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Secondary education

Parents evening..how would you feel if..

130 replies

seeker · 25/04/2013 08:59

....one of your child's key teachers said they couldn't attend parent's evening at all because it clashed with their own child's parents evening at another school?

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Yellowtip · 25/04/2013 13:13

seeker you said this was a key teacher! How is the Y7 Spanish teacher in a Kent school in any way a 'key teacher?

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seeker · 25/04/2013 13:22

Isn't it? I think MFL are very important. Don't you?

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seeker · 25/04/2013 13:23

Why would it be different for Kent? Hmm

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Picturesinthefirelight · 25/04/2013 13:26

Dh is a teacher. If events clash he has to miss our children's ones. However his school were good enough to allow him a morning off to go to a meeting to discuss difficulties/possible SEN ds was/is having.

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Yellowtip · 25/04/2013 14:20

It's a real stretch to call a Spanish teacher in Y7 'key'. Maths, English, Science and Form tutor are probably key (even though I've never booked in with the form tutors I have to say - I assume they'll let me know if there's a problem).

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seeker · 25/04/2013 14:45


Depends on how much importance you attach to MFL.

Frankly I think the whole parents' evening thing is a charade- but if I am going to do it, in year 7 I particularly want to speak to the people teaching my child subjects they haven't done before.

What was the Kent reference about by the way?
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JenaiMorris · 25/04/2013 15:42

Confused I think MFL is pretty key.

Actually I think they're all important.

If a child is doing well and enjoying a subject, even if it isn't one of the "important" ones, then hopefully it can spur them on to do better in the rest.

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bella65 · 25/04/2013 16:02

seeker- you are over-reacting.

As a teacher, I can tell you that most parents' evenings are a waste of time- the ones you need to see don't turn up and the rest well- there is little to say usually.

I work on the basis that if there is a problem with a child then a caring parent would have a handle on it anyway- surely you look at your child's exercise book and see the grades and quality of their work?

Assuming the answer to that is a 'yes' then you should be proactive and contact the school if you are worried. You don't have to wait for a parents' night to discuss progress- and you can usually assume that no news is good news.

Spanish is not a key subject- these are English, maths and science. MFL are not compulsory and many pupils drop them as soon as they can.

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seeker · 25/04/2013 16:17

Over reacting? in what way and where? I don't think I've actually "reacted" at all. Unless asking a question is "over reacting"!

And I find a teacher saying that MFL is not key because it's not compulsory and many kids drop is as soon as possible deeply depressing, to be honest. I spend a lot of time and effort both onhere and in real life defending state schools and state school teachers- that attitude does not help!

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JenaiMorris · 25/04/2013 16:20

MFL and ICT are the only subjects ds is doing well in right now.

I'm really glad we saw both teachers as otherwise we wouldn't have known and ds wouldn't have got the ringing endorsment (all the rest were less than great - other than art where although he's not talented or anything, he's made very, very good progress).

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secretscwirrels · 25/04/2013 16:22

Isn't year 7 the one where they don't actually know which child is which unless, as Hully says, they have killed someone? That's why you have to drag the child along with you.

The reason parents turn up at parents evenings is because of the bland computer generated rubbish that teachers put on reports. If they put one sentence which could show that they had any clue which child they were writing about it would be worth pages of generic flannel. Even if only to say that little Johnny was a pain in the neck.

JenaiMorris I love those names

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bella65 · 25/04/2013 16:25

sorry seeker but I can't quite see where your comment about defending state schools and state teachers fits into the posts?

The facts are that beyond a certain age MFL can be dropped. If that depresses you so be it. I didn't make the policy.


You ARE over reacting because you feel strongly enough to post on a forum about something which is a teeny teeny event in your child's education- one meeting with his teacher of Spanish, which if you wished you could reschedule at a mutually convenient time.

I dread to think how you may react if anything really important happens!

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seeker · 25/04/2013 16:29

Did you read any of my other posts on the thread? The ones about parents' evenings generally being a charade? And why I asked the question? Presumably not.

I do find it depressing that children can drop MFL in some schools. But actually, what I find more depressing is a teacher thinking the subject doesn't matter because it's not compulsory.

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TheOriginalSteamingNit · 25/04/2013 16:33

Well I feel strongly enough to post on a forum about all sorts of teeny teeny events in my children's education, my shopping, my food and my house, among others: I sort of thought that's what mumsnet was!

