My husband has good intentions I think, however his stubbornness is damaging out relationship and family dynamic.
We recently bought a new house that needs some work doing to it. We are living in the property which is just about live-able with 2 DCs. Before buying, we agreed that we would pay someone to do most of the work (we can afford to) and DH and I both have stressful jobs.
Fast forward to now. FIL has drummed it into DH that you "never" pay anyone to do a job that you can learn to do yourself. Therefore, DH has changed his mind on employing someone to do the work and has taken it all on himself on top of his stressful job, at Christmas time, with a young family to take care of and heap of other problems going on.
DH is learning as he goes so everything is taking much longer and the house is upside down. Anyone who visits frowns and says that DH has taken on more than he can handle. I'm fed up of the mess and the lack of time and attention from my DH towards me or the DCS. He's exhausted, his work is suffering, I'm suffering, DCS are suffering but he refuses to give up on the work. It's not doing him any good taking so much on himself. It's not just decorating either, it's big jobs like knocking out walls, plumbing, wiring, plastering and he refuses to back down. FIL is not helping either as he dips in and out helping DH where he can but keeps saying that he's "doing the right thing" by doing all this work himself.
We have no quality of life atm and this is why we go to work in the first place isn't it? To have some quality of life?
Everything has had to go on the back-burner, Xmas, friends, family, everything because he's so determined to do all of this work himself. I've no idea what to do.
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Relationships
Stubborn Husband not taking care of himself or families needs
chavatar · 10/12/2016 23:27
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