There is a point to this thread...bare with me!
Been having a rough week this week since splitting with exP. Mostly I force myself to feel better/distract myself but for some reason this week it has all overwhelmed me again and I can't pick myself back up!!
I know this is probably perfectly normal (I'm also pregnant so some days I'm worse than others!)
So the reason he says he didn't want to be together any longer was that he didn't love me anymore, just respected me as the Mother of our daughter and that things only carried on so long because of her.
He is with a new partner and he said this afterwards, when I asked for some closure as I couldn't understand how he could move on when I was carrying his child?
Lots of people have said to me now that the "not in love" words were a convenient "script" and that it only came out after his new fling to put the blame on me, let him feel less guilty, justify it etc etc.
Irrelevant of his reasons for only telling me now, I can't help but go over it in my head and he felt so bad about us, why did he not have the courage to say beforehand?
So as a broader post and from things I pick up now I'm slowly turning into a mumsnet addict, would things not be a lot easier, if we really did just talk?
If he had been honest, whilst it would still have hurt, surely it would have avoided me being pregnant and alone, other bad choices and severe heartache etc surely?
I'm not trying to say this is men at fault for not talking by the way!
The stupid things like us not seeing friends etc (whilst he never seemed to get that wasn't always easy with a toddler!) why could he have not said it was an issue for him prior to us breaking up?! At least then we could've made a conscious effort and I could have maybe aired any troubles that bothered me but he only said this after the seperation?!
He wasn't perfect, neither was I but he has come out with reasons I knew nothing about and I don't particularly think that I was blind to it, he just didn't say how he was feeling?!
I wouldn't take him back after what he has put us through now, not entirely sure of my reason for posting but I guess I still feel VERY hurt and almost cheated out of my own relationship because I wasn't really given an opportunity to work on anything? He just decided that was that.
I think my thread had a point of why not just talk about how we feel? Would it have been better or worse? But I think I've turned it into a "What if" and I just needed to vent, sorry.
I'm just so frustrated that I have lost my little family unit when he just seems to be happy and moving on without a backwards glance. I never actually thought we'd split, especially not with a child on the way? Losing the will some days and wish my head and heart would stfu! =(
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Relationships
Would it make it any easier?
clashofclanswidow · 12/03/2016 15:25
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