PUPD for 2 1/2 hours!!!

[loaderloader]

...and all I have is a massively overtired miserable baby. Does this really work? Grateful for any experience or advice.

DS2 is 6 mnths. Was in our room until last week and typically in our bed. Generally breastfeeds to sleep day or night.

I need to get him to sleep in his cot and to take naps without me lying with him for half an hour as I'm not meeting DS1's needs at the moment. I want to do this as gently as possible, esp as he's so used to being beside/on me.

I'm currently breastfeeding him as was worried he might be dehydrated after the last couple of hours of crying. Seems so harsh to start the rigmarole of putting him down again but unfair not to given the last 2 hours.

So... Does pupd work?Is 2 1/2 hours too long and a sign it wont work? It feels like a tortuous routine for him.

Have just put him down asleep so put him through all those tears for nothing. And will have to wake him in 50 mins for school pick up.

[mrsmugoo]

PUPD was an absolute disaster for mine - it worked him up to a hysterical rage because he couldn't work out why he kept being messed with by being picked up and put down continually. It was just too stimulating.

My own version of controlled crying worked so much better for him - when he was just left to get on with it himself he grizzled and grumped for about half an hour (the longest time) before finally working out how to settle himself.

Have never looked back.

(I did this at 4 months).

[mewkins]

Start pupd for night sleeps only - do what you usually do for naps until he gets the hang of it. For night sleeps it will be easier - they are tired and will go to sleep but it will be easier if he's had decent naps in the day.

[SleepyLambs]

As a sleep consultant, it's not a method I typically recommend to clients. I tried it myself with my oldest and it was a disaster too. Although it is typically viewed as a gentle method, I would say that it's more stressful on Mum and baby than methods typically considered less gentle.

[mewkins]

Hi Sleepy- think I agree! Although it worked with dd (now 4) it was stressful and hard work and I am sure I wound her up more by being next to her!

[SleepyLambs]

I would recommend the "sleep lady shuffle" over PUPD. Less stimulating for the baby with the constant picking up. My son literally screamed insanely for the few times I tried PUPD for the hour, probably more so than if I had done a CIO method.

[loaderloader]

I could not get at all how it was gentle. Felt horrible. Not sure I'd feel right doing it at night after trying it.

We reverted to cuddles and feeding today but with me putting him into his cot once asleep rather than sleeping alongside him. It means a lot less sleep for me at night than cosleeping but is hopefully the first step in a slower process to being able to put him to bed tired but not yet asleep. Not sure what the rest of that process is!

Its sad to give up the sleepy snuggles but I need to work it out.

[loaderloader]

Cross post. Off to Google the sleep lady shuffle. Sounds like a groovy dance.

[SpawningSalmon]

I am in the same boat OP.

SleepyLambs I think I need the Sleep Lady Shuffle too. I have Googled, but can't find any useful information. Would you please be able to outline the technique or link to some info. I am losing my mind with my 5 month old who has overnight decided to start refusing to be put to sleep. I don't know what to do with him.

[loaderloader]

I have to confess I wasn't taken with what little I could find. Seemed to be that you sit by while they cry so you haven't abandoned them.

It feels every technique I've found involves some element of teaching them they're not going to get the cuddle/comfort they are crying for so they might as well give up! I keep searching for something that feels more instinctive and, well, loving.

I never had to let DS1 cry, it feels rotten to do it very differently with DS2.

Are there any nice little tips, I don't know, like an extra special (magical!) teddy that they just love to happily cuddle to sleep??!!

[SpawningSalmon]

Ewan the Dream Sheep is the closest that I have come across to the magical teddy.

My DS still cries whether in my arms or not. He already seems to know and resist when it is bedtime.

[SpawningSalmon]

Sounds like Gradual Retreat, which is what I will probably end up doing (and did successfully and with minimal crying with DD) in about a month with DS or sooner if things don't improve soon

[MillionPramMiles]

PUPD was a disaster for us, dd simply became more and more worked up until she threw up whilst I held her in my arms.

Babies are different, you need to find what works for yours. For us it was a combination of dummy, comforter, white noise and (at 10 mths) cc to encourage dd to find one of the many dummies in the cot herself rather than crying for us to come and pop one back in.

Now at 2.7 dd still has the same comforter and white noise (and unfortunately still the dummy but you can't have everything...).

[SleepyLambs]

OP, you have to do what feels right for you and your family :) Every child is very different and there is a way that will feel right for you. Frequently a hybrid of techniques is needed.

IF sleep training is needed, and it frequently isn't, there is no such thing as "no cry" because babies and toddlers cry for a million reasons since it's their main way of communicating. They frequently cry just protesting any change i.e. "You used to hold me to fall asleep and now you want me to sleep in my cot. I would prefer to be held all the time." These cries are a lot different than cries for pain, hunger, overtired, anger etc.

Hope sleep improves for you soon! :)

[fanjobiscuits]

Pupd worked for us. If doing it I recommend getting the book and doing Internet research as it varies by age and it is very easy to get it slightly wrong