Regular posters (and lurkers!) on Relationships, what's your story?

[alembec]

So this forum and thread has been a total lifeline since my big fat Script OW LTB saga. And yes, all you regular posters called it right, from the beginning. Thank you all, for the before and I'm sure the after.

Can I ask you, what's your story? What made you become a regular here? How did you find this place and how has it helped you?

As for me, I discovered mumsnet for the Baby sleep threads (magic of a non sleeping baby), and stayed for the Relationships support!

[isseywithcats]

i was on a forum called vipers who were ebay members who had been banned from ebay discussion boards, one day someone mentioned this forum as in taking the micky out of the twee people on here, so i looked in and got hooked on AIBU, posted a lot on cat litter threads because i am massively into cats, as in i work as a volunteer for a cat rescue, foster, work in their shop etc,and over the last few years have contributed to threads, only one name cahnge as i dont have 6 cats any more, when i found out my exH was cheating came on here more to rant but had some good advice too, and seven years later still hooked on mumsnet

[RedTitsMcGinty]

Been on MN since I miscarried my first pregnancy in 2009. Stayed here when I had my DD IN 2010.

In Nov 2015 I found out that exDH was cheating - and lying very cruelly about it - and there was a lot of other horrible shit going on with him too that I don't even have the energy to type. I found this board inspirational and a lifeline even though I rarely post.

Our divorce was finalised before Christmas (just in time for my 6th wedding anniversary...). It's a year since exDH left and I am so content - even happy - with my life. ExDH is struggling but I actually take no joy in that. I'm finally reaching the indifference I'd hoped for. If anything, I feel sorry for him. Life for me is easier now and DD has settled into it well.

The usual story though - I never thought that exDH would cheat - but he did. And I knew exactly what to expect thanks to all the amazing women on here.

[AuntieStella]

I'm a regular on MN because I like it. I post a lot in a variety of topics, but navigate to them from 'Active'

I don't think you need a particular 'tale' to have things to say in this or any other topic.

[BumDNC]

I've been on and off for years.
LTR broke down many years ago I have 2 DC.
I came back when I decided to start dating again because most of my friends are married and I didn't have people to talk to.
I met someone lovely online 6m ago

[StrartinngfromHere]

Been on MN pretty much since it started (have had various names) first for baby related stuff, then school stuff and, from 2011 on when I found my exH was a serial cheat and a nasty EA abuser too, on the relationships boards.

MN has been a lifeline for me at times and the supportive common sense of women on here is something it is not easy to find in RL.

[MegFlyAway]

10 year relationship, 1 year marriage that ended when he had an emotional affair with a work colleague. Wish I'd know all the script information sooner as I would have played it very differently!

[nigelforgotthepassword]

littleredpear...and for everyone who is going through something that MN has been able to help with.
I get that it can be judge on here and sometimes a bit absurd.But I still feel it's a great place to come when you most need it.

[littleredpear]

I arrived on the site after I lost a large chunk of nipple a week out of hospital on the bf boards.

Misdiagnosed breast abscess and 4 ops later I trusted the ladies on here a lot more than the medical staff.

I stayed on S&B, I love shopping.

Next thing I find a picture of underwear on my husbands phone.

Boom.

20 years, 2 kids, a miscarriage, a cancer scare and a child abuse case later I'm getting support on here for my husbands EA with a colleague.

It's been a long 12 months, I never thought he would ever put us where we are now. He's ruined 20 years of happiness. He has no good reasons or explanations.

Here has been a lifeline. Counselling has been dead end after dead end.

This place stopped me exploding, probably saved me losing my job over his betrayal and helped me with understanding I can't ever know why he did it.

I still want to kill them both daily but at least this place has helped me not turn up on her doorstep to confront her.

I hope my experiences help others I guess.

[confusionoftheillusion]

Started posting and using during ExH violence, my subsequent affair, my divorce and now life with DP and our children.

Often gives me a reality check, interesting to see people's views but also incredibly stereotypical. I've learnt not to let MN rule my life as for a while it did and I'd believe MN over what I knew to be the truth in my life.

[tee4two]

I've been a long time lurker (since 2006), must have started because of pregnancy/young babies.
I did post on relationships this time (ish) last year.
Still stuck in the same position now, but came back to MN because I get strength from it. Everybody is so supportive, and knowledgeable. It helps me to see what kind of shite I've been putting up with, and what I need to do to deal with it.
I got the courage to phone WA last week, for information more than anything, because as long as I know the ins and outs of things, I can stand up for myself. I made that stand, and I'm 99% sure he's moving out. I won't do a little jig until the door closes behind him for the last time though.

