Grown apart and now time to move on.....

[badassbetty]

My 1st EVER "conversation"
WHERE DO I START??
Splitting with DH after 16 years, 4 married with 2DDs
It is all ME, our relationship has been going down hill for a few years (we do nothing together, he sits upstairs and me downstairs with kids in evenings) and he doesn't understand that I'm no longer in love with him. He seems happy to go on as we have been.
I wouldn't want to see my 2DD in a relationship like this, IT IS NOT A RELATIONSHIP.
I have no supported from my family, don't agree with what i am doing.
I have no money until house sold.
Kids don't know yet BUT they do!!!!
Just feel lost and have no clue what to do

[badassbetty]

That's amazing needresolution
So many questions. Need to be brave now and push forward.

[needresolution]

Hi Badass similar situation, 15 yrs together, had enough so decided to end it. Very brave of me and Im glad Im out of it. Ive took all the blame because he was obviously happy the way things were ie me looking after a manchild.
Im a year on now, I met someone quite quickly and we aren't living together yet but probably on the cards and everything is so much better..
My divorce comes through this week and I'm expecting more vicious text but I don't care..Im freee!!

[badassbetty]

Spot on. Yes I am being the bad guy. Next step is to tell kids. But I don't know what the future holds so .....

[All0vertheplace]

Do you really think he'd be happy to go on, or is he making you do all the heavy lifting and be 'the bad guy' by having to end it yourself?

[badassbetty]

Thanks I will go check out link.

[All0vertheplace]

Sounds really hard. I have just gone through a similar thing with my DW (also 16 years together, two kids, no real passion or spark, lots of frosty silence and separate interests/lives). It's all very fresh and raw right now (I just spent the first week living in my separate house) and I have no real advice to give you, as I am probably not best placed to do so, since the feeling right now is quite bleak and sad. Good things on the horizon, perhaps.

This thread (link below) has turned into a bit of an epic, and you should find people on there who can offer advice. I'm sure people will come into this one and give you help too, though. Stay strong!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2592809-Curious-to-hear-from-people-who-have-left-marriages-that-werent-AWFUL-but-just-unsatisfying