Not Facebook friends, not Instagram followers but real friends who you see, trust, confide in and who would be there for you if in trouble.
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Relationships
Composteleana ·
10/04/2017 22:39
1 very close friend that is like family - she's part of my family and I hers.
2 friends since school days that, although we don't see as much of each other these days, when we do it's like we've never been apart and we are always there for each other if needed.
My absolutely adored friend from uni days who has absolutely been there for me through thick and thin, despite living at opposite ends of the country. We don't see nearly enough of each other but that doesn't matter, we still have adjacent beds in the nursing home planned and plan how we'll sit in our nighties watching Hollyoaks and drinking gin.
One friend who I am less close to these days as her flakiness just got too much for me, but I still consider her a friend and I know in an emergency I could call on her as she could on me.
Another 2 who live far away, 1 who is a friend of longstanding and we used to be very close, working and even living together, but lives have gone in very different directions which makes me sad. I need to make more effort there. The other far away friend we go on holiday together once a year but don't see much of each other in between.
A few others I'm friendly with, maybe wouldn't confide in that much but am happy to spend time with.
I also have two sisters I'm very close to, they'd probably be my first port of call in a crisis, along with the first friend I mentioned. I lost my mum a few years back, she was my absolute best friend in the world, a lovely mum but also someone it was fun spending time with and whose company I really enjoyed. My friends were an amazing support during her illness and after she died. They also, along with my family, got me through a truly hideous breakup that I thought I'd never get over. I'm now very happily with someone else who I love very much, but he's not my 'best friend' like people say about their partners all the time. I understand that feeling but ultimately my friends have known me longer and seen more, they know where all the bodies are buried as it were.
Though of course my dog is my best friend and my one true love, goes without saying 
hollieberrie ·
10/04/2017 22:25
About 5, but only 1 who I see regularly, the rest we just WhatsApp chat as scattered all over the country. I've no family or Dp either.
My mum was my best friend and I miss her so very much (died unexpectedly couple of years ago)
Meetup groups have helped a lot though - joined a few in Jan and now have some casual local friends to do things with, meet for coffee etc. I'd recommend it to anyone feeling lonely. 
for those that do - it is very hard.
olderthanyouthink ·
10/04/2017 22:01
When this feels shitty
0-2
One who's feeling I hurt recently because I told her that I lost my only friend when my ex dumped me. She isn't speaking to me, and honestly there's little difference.
Another who never answers her phone and we don't have anything to talk about any more.
Neither of them are ever available to do stuff with me but manage to see each other and other people.
To me a proper friend is someone you can do stuff with, talk to about anything and nothing for ages.
I realised this weekend I could leave me voice box in my desk drawer and it wouldn't m make much of a difference
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wineusuallyhelps ·
10/04/2017 21:23
I've found this thread useful as my DH doesn't really have friends outside of work, as because of his job he hasn't had time or energy to keep up with people. He does have proper friends at work who he confides in, but I thought he was completely odd until I see on here that other people have few or no friends too
Why did you ask the question OP? It's an interesting subject.
I think I've become more savvy over the years about who are my real friends (as in, I can count on them) rather than those that are fun but when the chips are down, they wouldn't be there.
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