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He wants too much

8 replies

Walkinthemud · 05/12/2023 19:57

Sorry, this is probably something that has been discussed before by someone else but I don’t really know who to talk to about this.
DH has a higher need for sex than I do. I guess it’s always been a bit like that but it feels like it’s getting worse. I am not ruling out that maybe I am the one causing the problem but there are times when I feel so “pressured” because I am worried about hurting him. He is a good husband and father and I love him to bits but I feel like I am frequently rejecting him even though we have sex twice a week.

We had a fight about it this morning before he had to leave for a work trip and I have been feeling guilty and anxious since because I haven’t heard a word
from him since he left 😔

I really don’t want to lose or hurt him, but I feel like his drive has increased over the last year and it’s causing issues. I’m embarrassed because I sometimes feel angry and resentful, and then so
guilty afterwards. And now I’m wondering if he’ll look for someone else while he is away even though I know that this is a stupid and intrusive thought.

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StrawberryWater · 05/12/2023 20:33

You have nothing to feel guilty about. He's being an arse. Yes competing sex drives can be an issue but they can be worked around and compromised on with the right communication.

All your Dh does is take. It seems he's only thinking of his needs rather than yours or both of yours together. I wonder if he's suddenly hit middle age in the last year and is trying to appear more virile.

Maybe tell him that if he didn't make you feel like an object and a piece of meat all the time then you'd be willing to talk about it properly. Either that or tell him to go and buy a sports car like other middle aged men suffering a crisis.

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Walkinthemud · 05/12/2023 21:42

He’s not a bad guy but unpleasant about this. Thank you

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ChanelNo19EDT · 05/12/2023 21:44

I'd finish it over that. Not what you want to hear but you're not his service dog to help him deal with his Horniness.

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Watchkeys · 05/12/2023 22:05

Walkinthemud · 05/12/2023 21:42

He’s not a bad guy but unpleasant about this. Thank you

Good guys don't pressure women into sex, or have fights about it and then go quiet. Nobody is 100% good or bad, but this is bad enough to show that he has no respect whatsoever for your feelings, when push comes to shove, and he favours his penis over your happiness.