I think the consensus here was that none of us would sweat this one much, isn't it?

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JenaiMorris · 25/04/2013 16:43

Indeed Nit. Which isn't to undermine the importance of the lesser subjects like MFL.

I agree with seeker that it's pretty depressing for a teacher to only be bothered about "serious" subjects.

secret they are all genuine classmates of ds. Honest.

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TheOriginalSteamingNit · 25/04/2013 16:47

And I'm happy to say that none of my children's teachers have ever given the impression they think parents' evenings are 'a waste of time', or that as a 'caring parent' I ought to just know everything anyway! That is quite depressing.

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bella65 · 25/04/2013 17:00

what funny posts :) Of course teachers don't give the impression to you that parents' evenings are a waste of time. What on earth do you expect? But what they write anon on a forum is another matter entirely.


And seeker- you keep coming on here and posting things I haven't said. I never said that Spanish- or any other subject - didn't matter because it could be dropped. You make incorrect assumptions.

I did say that IMHO you are overreacting which is what several other posters have said upthread- they said they'd simply arrange the meeting at some other time.

Life's really too short to get your knickers in a twist over this- and I think you ought to have posted in the AIBU forum as that appears to be your drift.

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seeker · 25/04/2013 17:05

This is what you said "Spanish is not a key subject- these are English, maths and science. MFL are not compulsory and many pupils drop them as soon as they can"

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TheOriginalSteamingNit · 25/04/2013 17:08

No, Bella, I think that if you wanted to make posts telling people not to get their knickers in a twist etc, then you should go to AIBU, and find someone who is BU! This thread hasn't been ranty or anything approaching it, so don't try to make it something it isn't!

And I really do hope that my childrens' teachers - whatever they do or don't write on forums - don't work on the basis you do, that 'caring parents will have a handle' on everything!

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Yellowtip · 25/04/2013 17:29

The MFL thing was obviously my fault but in technical terms, Spanish is just not a 'key' subject. I'm all in favour of MFLs (but it would be nice if they could spark up the GCSE syllabus instead of this dreadful thing they've got now) but the fact that I am and others are still doesn't make it 'key'. So the OP was a bit dramatic.

At DS4's Y9 parent's evening three teachers weren't there, including Maths, but I've no doubt she had a good reason. Given the number of parents evenings through the year across all year groups it's hardly surprising that some staff can't make the occasional one. All parents were given the appropriate e-mail addresses and were encouraged to e-mail if they had any concerns. Seemed fine to me.

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JenaiMorris · 25/04/2013 17:48

One of the things with MFL in Y7 is that for most children, this will be the first time they've studied one in anger.

So as a parent, it's interesting to know how they're doing in comparison with all the others by upsidedown reading.

DS's French teacher was ace btw. He knew ds astonsihingly well, referred to lots of things that had happened in class and gave him the nicest kick up the arse I've ever seen. I luffs him.

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lljkk · 25/04/2013 18:04

In 3 weeks I'll be having first parent evening for DS in 3 yrs. Will be such a novelty I wouldn't grumble if some teachers aren't there.

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bella65 · 25/04/2013 21:05

There will always be reasons why teachers can't make it to the parents' evening. Illness, school trips, clashing meetings etc to name a few. It's not the end of the world. As a parent of 2 DCs I've gone to numerous parent nights and there is usually always one teacher who hasn't been able to make it as planned for some reason. It's really not a big deal because if you want to find out how your child is doing then you simply make an appt or email the teacher.

TOSN- I can't understand why you are being so cross really, when I am writing what is in fact the Truth! Most children are doing fine and most parents who look at their child's homework, school work, and talk to them know this and are quite happy. Some children need to have their parents made aware of any problems they are having, but I favour communicating with parents as and when this happens, not waiting for some date on the calendar when they have 5 minutes with a teacher. Equally any parent who is worried should contact the school and talk about their worries and not wait until parents' night.

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ShipwreckedAndComatose · 25/04/2013 21:22

I thought patent's evenings were part of the directed time set out by the Head.

This reason for missing it would certainly not hold in my school

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TheOriginalSteamingNit · 25/04/2013 21:54

Well, as long as we are dealing with objective Truth, ok!

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