tradesman won't give my keys back

[chillyogawine]

I feel aggrieved. I had some work done in my house and gave a set of house keys to my builder chap. He came recommended via a friend, so thought he was trustworthy and also I work so can't be here all the time to let him in. Anyway while working for me, he started coming over familiar and flirty, it was clear what he wanted, we're all gown ups here, I don't need to spell it out. I was upset because although I am friendly and chatty, I'd given him no reason to think beyond that, plus Im married with three kids and he'd met my husband a few times! Anyway I was clear with him that he had overstepped the mark. I didn't tell my husband as I didn't want to cause any upset. He finished the job and we paid him but he left without giving me my house keys back and when i've asked him for them he says I have to come and get them.
He's clearly a weirdo. I've looked into changing the locks and as its 3 diff locks and I need several sets cut it's expensive and of course Inhale to tell my husband now, which is fine. I'm so annoyed. Is there any way to force him to give my keys back? I feel helpless and angry at how he's treated me and also worry he will do this to someone else. He's married by the way himself! Any advice or shall i just change the locks, block his number and draw a line under the whole experience!

[chillyogawine]

I did have a look around and can't see anything missing but he may have been through my stuff and I wouldn't know really. Makes me feel bit sick to think about it.
Swampster, he could be I guess! It gives tradesmen a bad name, am sure there are some good guys out there but this experience has made me a lot more suspicious!

[HelenaDove]

OP have you checked your things to see if anything is missing and if he has been anywhere he shouldnt.

[swampster]

What a tosser. Our Plumber From Hell did the same with our keys. Can't help wondering if it is the same guy.

[Lucy7400]

Just change the locks.

[QueenOfTheNaps]

I would go to the police, perhaps call the non emergency number?

I'd be reluctant to "send my husband round", firstly not all husbands are going to want to be confrontational and secondly this crazy man could do anything!!
My husband is big tall and strong (hubba hubba) and would love to have a row with a man who disrespected his delicate wife (ha!) but I would hate for him to go there in case this loon grabs a hammer or something who knows

[Walkacrossthesand]

What yuckyuck said - if any of the doors has more than one lock, and you always lock all of them, you only need to change one lock on that door to make any copies he has, useless.

[YuckYuckEwwww]

Definitely contact the police, they might not do anything but I don't think people behave like this as a once off, and if someone else reports sexual harassment or stalking from him your report will help.

Is it keys for 3 separate doors or 3 keys for a main door? Can you change just the main one?

[chillyogawine]

thanks for all the great advice, its been very helpful and also made me feel so much better about it. Felt like maybe I was making a big fuss but i feel 100% vindicated that I'm in the right and he's a nutter! Have a nice evening all x

[Joysmum]

I know you are changing the locks but I would report to local trading standards as well as 101. Even better if you have text proof.

[Ilovenannyplum]

100% change the locks even if you do get the keys back.
I wouldn't put it past him to copy himself a set.

As PP said, call 101. See what they say.

[helennotsomadnow]

I would ring 101 and ask for advice, tell them about his behaviour and that you have text from him, not sure what they would advise or do but its worth a go

[Wonkydonkey44]

Is he gas safe registered if he's a plumber?

What a creep and please change your locks 🔐 we were burgled 2 days after we had workmen in and I will never leave anyone let's again xx

[Ginkypig]

Im just popping out but wanted to say I'm sorry you're going through this chilly!
Good luck

[Ginkypig]

Yes I agree with getting the locks changed. you don't want the knowledge that he may have access to your house (even if you got them back)

Iv been in a similar but different situation (I was a child about 11/12 and he was an adult)
He knew where the spare key was (as a family friend) and let himself in I didn't hear him so the first I knew about it was seeing his face come round the living room door. It gave me the most scary realisation that had I been alone Anything could have happened (and probably would have)
By the time I knew he was in the house he was actually in the same room (in the doorway) I would have had no escape.

Looking back and knowing how dangerous he turned out to be (a whole other thread!) im very lucky really.

[chillyogawine]

is there a professional body for builders, well he's a plumber really. I couldn't find anything online? And he's not on checkatrade (now I know why!) and doesnt have a website or anything I could post a warning on.

[Craigie]

Phone the police. He sounds like a fucking weirdo.

[funnyandwittyusername]

It's not theft as you handed him the keys (in legal terms) as expensive as it is I would change the locks. You don't know if he's copied them and definitely complain to professional body if there is one

[0SometimesIWonder]

Report to the police and then text him the crime number - bet you'll get the keys back pdq.

[scotslass76]

I would report to the police. Scumbag has stolen your keys ffs.

[loveyoutothemoon]

Why change the locks? Get hold of him TODAY. I WOULD get my husband round.

[chillyogawine]

good idea re police, i wouldn't think they'd be interested but at least i'll have reported it in case he does anything weird again!
Will talk to DH and report the keys and get the locks changed anyway.
Feel sorry for his poor wife, married to such a low-life.

[GloriaGaynor]

You'll have to change the locks irrespective of whether he gives the keys back.

[Hidingtonothing]

X post, well done for telling DH OP, there is someone you can report this to though, it really is a police matter, he is refusing to return your keys and that constitutes theft. Please do it, he could do this to any number of other women and shouldn't be allowed to keep getting away with it.

[chillyogawine]

i texted him to ask for keys back

[Hidingtonothing]

That's a good point about claiming on insurance for the locks being changed actually, your keys have, in effect, been stolen so as long as you have a crime number you should be covered. Please don't feel you have to brush this under the carpet though OP, you really haven't done anything wrong and the sooner you get this out in the open with DH and the police the better you will feel