/2016 11:53

We have seen a slight improvement the last 2 nights.
He's gone down at 7.30 and woken at 11.30, 3, 6 and 8.
I've fed on every waking (formula at bedtime and 3am, breast at 11 and 6am)
This is still waking every 3 hours however it's a damn site better than every 30-60 mins that I had been dealing with.
The only thing I've changed in the last 2 days is his naps.
I was making him fit around my day but as he's so nosey this often meant he was going 3-4 hours between naps and then when he was napping it would be for 45 mins only.
I've read a few articles saying how bad this is for their night time sleep so I've made a real effort to stay in and get him to take good long naps (still in my arms of course).
It actually has helped. Yesterday he slept for 2.5 hours in the afternoon and as we speak he's sleeping on me and has been for almost 2 hours.
I never thought I'd be grateful for 3 hours of unbroken sleep but right now I'll take it! DS is 19 weeks now.
Op what was your night like? Was he up much?
Tum I also find when he wakes regularly that feeding to sleep is a no go. I have to rock usually for about 20 mins.
Hope you start seeing an improvement soon Flowers

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nightandthelight · 03/06/2016 10:36

Sorry to see you here tum :( We actually had a good night but only because we have given up and let DS sleep on his front.

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Tumtitum · 03/06/2016 09:34

Can I join the misery please? Confused DD is 16 weeks and sleep has been all over the place from about 12 weeks! Last night we were up every 1.5 hours and she didn't even want feeding half the time so my fail safe back to sleep trick wasn't working!! Sad how's everyone else doing?

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nightandthelight · 01/06/2016 16:34

Feeling better thanks MYA, have managed to get DS to nap well today so am hoping tonight will be better. He didn't nap yesterday afternoon which resulted in a meltdown at bedtime which can't have helped the situation!

Sorry to hear that the HV didn't have any concrete advice. Hope the not feeding to sleep helps. I am going to try to put DS in the cot awake tonight in the hope that improves things.

Keeping fx that everyone has a decent night!

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MYA2016 · 01/06/2016 14:41

Skipton lass sounds like you're having a mare too.
If ds starts refusing his one bottle a day (my only break) I think I will actually move out.

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MYA2016 · 01/06/2016 14:39

Are you feeling any better than this morning OP?

HV was ok - I pretty much just cried at her for 2 hours and told her that I am resenting everyone who sleeps at night and wish I could just have my old life back some days.
She's clearly labelled me with PND but is coming back next week to see how I am.
I do feel depressed but it's for no other reason than lack of sleep and absolute exhaustion as to trying to work out what the fuck is making him wake every 30-60 mins!
I absolutely love my baby with all my heart but no amount of love can make you feel good when you're surviving off 2-4 hours sleep a night.
HV was a good listener but not great for solutions. Anyway We've decided feeding to sleep all the time can't be helping so tonight I'm going for to try and feed him downstairs then do book upstairs and aim to teach him to settle back to sleep without rocking or feeding.
sounds so easy in theory but I know or won't be. Doesn't help that DH is so impatient at night he will instantly pick up and rock him and if he's not asleep in 20 seconds flat he's handed to me to feed him!

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Skiptonlass · 01/06/2016 12:31

Dh helps loads, but ds is breastfed and won't take a bottle any more. (Perhaps someone switched him with his evil twin at six months...)
I'm actually quite worried about him. I'm convinced there is a physical reason and I'm really frustrated that no one bloody listens! I think he has reflux and I think something is giving him low blood sugar - I regularly smell ketones on him. Baby clinic aren't interested as he's (just) in the growth curves.
The whole experience of pregnant and birth has left me feeling like a dumb vessel. I had hyperemesis and was told to put up with it I had crippling spd - put up with it. No other patient group would get told to shut up and deal with such discomfort (my teeth and throat are actually damaged and I still can't walk properly.) it's incredibly dispiriting.

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nightandthelight · 01/06/2016 12:05

Hope the HV has some advice MYA! Please let us know if she does. Poor DH had to leave me in tears this morning to go to work :(

Don't apologise Skipton you must be at breaking point. Hopefully your LO gets the hang of it soon. Such a shame that nothing works. Are you able to share nights with your OH at all?

I know what you mean about people not being bothered, I mentioned it to my HV and she expressed no interest whatsoever. I guess as it's just a phase there isn't much they can suggest!

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Skiptonlass · 01/06/2016 11:48

Sorry, didn't mean to do the competitive tiredness thing. It's exhausting- so huge sympathies from me to all of you who have non sleeping babies!
The change that's permanent is from baby sleep architecture (asleep unless needing something) to a more adult way of sleeping. They will all learn to sleep through from one sleep cycle to the next but when they do that varies hugely. Just like everything else I suppose. I could read when I was two but I was too uncoordinated to ride a bike until eight or nine. Sleep is similar - some kids get it right away, others take much longer. And as the very knowledgable FATEdestiny points out on another thread, learning to sleep isn't linear. Teething, development, illness etc can all impact it.
Try various things - it's all worth a shot. Try to work towards putting them down awake. We used to be able to but he will no longer do it. We did everything 'right' - good bedtime routine, not too long awake, down sleepy but awake and he was a crap sleeper but I was thinking , well he goes down awake. One day he will start to sleep longer, we've got the basics...and then two months ago it all stopped working.
We've asked for help from our doctor - she suggested controlled crying. We tried it. It didn't work. No one else seems particularly bothered to be honest. In some ways the worst thing about this is feeling like no one cares or listens at all.
Anyway, I'm moaning, sorry. Hoping you all get a bit of kip soon

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MYA2016 · 01/06/2016 10:14

I didn't, OP! up 7 times last night, 9 the night before.
Have called my health visitor this morning in tears and she's coming to see me this morning.
Starting to feel very depressed now 7 weeks in.

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nightandthelight · 01/06/2016 05:23

Awful night, awake every 30-60 mins. Sleeping on his side is no longer working :( Hope everyone else had better nights!

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Casablanca78 · 31/05/2016 20:03

Skiptonlass - Sad. Sad to hear someone has it even worse, feel bad for moaning as you must be even more exhausted. Kids, who'd have em eh?!

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nightandthelight · 31/05/2016 19:56

Oh Skipton that is awful! Are there any professionals you could consult? The permanent changes thing is worrying, do you know what people should do to avoid bad habits? Flowers

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