What the fuck is this?? Does anyone have gmail and know anything about

[Helpmesolvethisahh]

Photo attached

My and my husband going through a tough time due to trust issues. I look through his iPad I’m not even going to deny it. I see this... clicked on the link and apparently it’s the “best dating site” according to google

What is google ads? Could it be an ad he has accidentally clicked on? Or would he have to type this in to the search?

[Onthedunes]

Does he have an I phone.
If so go to settings, scroll down to safari, click on it, then scroll down to the bottom and click on advanced.

This will show you all the website data, many do not delete this.

It looks to me he has been on this site but as others have said maybe by accident directed by an ad.

[blue30]

Yeah he has a problem there. You could confront him with something like “do you want all our friends to know I divorced you for being addicted to porn” but since this isn’t the first time odds are he’d fall back into it at some point.

[LiteraryType]

Agree with above, and collect evidence to ensure you are in a good position if it does come to divorce & financial settlement. Would he want his family, friends, work to know what he's doing? You haven't caused the breakdown of this relationship, he has, so needs to pay. Hard I know but why should you suffer? X

[RenascenceWoman]

Perhaps keep quiet for now and then you can keep checking the Activity. It's probably the thin end of a very thick wedge though. Porn escalates behaviour and desensitises "normal" sexual relationships.

[ConnieDoodle]

@blue30 i also got an add for a dating site yesterday on mumsnet!

@Helpmesolvethisahh what didnyou aay to him about looking at porn? Why did you feel the need previously to tell him youre ok with porn sites?

[Helpmesolvethisahh]

I have had a look this morning... yesterday while I was recovering in bed he was on “tube galore” lovely.

I’ve said I’m ok with porn whenever he’s working away or if I’m not in the mood but he’s literally on it while I’m downstairs with our 2 children. Yuk

[blue30]

I have a wonderful girlfriend and don’t do anything dodgy yet my ads have been full of dodgy dating sites this week.

[Helpmesolvethisahh]

@BackseatCookers .. I’m in Scotland so unfortunately we don’t have that, I looked into that before

[BackseatCookers]

Don't keep putting off having an STI text.

sh24.org.uk

Free, you can do it at home and they text you your results. No excuse not to!

It's so important and tbh from what you've said about your other half he could have been up to anything unprotected. He sounds like the kind of bloke who would say "it just happened" and they are the not the kind of blokes who always insist on using protection.

[Helpmesolvethisahh]

Ok, looks like this SHAG website is just a scam pop up thing going round. I can only hope he has clicked on it by mistake.

@EKGEMS yes have always used condoms on the rare occasions we have sex. I haven’t been checked for an STI, it is on my to do list, I’m just abit embarrassed about going to a clinic but I will get it done I’m the next couple of months

[EKGEMS]

Please tell me you are using condoms after the Thai massage fiasco? Have you been checked for any STI?

[Lockdownhair]

Well for those who say you get ads targeted at you for what you look at online: I keep receiving email ads into my personals section of my Gmail for Shag dating website. I have never looked at a dating website in my life! It looks like spam to me.

[chockaholic72]

I’m on gmail and I’m getting spammed by some kind of UK SHAG site at the moment. It’s relentless and I have no idea where it’s coming from. I’m single and have never clicked on anything remotely like that to set my cookies off.

[incognitomum]

I agree he sounds like he has an addictive personality.

Really feel for you OP. I hope you find the strength to escape.

[SliAnCroix]

You can only try for one. You can only be reasonable for one. Respectful for one. Faithful for one.

You cant make a relationship work on your own so dont feel guilty.


Im sure all of those times where it looked l8ke the couple werent trying hard enough, there was at least one not trying at all.

[GilbertMarkham]

he looks like shit after only sleeping 5 hours after another vodka binge.. yuk

The drinking alone would be reason to get rid of him.

Also he sounds like he might have an addictive sort of personality, you don't spunk (literally) two grand on cam girls if you don't.

Addictive personalities don't make for good partners esp if the compulsions are toward sex and alcohol, rather than eg exercise/sports.

[mamato3lads]

@Helpmesolvethisahh

You know he's lying. You'll drive yourself totally mad trying to figure all this out.

If he didn't have previous form i would say talk to him, find out more, put your mind at ease. Can't say that though as he DOES have form and so you are rightly suspicious and have fallen into that soul destroying trap of checking his internet history for clues. I spent months in that dark place.

Sending you strength

[GingerBeverage]

There's literally nothing you have said about him that makes him sound at all desirable as a partner except for his salary.
You're not paranoid. You're in a bad relationship with a drunken, lazy, lying cheat and you can choose to leave and be happy without him.

[Helpmesolvethisahh]

He told me he has a gmail account that he only uses for work.. his main email address is hotmail.

When I look on his gmail he has no emails.. so if it’s for work then surely there would be an email on it?

We have barely spoken today and he looks like shit after only sleeping 5 hours after another vodka binge.. yuk

[mamato3lads]

Fucking hell

I remember these days...checking every single internet history item and driving myself mad.

It's likely spam in his gmail account. Has he got a gmail account you know about ? If he has, get in there and take a look.

Honestly though if he has form for this, it will eat away and destroy you.

Regardless of how much digging you do and what you find, he will have an answer, an excuse, a lie all lined up.

[astrogirl99]

OP forget him- you need to figure out why you think you deserve somebody who betrayed you.

No one should be in a relationship like this... there are far better men out there.

Xx

[Helpmesolvethisahh]

Thanks for all of the advice.. it’s nice to see women who have went through this and have ended things and are now happy

I’ve read every message and will read them abit better later (currently homeschooling a 6 year old, ahh)

[Itsallgonewoowoo]

I remember the two hour phone fix/massage parlour thread. Yep, he visited her, he likes paying women for services, he won't change, it's what he likes.

[AgentJohnson]

At some point you are going to have to stop hiding in a relationship that is harming your MH. Waiting for the other shoe to drop is no way to live.

[JacobReesMogadishu]

Well with his history and the fact he's deleting his search history he's up to something. If he had nothing to hide he wouldn't be deleting.

You can finish things without finding any more proof. I don't think you need to actually find what website he's been on, it's irrelevant.