Concerns about PE performance

[Jux]

DD has a problem with her leg, which is being investigated. She has seen a pediatric physio, a consultant and we are now waiting results of an MRI. Meanwhile, she has done almost no PE at school. Last term, though both her gp and the local physio said she should not do anything more than gentle walking or swimming, the school pushed her quite a lot so that she was putting a lot more stress on her leg than either our gp or physio had advised. The result was that, far from improving, her leg worsened.

The Consultant, because we have had difficulty getting the school to cooperate, has written a letter stating unequivocally that she should be allowed to do her gentle physio exercises during PE lessons and resting her leg as necessary.

The letter was taken to school and handed to the head of PE a couple of weeks ago. She said she would ensure all her staff saw a copy (though, tbh, she's been the worst vis a vis pushing dd into doing more than she should).

Today, dd's PE teacher has tried to make her play basketball, and has told her she should definitely play tomorrow "and see how she goes". Basketball! Running AND jumping!

Her HoY seems to be sympathetic, but doesn't seem to be able to do much with the PE staff; they come up with some compromise which isn't really that great so we have to then renegotiate when we have tried something for a couple of weeks and can say that it's demonstrably not helping. I think he probably just fobs us off.

The head of PE is hard to get to speak to, but we managed to get him when we got the Consultant's letter. I don't really want to speak to him, as I am likely to get very cross and gibber, or cry, or be beaten into submission and wind up agreeing to another of these bloody compromises.

What do I do? The school is good in pretty well every other way, and moving her is out of the question.

Sorry for the long screed.

[magentadreamer]

I am horrified! DD had knee problems in yr7, a simple note from me ensured she did not partake in PE. DD was allowed to go to the library and do homework for some sessions and in others DD acted as ref/lineswoman etc. Can you send DD with another note tomorrow and Email the Head of PE/HOY and Head stating that on medical grounds your DD is NOT to do PE until she has medical clearance and should the school insist on her being made to do PE against medical advice you will have to take the matter further or schedule her Physio appts during PE sessions. I'm really cross for you.

[happygardening]

Write to your head enclosing the letter from the consultant send it recorded/ registered post (the one you can track) explain the PE dept are ignoring it and say if this is not implemented immediately you will contact the chairman of the governors.

[Jux]

Thank you both.

The first time I contacted the HoY at the beginning of last term, I asked if she could just study in the library. He came back, having spoken to the PE lot with a compromise - that she act as ref/linesman. I agreed, but after a couple of,weeks I was back on the phone asking that she study in the library, but again no go.

We got a letter from our gp, excusing her from games. So she had to stand on the sidelines outside all through the winter. Standing is soooooo restful. It's so great standing still for an hour outside in November and December. remonstrating resulted in her being allowed to wear a coat and to carry a chair out.

The last 6-week PE thing has been something gymnastics which she can do mostly, so she has. She did the ballroom dancing 6-week last term too as that was pretty gentle on her leg (no jumping, stamping, running; nothing that jarred the joints/bones).

Sorry, I'm just elaborating without reason, and you've read quite enough!

I shall phone the bitchbully in the morning, and compose a letter to the Head, and her HoY.

[outofbodyexperience]

just call the ht and demand to know why their pe staff are going against the consultant's advice and making your dd's condition worsen. tell them you are furious that the consultant's advice has been disregarded and that you have advised dd to go to the library and not to pe at all, as the staff cannot be trusted not to make things worse. dd will NOT be taking part in basketball.

mention in passing that you will be seeking legal advice if the consultant's instructions are not followed. tell them that you have no option but for dd to do her physio at home, because the pe staff are incapable of following the consultant's advice.

that is, if you're sure that dd isn't just picking and choosing what she fancies doing. i imagine there's not much difference in the amount of jumping around between something or other gymnastics and basket ball....

[Jux]

I must admit, when dd had the X-ray and it came up normal, we did wonder if she was exaggerating things, only I'd seen her leg buckle under her quite often towards the end of the holidays.

The gymnastics she did were very basic, simple stretches, no jumping on a beam or anything like that, not even standing on one leg. I can't remember the dance she did, but it just involved some gentle turns, leg behind, turn, leg forward, type stuff. Even that hurt and she'd come home limping worse, but she felt hugely pressured, despite us writing notes etc. In both, she would just stop when it hurt and rest. She demonstrated the dance to the consultant who winced and shook her head, but it was all done by then; of the gymnastics, the consultant was more sanguine when dd demonstrated what she did, but told her not to do more than that.

Consultant was adamant about football and hockey being right out, and other sports of that ilk, which I think would include basketball.

The PE head has been horridly sarcastic to dd whenever they pass in a corridor or dd passes the office when the bb dear woman is in, which I think is uncalled for. DD doesn't want me to write any more, as then she has to hand it to the woman, whereas if I phone dd doesn't have to go anywhere near her.

I'll phone everyone in the morning.

