vasectomy at 27?

[CommanderShepherd]

Dh and i have been together for 10 years and have a newborn. We had always said we'd have 1 kid. DH is saying he will go for a vasectomy. Is it just me but is that not way too young? I know it's his body but we don't know what the future holds, what if we decide to have another 5 years from now. I have had the implant in the past and happy to have it again. I just don't want him to regret something that could be irreversible in the years to come

[Blodynn]

I would ask him to wait a year or two. As your newborn grows and turns into a real little person, you may both change your minds and want another . If you are still adamant after a year or two then at least you can be surer of your feelings. I know many couples who want no more until their little one gets older and then they decide to have another

[pocketsaviour]

Men are treated as if they have minds of their own and are capable of making adult decisions about their reproductive capabilities, basically. And women are not.

Anyway, it's your DH's choice I'm afraid. If he is certain that he doesn't want any more children (and I applaud him for making a responsible choice that doesn't contribute to over-population) then he has the right to go for it. If you want more children, you have the right to end the marriage and look for someone else who also wants that.

[HyacinthBouquetNo1]

I was sterilised aged 25, i had 3 children and have never regretted it, best thing i ever did.

The first GP i saw wouldnt refer me, so i just saw a different dr at the practice and he was fine about it.

If you know your own mind and are sure, i dont think age matters

[HelenaDove]

And the Depo shot and the implant and the Mini Pill. Yep agree. We should be so grateful that we are expected to take drugs which affect our hormone levels and be expected to keep our weight down as well.

[CommanderShepherd]

helena I guess we should just be greatfull we get the pill

[BombadierFritz]

Gp wouldnt refer my dh either and he was 35 with 3 kids

[HelenaDove]

Commander there is a hell of a lot of sexism surrounding this issue. Holly gets asked exactly the same inane questions that i got asked back in the late 90s when i appeared on a couple of chat shows to discuss the issue.

[CommanderShepherd]

Off topic but that article seems rather sexist to me. Why is it no issue for a man yet that woman had to ask and ask for years?

I recon dh & I will have a good long talk about all the options for him and me and see what we come up with

[HelenaDove]

From the link.


"The technology journalist had asked for the procedure every day since she was 26 but doctors refused because of her age, offering to give her boyfriend a vasectomy instead"

Looks like your DH may not have a problem OP.

[HelenaDove]

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3513800/Holly-Brockwell-reveals-happiness-wins-four-year-battle-sterilised-Morning.html

[HelenaDove]

Im childfree by choice and i asked to be sterilized in my late twenties I got refused all 3 times that i asked.

Im 43 this year and still dont want children.

Funny how ppl are always asked Are you sure you dont want children? but are never asked Are you sure that you want them?

[scaevola]

I think most providers would be a bit cagey about the under 30s (of either sex) seeking something as permanent as sterilisation. Because life may be long and who knows what is round the corner? I know some people see that at patronising, and of course it is possible to have total clarity about a fixed desire at any age. But reversal is far from guaranteed to work, and there are other options.

Showing him that mirena/implant failure rates are similar to those of vasectomy might be a point worth making.

But I agree with what you said in your opening post - it's his body his choice, and other than stating your views there isn't much you can do about this.

(He may well get a flat no from the NHS, btw. Private prices start at about £400).

[Pinkheart5915]

I'd say he is too young as people do change there mind about these things. You've only just become parents so he may really love being a dad and want another in a few years.

You say your happy to have the implant again which I think due to his age would be the best best at the moment. He could then look at the vasectomy in a few years when his 30 maybe?

[BombadierFritz]

It is young but up to him, if the gp will agree. They might suggest waiting a year or two just to be sure. It doesnt stop you having more children thank goodness.

[FlounderingWildly]

If he's insistent on the vasectomy would he agree to freeze some sperm? Just a thought.

[LadyCatEyes]

My DH asked and was told at 35 he was too young!! We have three children and have decided no more. We are going to try again to get him referred.

[PotteringAlong]

If there's any doubt in your mind about having another then no way.

[ItsALuigi]

My DH is about to have his done at 27. We have two kids, he is adamant he doesn't want any more. I've drilled into him what ifs and he's still going ahead so. His choice.

[BumpAndGrind]

My DB had his last week, he was 30 in February just gone. He only has one child.

He knows he doesn't want any more so he took responsibility.

[madamginger]

DH had his at 30, but we had 3 kids. He had it done just 3 months after asking the gp for a referral.

[CommanderShepherd]

Was born

[CommanderShepherd]

*after the baby

[CommanderShepherd]

He has been taking about it for a while, he said he would get one after I was pregnant so for better part of a year. I guess it's the 'what if' I'm worried about

[Pippin8]

DH had his at 28, he was adamant 2 kids were enough. It's the best decision he ever made. He's 38 now & no regrets.

[TheNaze73]

I had mine at a similar age & was the best decision ever. Despite the warnings you are given about expectancy, if you leave the current relationship, I've not looked back