Vipers' nest? Come counter our hissy rep with your stories of Mumsnet Niceness

[HelenMumsnet]

Hello.

Well, it's been bit of a week, hasn't it?

And we don't know about you but we think it's time folks outside MN knew a bit more about the lovely side of Mumsnet. All this stuff about harridans and vipers' nests kinda feels a bit lopsided to us - and is certainly making us pull on our Uggs and want to redress the balance a bit.

We're really chuffed to see such kind words about MN on Talk at the moment and also to see blogs like MmeLindor's that focus so beautifully on the "other side" of Mumsnet.

But we also want to publish, for all the world and the odd tabloid journo to see, a kinda showcase/archive of all the Lovely & Nice Things Mumsnetters Have Done over the years. And we'd really like your help with that, please.

Obviously, we have lots of Mumsnet Loveliness in mind already: ranging from Woolly Hugs to the Christmas Appeal and including everything from the lost toy on Blackpool Pier to the small acts of kindness shown every day from one MNer to another in need of help, advice or support.

But we really want you to tell us, too, about the Lovely Things you've seen (or taken part in) on Mumsnet. Please post them here - with links to the threads if you possibly can.

We'll read them all and, when we've run out of tissues, we'll publish some of your favourites for all the world to see.

Oh, and here's a pic of (warm and lovely) nest of vipers, courtesy of the fab women behind Woolly Hugs, to kinda set the tone

[StrawberriesTasteLikeLipsDo]

I met some great friends through here. We call ourselves the wagoners an have been chatting since 2007! We have met and support each other.

Also the support shown to expat, trazzle and the teaset - the fact that calling a family the teaset garners recognition here.. Its all testimony to the fact that whilst no punches are pulled here, support is here when needed.

[Gerrof]

I think MN is so important especially in this modern world where a lot of people relocate every 5 minutes and can end up somewhere miles away from family and friends at an age where it is so difficult to meet new people.

I am very happy that my finding MN coincided with my moving miles away and going from a couple of close friendships to having nobody to talk to within a 4 hour drive.

[KeemaNaanAndCurryOn]

I've been on the receiving end of so much loveliness from Mumsnet, I hardly know where to begin.

When school first raised that they thought DS had problems and all the way through until he was ultimately diagnosed with Autism, the SEN support boards were absolutely wonderful and gave me so much support, it made what was a heartbreaking situation much easier to deal with.

The atrocious cunt who when my DH lost his job and I was too ill to work, sent me a Sainsburys's shop complete with a wine box. She doesn't even live in the same country as me.

The wonderfull MNers who donate to the xmas appeal. The presents for my children in some small way made what had been an awful year for them end on a brighter note.

The biggest thing was the support I got as I slowly went mad with a total breakdown from a long running thread here that supported me until I went into hospital I'm having a crisis moment to the thread where I was so scared I was going to harm myself, but people talked to me until I got through to the crisis team and the drugs kicked in. Is anyone there

That was a dark time and a very, very dark night. I don't know what I would have done without MNers that night.

I've done forums for years. Never have I found anywhere as supportive, caring and fun as Mumsnet. Never have I made so many friends as I have here. If I lost my MN friends, I'd have to delete half my facebook contacts, but they're not just virtual friends any more. They are living, breathing people who I meet up with and who are part of my life.

MN also brought to me my bezzie mate EverybodyKnows. So for that alone, I love MN.

[drfayray]

When my ex left me and I just wanted to die, MN saved me. The wonderful support from women going through the same thing was so helpful. The kindness and advice as well as the laughs.
Give me vipers any day

[snice]

Everyone else has linked to lots of other great threads but what I would like to say in addition is that I think MN has made me a nicer,more tolerant person. It gives me unparalleled access to women from all walks of life with all sorts of dilemmas and challenges that wouldn't have crossed my radar otherwise. I think reading about their lives has forced me to face up to the fact that some of my beliefs and opinions were nonsense!