[hellsbellsmelons]

I came over here when someone on WW discussion board mentioned it.
Been here ever since.
And now going through my own shite (again!)

[WarmFunKindStrong]

Joined in 2002 - frequent name changer. Joined during the early difficulties with my 2 (born to me) dc and before adopting my third. Sleep problems, marriage problems, divorce, dating, caring for elderly parents, troubled teens - MN has supported, advised, and enlightened me through so much. I have met and made RL friends with some MNers. I am immensely grateful to MN, it has really changed my life.

I post on relationships, part of the much maligned LTB brigade . Why should anyone continually try to make a seriously substandard relationship work? And usually their efforts are unilateral.

[spicelette1]

I originally came to Mumsnet when pregnant with DD1 in 2009, then over the years became a lurker on the relationships board. From reading the threads here I gradually became aware that my ex's behaviour was extremely EA. I'm generally perceived as a strong, confident woman, I was the main earner in the partnership and yet i was so ashamed to find myself in this position. I was an archetypal 'boiled frog'. Eventually I found out he was meeting people off sex sites and sleeping with them in the daytime in seedy hotels. This brought things to a head and he left soon after.

While I've only posted once, the Relationships board has enabled me to make sense of my experiences, otherwise i'd probably still be blaming myself for the failure of my marriage. Being gaslit and EA for years I felt I was going mad but I can now articulate what has happened to me and I'm hugely appreciative of the wise women who give advice and the brave women who share their stories.

Now it's more more than two years on. I recently amicably ended an eighteen month 'fling' that was just what i needed to help me get over my marriage, but was never going to be my happy ever after. So now I'm reading the dating threads in the hopes they will help me to find Mr Right.

[Christmasnoooooooooooo]

I started on forum lurking years ago on site called handbag that was given to me on cd ( does any one remember when they gave web suff on cd )I went to woman business thing my freind was doing . When that site went I moved to ivillage when that went I found mumsnet and started just before penis beaker. I Was so glad I never posted on that one as the person whose story I was going to ended up sharing the thread on their Facebook page .
So I now never write about other people and only post stuff that does identify and name change.

[Meelymoo80]

Joined after becoming pg with ex, he went nuts about the pregnancy and demanded I have an abortion. I was looking for similar stories to get my mind in order but then had a MC. He's still my ex happily and now I'm doing OLD again. Which is completely fucked up going well.

And I love reading the threads on dating as see myself in so many of them. Classics also made me laugh when I thought nothing would ever again. So I stayed and lurked until I posted this

[Jaysis]

My GP recommended it as a TTC /parenting website.

[ScruffyTheJanitor]

I came here years ago under a different name.
My then GF was pregnant and I looked for advice. We lost the baby, our relationship went south, I left MN.

I then came back when my wife was having an affair, I didn't post much but I read a lot. I blamed myself, I wondered what I'd done wrong. I tried to use advice here to shape myself into a better boyfriend and partner. Not that it helped, we divorced, I left MN.

Then I came back again, gf pregnant, looking for advice and such. Been here since.

I stay thanks to the advice, it allows me to see where I could improve and be the partner my gf deserves and the dad my DD needs.

It also opens my eyes to the amount of shit women put up with from arseholes. Don't get why women would get with a jackass and stay with a jackass though? It seems that answer still alludes me.

[MagpieWife]

I am a definite lurker and rarely post, but I check these threads at least every couple of days.

I've been married for a year (no kids yet), and am very happy so far - but having watched my parents divorce I know how difficult it is to keep a marriage together long term. I like coming on here to get an idea of the issues we might face, and to read all your advice on them!

I don't post much because being young I don't feel like I have much wisdom to impart, but I often think of posters' dilemmas and wish them well.

[everycloudandallthatjazz]

First came onto Mumsnet a few years ago when pregnant with DC1 with a relationship dilemma. Was told by around 100 people to LTB as he was controlling.

Got scared and deleted my MN replies.

Left my emotionally abusive relationship last year with my two DC and the support on here has been invaluable.

I have posted on and off for a few years but name change frequently.

[nigelforgotthepassword]

Came to MN when pg with dd2. Hovered about a bit but not in the site much for a few years.Returned and came to relationships when it transpired my then h had had an affair with my best friend. Advice and support here were invaluable.

[Imaginesthat]

Pretty much over it realised was nothing to do with me and all him

[alembec]

how do you feel 2 years on Imagine?

[Imaginesthat]

Something happened and I went through his whole phone found out everything . Child soon 3