People who thought it was too late and then you met someone and had a family ... Tell me your stories?

[Yellowmilkshake]

I'm 31 and panicking. Firstly because all I've wanted is a family for the last 5 years really, and secondly because everyone else seems to have managed this, and I'm starting to be labelled as the 'career woman!' I love my job but I'm more than ready to compromise on it for a family. I just haven't met the right one.

I have an earlier thread which explains the panic!

Anyone who met someone later than they ideally wanted... Tell me your stories?

[Alwaysinahurrynow]

Met DH at 30 and just had DC3 seven years on. It's rubbish when you feel like you're the only single one and then dates aren't great. My tactic ended up going out at the weekend with a friend who always wanted to meet people on a night out and then chatting to their mates (I hated just going up to people and chatting to them).

[trumpybum1]

Meet my OH at 36 and now 2 years later we have our gorgeous DD. You have loads of time. Relax xxx

[Cherubneddy1]

Met DH in a pub when I was 37. Had 2 rounds of IVF then had DD at age 40. DS was then a natural surprise at 41. We've been together for 8 years and married for 2 and I love my family life so much.

I'd thought it was too late for me too. Good luck. You have loads of time.

[doubletrouble41]

You're too young to start worrying! I met DP early last year aged 40 now we ae both approaching 42 and expecting twins in November. I spent a lot of time in my 30s wondering if I would be alone forever..... don't fret! x

[Difficultyear2015]

I had terrible 15 year relationship from my teens intil 29.
Met current DP at 30. I then 31 in a few days and just found out we are having a baby

[Shesinfashion]

Met DP after a succession of disastrous relationships with bad boys aged 35. Had DC1 aged 37 and DC2 at 39.
At 31 I wasn't even worried about ending up alone. You're still young, stop worrying.

[Helen1966]

I knew a woman who vowed that if she was still single at 40, she would go out, have a one night stand and have a baby as a single parent.
On her 40th birthday she went out, met a lovely man the same age, they started dating, got married after 18mths and had a son 9mths after the wedding. They then had a daughter a couple of years after the son.
You have loads of time. Don't panic or compromise.

[Yellowmilkshake]

Anymore?

(After a let down of a date today!)

[Oysterbabe]

Ex walked out on me when I was 30. I spent a year single then joined pof. I had quite a lot of fun going on loads and loads of dates. Then I joined match and my now DH was my 3rd date from there. I met him in August 2013, when I was 32. Moved in July 2014, got engaged December 2014, married May 2015, I returned from honeymoon pregnant. Now have a 9 month old DD who I gave birth to when I was 35.

Things can move quickly when you met the right person and you're on the same page.

[Oblomov16]

I too was starting to become a bit worried, but met dh and got married at 30.
I think it's hard because quite a few people are already settled and finding the places single 30 year old men frequent is hard.
I wonder what the statistics are of where people meet most at this age: through work? At parties? Through mutual friends? It's so tricky isn't it?

[SleepFreeZone]

RockinHippy love that story!😍

[Yellowmilkshake]

Thank you everyone who has replied! Making me feel so much calmer and more positive :)

Think I will actually go on this date on Friday now :)

[FabFiveFreddie]

Met DH at 32 after a string of LTRs but not finding what I was truly looking for.

Didn't even know what that was until I met DH. Knew within a week, deep down, that he was what I wanted and needed.

Married, two kids, lots of change since then. And in all the time we've been together I have never learned anything about him that I didn't already know that first week, and what I knew that first week was fucking awesome - and just gets better the longer I know him/the greater the tests and challenges we face together. Very happy with the way my life turned out.

[SallyR0se]

I think it will happen when it's supposed to, no panic. I'm quite glad that I had 40 years to myself before getting married. Lots of boyfriends / lovers / friends with benefits. Enjoyed my heyday! No kids, who knows... But happily married now!

[FetchezLaVache]

My cousin-in-law (if that's a thing!) spent her 20s and 30s engaged to a complete loser who kept putting off the moment of commitment, marriage, kids etc, until she finally saw sense and dumped him. Met my cousin at a random barbecue aged 42, had DD at 43, still blissfully happy together 8 years on.

[catgee]

I was with someone for 11 years then 6 months before we were due to get married he turned round out of the blue (literally no warning at all) and said he felt we were more like friends and he couldn't be with me anymore. I was 29, I had never been on a date (we met in school so dating wasn't really necessary) and was living in a new city hours away from my family. Thought I would die single with no kids and lots of cats. Tried to prepare myself to be happy being the crazy auntie to my niece and nephew. Then I met my (now) husband and at 35 am expecting our first bub at Christmas. It can be really hard focus on yourself and finding the fun and joy in your own life/interests/activities and try not to drive yourself crazy over the things you don't have at the moment, then everything else will work out.