[EdithWeston]

Depending on how the conversation goes, you might like to ask HoY or HT exactly what medical qualifications the PE teacher has which put his views shrewd of those of a consultant who has still not concluded necessary investigations? You might also like to enquire whether their insurance covers harm arising from an instruction given by staff which contradicts current individual medical advice. And how they would manage the community in the school should forced PE against medical orders lead to permanent disability in your DD? Would this be considered gross misconduct by the head of PE?

[Jux]

Edith, I will admit to much of that crossing my mind! I shall hold it in reserve, though, and bite my tongue for now. We should hear the results of the MRI any day now, but we've been told it may not show anything, but that that wouldn't mean there wasn't a problem. Her foot is sticking out at the wrong angle when she walks apparently, but I don't know whether it was always like that.

Ho hum, roll on tomorrow morning.

[marriedinwhite]

We had similar with our dd who had a pinned collar bone and the pe teacher thought she knew more than a consultant orthopaedic surgeon and ignored a letter from me setting out that advice in writing, ie, no PE. Not joining in gently, not being ref where one could be whacked by a stray ball but NO PE.

I did what I was supposed to: sent a letter at the advice of the office addressed to the head, spoke to the HOY when it didn't work, etc., etc., and ended up with a very upset daughter.

With hindsight, what I should have done was to get a "fit note" from the GP which declared my daughter fit for school with adjustments, ie, NO PE, no gentle joining in (it's a simple word now respected better by men and the courts when women don't want sex, but not very well understood by PE teachers in relation to PE imho). The fit note to be sent in with a covering letter to the head which explains dd will not do PE and if she does it is against medical advice and will compromise the school's health and safety responsibilities and will mean they will be liable for all medical bills and costs of tutoring in the event that dd is injured as a result. Having been through this I would also note that my daughter is keen to attend school and will be returning as soon as the head has confirmed, in writing, that the doctor's advice will be followed.

[EdithWeston]

Bite your tongue and do not explicitly threaten. But, sadly, sometimes the only way o get through to the insensitive is via "big guns".

But it will be worth pointing out that the school is making themselves vulnerable to legal claim, and that as your DD's condition is as yet not fully diagnosed, no-one can tell if exercise beyond the doctor's advice whether permanent harm would arise.

And say to will be coming in to make a full formal, complaint every time your DD is asked to do more PE than specified in the note, until such time as the medical need changes. Stress you wish that that would never be necessary, but if legal action ever did become necessary then you want there to be no doubt whatsoever where responsibility lies.

[Auntiestablishment]

I cannot believe this sort of thing still goes on. Why is it that PE teachers think they are above taking any notice of genuine medical problems. bad experiences of my own 20+ years ago

My view would be that your daughter should go to the library, not go anywhere near these bullying twats and you should insist that this is the only circumstance in which you will continue to send her to school.

I don't think you say how old she is but if she is old enough, give her a copy of the GP's letter and your letter to keep with her so she can (politely but firmly) remind any brainless, bullying idiot PE teacher that "forgets" and tries to tell her off that this is the arrangement and she is not permitted to do PE.

Your daughter is doing nothing wrong. I think actually, you've been mistaken in agreeing to any sort of compromise, but presumably you made the mistake of thinking that PE teachers are normal human beings rather than vile bullies . Now you have been disabused of that notion, just tell them that your daughter will not be attending PE lessons because the PE teachers wilfully ignore expert medical advice and you are exceptionally worried that they will bully her into doing herself even more damage. And stick to it.

God, this makes me so [angry.

[captainbarnacle]

"no more than gentle walking and swimming" and yet you have let her do a term of ballroom dancing and gymnastics?!

You are at fault for sending mixed messages and opting in and out of PE. If you and consultant meant no PE then that is what it should have been. Now, tbh, you look silly.

[happygardening]

Jux I don't believe you look either "silly" or "at fault."
I frequently advise pupils on the exercise versus injury particularly in relation to soft tissue injuries. It is exceedingly rare to be unable to to any kind of exercise; few injuries of this type benefit from immobility. Walking is good in fact usually beneficial as of course is swimming. I am not a PE teacher but I would have thought gentle gymnastics would not do any harm (assuming your not a olympic hopeful) and again ballroom dancing at a low level I would have thought would also not be harmful lets face it this is not Strictly Come Dancing. The OPs DD and the school were told "no jumping, stamping, running; nothing that jarred the joints/bones" so with common sense it must be possible to participate in both of those which damaging the existing injury.

[Jux]

When I first spoke to the school and agreed the compromise, we were still waiting for the X-ray, had had no particular instructions from even the gp. At that time, all I knew was that occasionally her leg buckled under her, occasionally she limped and occasionally it hurt. Exercise wasn't a demon then, but simply something to be done in moderation. So she did the dancing.

She did the gym because she was pressured into it, but was careful what she did.

DH has just spoken to HoY. He is going to make sure everyone in PE dept knows that she is to do her physio exercises. DH isn't very good at reporting phone conversations as he concentrates on what he's said himself, rather than what the other person has said. I suspect when we get the next 6-week period and the game changes we'll have the same conversation. We have another appt with the consultant in a fortnight, when we'll get the MRI results.

Thanks for all your advice. DH knows what you've all said, so he'll be making use of it if things don't change after his conversation this morning.