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A place for stay at home mums and dads to discuss life as a full-time parent.

SAHP

Stay at home dad's - any experiences to share

4 replies

Lucyannieamy · 17/04/2016 11:00

My husband and father of our 2 (DD 5, DS 3) is very seriously wanting to quit his job (secondary Geography teacher) and this will probably mean a time of him being the stay at home parent. DD is at school and DS is at nursery so he'll not have them in the day time, theoretically so he can work on thinking about what he wants to do next. I currently work short hours Tues and Fri so I can take DD to classes, which he'd take over, assuming work let me up my hours again. Financially it will be a push but ok as I earn more, but I'm worried more about the organisation, emotional side of the switch. I do a good 98% of all the planning, shopping, organising, laundry, sorting, all the banking and general thinking that goes on with running a house. Any ideas on how we switch to him taking this on? I'd say it would be unfair for me to be full time and still doing this. Anyone any experiences of this?

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TitsForBrains · 15/07/2016 12:39

My DH is the SAHP. It took a while for the work balance to correct itself after I went back to work full time. For quite a while, I also had issues with some of the standard of what he does but I had to get over myself and deal with it.
Now, it mostly works well. He does get a fair amount of stick from his family and friends about being a 'kept man'. This does upset/annoy him and we do a lot of reminding people that this is for the benefit of our DD and telling them to wind their neck in Smile

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Robdixon1984 · 15/07/2016 12:33

I'm new here and just spotted this - I am a stay at home dad to twins and have been doing it for around eight months. It's definitely important to be working together on all aspects.

Being at home is obviously hard work in itself but admittedly I take on most chores. However, my wife is a teacher so I recognise she brings home so much work too. We just try to do what we can to get by and communication is, of course, key to masking this work.

Just to mention, I've also started a blog on my life at home here: thetwindaddiary.blogspot.co.uk/

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limon · 19/06/2016 18:34

Just be very careful that from the outset you do switch and he takes over all housework and admin while he's at home and you're at work. I speak from bitter experience of being at work full time and getting the shitty end of the deal.

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NickyEds · 18/04/2016 18:15

Bumping for you op. My ten pence worth op(with no experience at all-I'm a SAHM!): why are you doing so much of the housework now? Obviously I don't know your dp but I'd be seriously concerned about trusting someone to go from 2%to 98% (which he should absolutely do if he gives up work without having the dc during the day)of the household "stuff". The worry is that you'd end up doing it all and the longer hours. So I suppose a starting point would be him taking over much more before the decision is made final? So he could take over all laundry now, then the banking etc until things are a bit more even?

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