[Gerrof]

What was that story where a mumsnetter was stuck in Italy (or somewhere) because of the Icelandic dust cloud and she moaned about it on mumsnet, and a mumsnetter put her and her kids up for a week or so?

And even though it was a troll, it is very kind to think that someone put themselves out enough to take some clean knickers to someone who shat themselves in the loo at Waterloo station.

[snice]

Everyone else has linked to lots of other great threads but what I would like to say in addition is that I think MN has made me a nicer,more tolerant person. It gives me unparalleled access to women from all walks of life with all sorts of dilemmas and challenges that wouldn't have crossed my radar otherwise. I think reading about their lives has forced me to face up to the fact that some of my beliefs and opinions were nonsense!

[snice]

I felt so strongly I said it twice!

[Gerrof]

drfay your thread was inspirational.

And agree snice MN has made me a nicer person. I have no knowledge of SN children (for example) in RL and what people have to deal with day to day, MN has been a real eye opener in that regard.

[EsmeWeatherwax]

Here you go positive press right there! This is the February Baby Bus of 2012, and we all have 40 odd new best friends thanks to Mumsnet!

[melliebobs]

And a fantastic 1st birthday it was too!

[ThePskettiIncident]

Southsea's amazing threads in pregnancy. Her waters broke at 28 weeks whilst on holiday in America. MN kept her company while she was stuck in bed overseas for months. It was incredible to read the advice and support offered.

Lots of the others have been mentioned. The recent de cluttering/ house cleaning one really stuck with me.

[5madthings]

Oooh ooh oh the Nananaps threw ads, her first one was done under another name, andhow she shared the shock of being pregnant and the stress and worry and anxiousness she felt having had multiple miscarriages. The hand holding along the way as each s an showed a bean and a heartbeat etc and finally the birth if her baby boy :)

I was honored she shared her journey and I know it gave a lot of mnetters hope that miracles happen against all odds. And I know Nana appreciated the hand holding :)

[5madthings]

Threads..not threw ads!

[ScrambledSmegs]

I think MN is fab. It's broadened my mind and made me open to new experiences (except on Friday nights, no way jose) and I feel like it's made me a better person. Weirdly I'm more trusting, not less, despite some less than genuine posters.

The most lovely thread I've seen recently is one I can't/won't link to, but that actually is another reason I love MN. You've set up a special section for sensitive threads, and made it unsearchable. Recognising the need for that, and the fact that it's respected as a safe area is fantastic.

I had so much support from some lovely people over on the conception boards, especially when we received some news that we thought meant no more children for us (luckily we beat the odds). One lovely MNer sent me a load of washable nappies for DD2. I've also gone to collect a maternity dress from central London to send to an MNer elsewhere in the country, when she couldn't find it in a store nearer to here.

It's the little things that add up to a kind, supportive, wonderful whole.

[5madthings]

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/miscarriage/1488636-Holy-mother-of-CRAP-this-was-defo-NOT-part-of-my-plans-what-the-jeff-do-i-do

This was nananaps original thread, but she was called nosleepwithworry then :)

[Wishiwasanheiress]

I've posted under 2 names. One for each dd. With dd1 in 2010 I was floundering as a new mum. There were many times where without the advice from those in "feed the world - bf/bottle" I would have been quite lost. My first birth was awful and I was in shock for weeks and overwhelmed and felt truly sorry for myself the support advice and faith I received from others that I could do it, would do it was immense. I can't speak for others but having someone available 24/7 saved my bacon. I'm sure I'd have been pnd without them.

With dd2 recently I've posted all over the shop in response to others and my own questions. I hope ive helped others as ive been helped in the past. Mn broadens my views, keeps me current and educates me.

Those who only see negatives have very small minds. Plainly why they only see the bad. There's an awful lot of good here. And I'm very grateful to it.

[ParsingFancy]

Here's one of the recent life-saving threads: Heart attack symptoms? Or just me being silly...?

Hope wrinklyraisin won't mind me posting it. And I know TheHumanCatapult ("the MNer who couldn't pee") was another life saved by MN.

