I saw a thread this afternoon

[KemalsStilletto]

I was at the library this afternoon on the internet and I saw a thread, a very nasty one from someone called Rhianna about her sister. I unfortunately could not post on the thread from the library as I was supposed to be doing work on my webwise course and I'm not sure where it has gone, but Rhianna25 is my sister I am totally ashamed to say, and yes, I am the sister who is worried about conceiving. I am so upset someone I trusted to go to with my problems could be so damn nasty and I have been in tears since I saw the post. I would have replied there and then but had to go from course to docs and just got home now. I would like to thank all you wonderful mumsnetters who commented on what a witch she is. I just have to sort some things out and will be back to defend myself further in about an hour or so.

[shhhh]

KS you do sound happier today, I'm glad about this. You should do what you want to do and if that means holding back with babies then so be it...Things will fall into place once the time is right for you & your partner. You sound as though you have your head screwed on. Don't worry to much about the future with babies, just go with the flow, chill and enjoy making them .

[LittleMissNaughty]

It is quite normal to worry about whether you will be able to conceive, even if you don't plan to have a child right away. I felt the same way years before I planned to have children.

Definitely treat yourself to ice cream. You deserve it!

[KemalsStilletto]

I am in much higher spirits today. Can't nobody get me down! The cat was more attention seeking than a child, kept coming to be pampered while I was trying to do my laundry! My next door neighbour let the cat out to use the toilet before and it hasnt come back, so maybe gone back to it's rightful home hopefully. I hope its got nice owners because my neighbour cant keep it because it's fighting with her cats now, so someone will have to take it in or it will get hungry. I'm sure someone will, anyway. I'm wondering whether I should go to asda to get some ice cream to accompany tonights big brother??? hmm, means me getting dressed coz I just had a shower, but it will be awfully tasty! Just to put the record straight too, I'm not desperate for a baby at this moment in time, because I would rather be financially, physically and mentally stable and have my own home in a rural location to be able to support a child the best I can and i'm not all of the above right now so I am perfectly happy to wait until my partner and I are stable, I was just concerned about whether I will ever have a child of my very own, but i'm not in any rush right now and neither is my partner.

[LittleMissNaughty]

You sound in much higher spirits today. I really felt for you having to read what your sister wrote.

As for the cat, I think it's a good idea to give her to your next door neighbour. At least you can go and visit her whenever you want. My cat is a pain. Since having dd, she competes for attention and wakes me up at 4 every morning, which also wakes up dd. Grrr!

[KemalsStilletto]

Hi guys, thanks for all your continued support...wonderful to know I have such nice friends on Mumsnet. Today has been ok, haven't spoken to her since having a huge row when she came home yesterday. She then went off to her boyfriends and havent seen her since so I just got on with my ironing today and just finished now! We also had a cute young cat miaowing at the window. The dogs went mad so I locked them away and let the cat in. It looks like the cat perhaps had kittens recently and has been abandoned by its owner because the cat was lactating and obviously in some discomfort becuase the milk wasnt going anywhere. I phoned the RSPCA and they said they wouldnt come for it and I dont drive so couldnt take it but gave her some water and some milk and then took her round the neighbours to see if she was theres. One man was acting all suspicious and probably did abandon her and her kittens but I coulnt prove it so I took her home and the next door neighbour, who loves cats, took her in for me and I keep going round to check on her. She's lovely - so friendly and bonny! If I didnt have the dogs I would keep her but my dogs happiness comes first and one of them would eat the cat!!!, the other got boxed by the cat around the ears and i'm not having no intruder cat boxing the dogs, but she is soooo lovely !!!

[LittleMissNaughty]

How are you feeling today KS?

[shhhh]

fimbelle, this thread was created after the "nasty" one. The "nasty" one was deleted by mnhq later on yesterday. HTH.

[shhhh]

KS, I also saw the thread and posted on it..Like others I wanted to voice my opinion to her bacause she thought she was so right in voicing hers. Everyone has the right to freedom of speech, but not in the way she did. In fact as soon as I posted I also emailed MNHQ to ask them to remove the thread as she was getting nasty.
Like others have said you sound lovely and I don't see what all the fuss is about, you wanting to have babies.
I wanted to have babies since I was a baby myself (!!) and dh & I started trying when I was 22..it took us 4 years and 2 mc's to finally get our dreams answered, our dd is now 11 weeks old and adorable. You are going to be concerned and worried if it's taking you longer than you expect to conceive but remember everyone is different...Some fall pregnant at the drop of a hat, other take years. Some carry full term without any problems while standing on their heads, others sadly mc while wrapped in cotton wool. Life is strange.
remember, we have very little control over what happens in life all we can do is to live it the best we can.
Keep smiling because you never know whats around the corner .
Goodluck xx

[ABow]

I saw the thread sweetheart, and if its any consolation there were lots and lots of nice things said in support of you

[Gobbledigook]

Wow - the thread was so hideous I thought it could be nothing but an attempt at a wind up. So sorry KS - you sound like a lovely, sensible and happy person and wish you all the luck in the world

[Catsmother]

Hi ... I added to that thread too, even though I thought it might be a troll, I couldn't resist. It was the comments about hardly drinking and not smoking at all that particularly made me laugh .... how shallow must she be to judge you adversely on that basis ! She'd hate me then ...