[RockinHippy]

Split with a long term DP at 30, which also resulted in giving up my business & getting a job.

In the next 10 years I managed to squeeze in another couple of disastrous relationships whilst realising if I put the same effort into my career & myself, I got far better results.

Enjoyed travelling, partying a fantastic career & bar a few flings on my own terms, I stopped bothering about wanting a relationship.

The relationships & flings I realised became a template for what I DIDN'T want in a man.

Some less independent friends didn't understand how much I was happy on my own. One hassling me for a list of my perfect man. I jokingly obliged with a quite bizarre, I depth & nit picky list to throw her off. She piped up - OMG that's xxxx - her ex from many years back & a mutual friend I had lost contact with. Lots of eye rolling & get losts at then friend. I had always had a soft spot for this guy, but I Really wasn't interested in a relationship with anyone.

Another friend died in strange circumstances & he was a mutual friend of this guy of old too. Myself & other unrelated friends were arranging a memorial & split up the list of contacts we had to find & make. This guy ended up on my list.

I rang him & turned out by coincidence, for the first ever we were both single, he was also living in a town I was visiting the next weekend with another couple of gay friends, so we arranged to meet for old times sake & nothing else.

Bizarrely that week I had a recurring dream about living in a house with blue decor & wooden beams, In my dream I was married with a little girl.

Met old friend in a gay bar, first time I had seen in 10 years. My 2 gay friends decided to head off & eat leaving me with old friend, headed back to his house so he could pick something up before going for a drink elsewhere - turned out it was the house from my dream


We were married 18 months later, I was 41 & DD was born later that year - still together & very happy 16 years later. DD was born on dead friends birthday!

[pastabest]

Split up with long term partner/fiancé age 29 and 9 months.

Age 29, 9 months and 2 days got drunk with a friend and went on OLD to 'get back on the horse'

Met DP age 29, 9 months and 1 week....

Realised at age 29, 9 months and 2 weeks that he was 'the one' and not just a rebound.

Age 30 and 1 month got pregnant had a miscarriage at 11 weeks

Age 30 and 7 months got pregnant again (on purpose this time!)

Now lying here age 31 not even a year and a half after the initial breakup, having my bladder repeatedly kicked by the bump, knowing I'm not going o get much sleep, next to loudly snoring DP and MNetting to take my mind off it.... Be careful what you wish for

[mustbetimeforacreamtea]

Spent my 30's with a lovely dp but by the end of the decade we wanted different things out of life. Split up in our early 40s. Met a few people but no one special. Thought I'd found my soulmate at 43, surprise baby at 44, marriage at 45, he walked out at 49, divorced at 52. Not what I'd planned or wanted but happily single now with a wonderful dd.

[Dowser]

My Dil met my son when she was 37 and he was 26
They had a son each. Then they had a son together just before her 40 th birthday.
If you saw them as a family you'd think they all had Same parents.
It's worked really well

[BlackeyedSusan]

met ex h mid thirties married after 1.5 yrs. two children at 37 and 39. both have disabilities, but these have a large hereditary component. one from father, one from mother, therefore not age related.

was panicking by 32 about not having dcs.

do not regret it even though there are difficulties and we split. children are worth it. might not have said that when ds sank his teeth in my arse during an autistic meltdown in the supermarket but he is really worth it depsite all that

[Dowser]

A friend of mine never met the right one and was desperate for a baby.
She tried ivf. Nothing
Then had triplet boys at 46
She's very happy ;-)

[Fairylea]

I was divorced twice by 28. First one was teen romance thing that went on for several years, had dd and then it all went tits up. Second one he left me for someone else...! Met my now dh at 31 and then had a ds together. Still going strong nearly 7 years on. We met on plenty of fish we are really happy. He was 7 years younger than me and living on his mums sofa having moved back from uni.... ! Sometimes you just have to stop worrying and go for things. You never know what's round the corner and it's never too late to give up. You have to keep putting yourself back out there.

[MrsRedFly]

My friend spent all her 30s with same DP - he finished it

But she's met someone else, married him & has a baby - all after age 40!

[SleepFreeZone]

Met DP at 36 through OLD. At the time I had just come out of a relationship, didn't want any commitment so decided to just do American style dating and keep it loose. Within 6 months I had moved in and was pregnant 😳

Four years later we have two kids, are getting married hopefully next year and are very happy indeed ☺️