I'm mostly housebound from M.E./CFS and when I found MN was mostly bed-and-sofa-bound. So MN has been a lifesaver for me in a different way. It's my window on the world. I post little, as have limited energy, but read very much more. It's helped me keep in touch with what being human means, which can easily sink from sight when you're alone with your failing body for days on end.

[Hassled]

What Snice said - I'm also a much nicer, more tolerant person than I ever used to be, and it's because MN has given me the opportunity to see the bigger picture. It's given me perspective on life.

It's also given me the only chances I've ever really had to talk about the loss of my parents. When I got to the age my mother was when she died, I had a bit of a wobble - and the kindness and compassion and understanding that was just given to me (and it did feel like a gift) by random internet strangers meant a huge amount.

[5madthings]

There was also a thread ages ago where lots of us shared stories of pnd and how we had got well again to help others. I don't remember where it was posted and I think I was on there as 4madboys I didn't start the thread tho.

[ExitPursuedByYoniBear]

Agree with snice and Hassled

I love you all

[Ledkr]

When my baby was born with a cleft palate became jaundiced and developed pneumonia I was terrified she would die and stayed with her every second.
When she was about two weeks old I left her on the hospital for one night with dh and came home to shower and sleep.
I felt so alone and desperate that I couldn't stop crying and posted on mn for support.
What I got back was support that I will never forget.
From just people sending their best wishes to knowledgable people who have me advice and reassurance.
I was able to rest and go back to the hospital ready to help her fight.
She is two now and people will seriously never know how dark I felt that night and how much their words helped me in the dead if night when everyone else was asleep.
Thank you so much.

[exoticfruits]

All these stories are lovely, and true. I personally have been helped by a poster.
Unfortunately there are the two sides and you can find plenty of the negative too.
I am somewhat haunted by a terrible story in 'bereavement' on Tuesday- as far as I know I was the only person to reply and the poster asked for her thread to be deleted- which was done. I so wish that she had got the replies and if she were to read this she would probably be in tears because she didn't get the wonderful support that people are saying they had. She posted early in the morning and poured her heart out. I only replied because I couldn't bear to see it ignored and then bumped it up in the hopes that someone more helpful would see it. I was so concerned I contacted MNHQ but there is nothing to be done. I feel that we let her down. Had MN been around when I was newly bereaved I am not sure that I would have used it for support, you could end up feeling more lonely and lost than you did in the first place.
I think there should be more demarcation between support and debate.
e.g. if a woman wants support on going back to work early she wants practical suggestions and not to be told that she shouldn't be going back to work. This doesn't mean that you can't have 'robust' debate - but in a different place.
Maybe MN has just grown so large that it is time to think of altering it slightly so that women can get support and have abstract arguments but not on the same thread.

[JakeBullet]

Several years ago when DS was about 3-4 he desperately wanted a Baby Annabel doll. Reluctant to spend a vast amount of money on a doll he would play with for about six months before abandoning I posted about it here for advice. A lovely MNer whose daughter had several Baby Annabel dolls...and was getting yet another for Xmas asked her DD if she would part with one of her old ones for DS and sent it to me. I sent her DD £5 back for some nice treats. DS is now 10 and we still have Baby Annabel although these days she sits in my room. Recently I decided to dress her up and bought her an outfit in the sale at the toy shop...she looks lovely and DS took a whole new interest (but don't tell him I've told you that)

So thank you to that lovely MNer, we have really enjoyed and appreciated the lovely doll and she is still loved seven years on.

I could name lots of lovely things about MN if I sit and think,

the time someone was suicidal and made a suicide attempt, MNers worked out where she lived, got her help and did a collection for her afterwards.

The time an MNer quite obviously had an ectopic pregnancy her doctors had missed.....everyone pushed her to go back....and we were right. Again there was a collection for her to help ease her recovery.

Missy whose husband had a heart transplant....had lots of support from the site and some money collected went towards a family holiday for them.

The Xmas parcel thing which I have never taken part in but keep meaning to.

The blankets which are crafted for MNers who have had to go through the death of a child.

All these things missed by the journalists.