I've got an awful arrogant sister too, and haven't spoken to her now for more than 4 years. It makes family occasions difficult, but I used to get so stressed out at the stuff she used to say and the attitude - I'm much happier now I don't have to put up with the crap she used to feel free to dole out, knowing that the rest of us were too polite to remonstrate with her and spoil a "happy" occasion.

I digress .... there is nothing wrong in having maternal feelings at any adult age. I wanted a baby from about the age you are now, had DS at 25 & DD at 38. Hope things work out for you in that respect ....

You know, I got the impression that your sister is actually jealous of you because you know what you want and are happy with the lifestyle choices you're making. Despite what she said, don't think the same can be said of her, so she derrides you instead .... even though she's the older sister, that's terribly immature as I'm sure you realise.

Well, you can hold your head up high and ignore her - if the opinions of a load of strangers are anything to go by.

[lucy5]

I am so sorry that this was your sister, I was sure it was a male troll. What she has done is awful, she clearly has problems. I wish you all the best in whatever you do and am truly sorry for fuelling the fire by posting on that thread. She just made me so angry attacking someone so publicly.

[Hattie05]

I am sorry to see that you saw the thread, and that your sister is so harsh to you about this.
I suspected this was the case and is the reason i suggested we did not post on it.

At least your sister had not satisfaction in anyone agreeing with her.

[MrsBubsDeVere]

To be honest, I sometimes think that there are more bad people out there than good,but then, I look at the friends I have got and the couple of close friends I have made on here and realise that there are a few diamonds.

I am sorry that you have been hurt and betrayed, I know EXACTLY what you are going through, my own brother and sisters did it to me 4 years ago, I have not spoken to them since and never will do again, even though one is an alcoholic and apparantely very ill and one lives down the road from me.

You have a new set of friends and your faith now, you don't really need such jealous and spiteful people in your life.

Good Luck in dealing with her.

[KemalsStilletto]

aww bunnyboo, good luck with your pregnancy! hope all goes well xxx

[KemalsStilletto]

it must have been her as she is the only one I talked to yesterday about my worries, apart from ppl on here and they dont even know my name, let alone hers!

[BunnyBoo]

I can not actually believe that that really is someones sister what a nasty piece of work, sisters are suppost to be loyal and supportive and stick by there familys, i know many don't, but i don't think there was any need to come on here and start a very nasty thread.

I wish you all the luck in the world KS trying to concieve and just remember we all chose different paths in life, i love kids and always have, i was never the party animal that my sister is but that was my choice. i fell pregnant at 19 and had my ds at 20 and i am now 23 and 16 weeks pregnant with number 2, i am more than happy and i love my life being a mum.
Don't listen to your sister she sounds extremly jealous of you at least you know what you want in life and where you want to be, goodluck hun x

[franke]

Are you sure it was your sister and not some poisonous imposter? I kind of hope this might be the case iykwim.

[LittleMissNaughty]

I read the thread your sister posted and felt really upset for you. It made me so angry!

My sister is a really nasty person too. She once threatened to kill me for no apparent reason. She sends me nasty text messages and would love it if everything went wrong for me.

She has always been jealous of me and my life, and I'm sure that is the case with you too.

You sound like a wonderful person and wish you good luck with conceiving.

[KemalsStilletto]

you mean a man?

[MrsGordonRamsay]

I was convinced that she was a bloke troll.

Shocking to discover that she isn't.

[KemalsStilletto]

Hi MrsGordonRamsay, yes I am the same person who went to church and really enjoyed it, I have made some nice new friends there.

I am glad I saw the post. Shows who I can and cannot trust to put my problem and worries onto. I told her I was worried and she thinks I should get a life? This is a baby I am talking about, something I do want. I actually am not so in a rush to get pregnant at this time but was worried that after several 'perhaps I am' situations, finding out I wasn't was worrying me to say the least and I was upset that when I had my chance, I had a termination and maybe I would never get the chance again.

In regards to my stepson. Well, what can I say? Koumi is the most wonderful little boy, he is funny, clever, brave and loving. How can anyone not ever want to be a part of his life given the chance? I am his mummy, maybe only part time and not his biological but I am what he calls his mummy and I am incredibly proud and blessed to be, and will continue to be as long as he and his brother want me to be in their lives.

As for my lifestyle...true, I don't drink, smoke weed or party every weekend, but i'm healthy and very happy and content, even more important, I am secure, not like some people who go posting nasty things on websites.

Thanks to all who did defend me, you are all wonderful, wonderful people and i'm so pleased to have people like you to help me out. Thanks to people who did reassure me on my post last night about me worrying about my fetility too - after reading your advice, I immedately relaxed and realised babies come with time and I was incredibly lucky to get pregnant immeditely with the first. I think you all are wonderful people, and thanks again, it's lovely to have people like mumsnetters

[mememum]

Hi KemalsStiletto. I did post on the thread and I know I shouldn't have and even given her the satisfacton but I had to say something! I engaged fingers on keyboard before my brain! I hope you can resolve things with your sister. Also I'd like to apologise for the comment I made regarding her not having children in the future. It was childish and shouldn't have been said.