Hey ladies... so after going out for 2 beers then arriving home at 1.30 and laughing to his mate that he couldn't get in he's just packed some bags left his wedding ring and gone!
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Relationships
BBCNewsRave ·
24/03/2017 20:32
I've let her down with two unreliable fathers now
You haven't let her down; they have.
What you are doing is setting an example of how to deal with a complete tosser, and demonstrating that you don't have to put up with abusive men.
scallopsrgreat ·
24/03/2017 11:00
Oh wow! What a nasty man he is.
"We can be as amicable as you make it" - Be warned that means he can behave as he likes and you have to put up with it and gloss over it otherwise its your fault if it turns nasty. He won't ever behave reasonably and this will never be amicable. And it won't be your fault - no matter how much he tells you it is.
And I don't think it's solely the drugs that are making him like this. Drugs don't make someone abusive. He is an abusive man already - drugs or no drugs. For example blaming you for not cleaning enough? Why didn't he get off his lazy arse and clean? He's showing a deep-rooted sense of entitlement there that you are around to serve him. He shows that with sex too (although I hesitate to call it that).
Please don't hold on to any thoughts that if only he wasn't doing drugs everything would be alright because:
a) he won't stop doing drugs for a long long time - he'll have to sink a lot lower than this and he won't do it for you, or the children, or his family
b) he has a misogynist attitude regardless of the drug taking. That won't go away even if the drugs do. That's a whole other layer of change right there.
Be gentle on yourself and be careful. Get some professional advice about where you stand with money, the house, the children (Women's Aid or a solicitor - free hour/half hour; Rights of Women website; CAB etc). Call on your friends/family. Use MN. Most of all, be careful .
Notmyrealname85 ·
24/03/2017 10:42
I've just read this thread, you poor thing!!! I can't believe this stuff goes on - he's vile! Your heart will take a while to catch up to what your head already knows but you're overcoming the worst of it now.
JeffJarrett ·
24/03/2017 10:36
It's good to be busy and keep your mind off him, but make sure you aren't doing too much and burning yourself out. It will take its toll, especially if you're off your food.
Make sure you're looking after yourself
Lucyben14 ·
19/03/2017 21:22
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Neverknowing ·
19/03/2017 20:03
These are all good things. If he tries to see your DC before you're ready you have this as proof and if you need to call the police this will help. I know it sucks but you're doing so well 
Neverknowing ·
19/03/2017 19:22
Don't understand why his family would want him to see the kids without getting clean. Clearly they're aiding his habit!!
You're doing so well. You're in control and you decide when he sees the children
ofudginghell ·
19/03/2017 18:38
Good if he's realised his habit is not acceptable with his children.
I would tell his sister to stop messaging you updates.
You need a clear head and to focus on you and your dc not worrying what he's doing.
It's not fair on you or them.
Step back and let him willow in his own shit.
Not your circus,not your monkies as we say here on mn 
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