eek - date with man 22 years younger than me!

[babycourgette]

I've been asked out for a drink by a guy at work tomorrow evening - he's 26 and I'm 48.

I can pass for about 10 years younger but he knows how old I am.

He's gorgeous and there's always been an attraction between us but I never thought anything would come of it because of the age gap. Anyway, I'm recently single and not looking for a serious relationship. I suppose the only risk is that I fall for him big style as he's clearly not long term relationship material.

Biggest age gap I've experienced before was 12 years younger and I thought that was a lot!

[honeybunny14]

Go for it ! Hope you have fun op :-)

[MadBusLady]

Only just seen the name change, glad it went well

[RedFocus]

So many good reasons why this could go horribly wrong I'm afraid op. Very flattering but totally mad.

[SoftKittyWarmKitty]

How did it go, OP?

[TetrisBlock]

Good for you op. I'm 27 and will say that a lot of the men I know of my own age starting to mature into decent adults about now. Although some I could mention....

Hope the second date goes well!

[LottieJenkins]

OP have you name changed???

[pinkflaming0]

Had a lovely evening

Slightly tricky dynamic to start with but once I'd supressed the urge to take charge and mother him and I let him get on with it it was (better than) fine.

Going with the flow. Will be seeing each other again. It's not a secret but won't be making it obvious at work either.

No nakedness (yet).

[babycourgette]

Good to see some more positive messages have appeared overnight

I was always going to do it - go for a drink that is.

My workplace isn't at all sexist - lesbian CEO, lots of women in management roles. If we were to sleep together and he went around bragging about it I think it would reflect more badly on him for being immature. I think people would think 'good for her'. I'm confident enough to handle that.

I'd also hope that the bragging would be down to me being hot rather than old .

I don't think he'd do that anyway, he is a grown up. My step son is 25 and my best friend's son is 26 and he's not like them at all. Meeting someone when they're an adult is also very different to having known then since they were a little boy - that's eeeeew!

Re. getting naked in front of a fit 26 year old - fortunately I'm basically the same shape and size I was in my 20's (tall and slim) but obviously after three kids some things are not quite the same. Went through a bit of angst before DTD with the 12 years younger guy but afterwards realised men just don't notice all the things we do and went on to have the best sex of my life (so far at least).

Anyway, it's not a given that I'm going to sleep with him even if he is young, gorgeous and happens to want me - I'm not going to be a push over. Definitely not on a first date.

[PastPerfect]

Like others the work thing would put me off - but you know your company and if it's not going to be an issue at work I'd go for it actually I wouldn't because the idea of getting naked in front of a fit 26 year old makes me want to weep, but in theory...

[livingzuid]

Lawd I saw this and thought you go girl! It's just a drink, you're not about to go from that to progressing down the aisle and sounds like a fun evening. And if a night of great sex comes about then so what. People meet each other through work all the time. People go for drinks after work all the time. It's no big deal. Age gap is irrelevant, you're two adults.

You're a grown woman and you know what you're comfortable with doing and what you aren't comfortable with. I'd say go for it and let us know how you get on :)

My husband's office is a den of iniquity in comparison to your story and yet people still get the job done (he does not partake just to clarify ).

[GuybrushThreepwoodMP]

WTF? She would lack gravitas? It depends on how professional she wants to look?
Plenty of professional men have much younger partners and it doesn't immediately halt their career progression. If the OP works in such a sexist environment, I'd suggest a change in career anyway.
Otherwise she will look as professional as she is and her personal life will have nothing to do with it.

[MummyBeerest]

The work thing would throw me off too.

However, MadBusLady makes a compelling argument.

It's just drinks! Have fun!

[ravenAK]

I think I'd run the worst case/most embarrassing scenario possible (from a work POV) through my head - ie. you have a brief fling, & he then bounces around at work gleefully telling anyone who'll listen how he added you as a notch to his bedpost.

If this scenario would actually embarrass you in & of itself; don't go there.
If you're his boss/linemanger or he might conceivably at some point be yours; no.

If neither of the above apply, I'd say go for it. Just don't go taking it too seriously to be going on with, & be ready to laugh it off if/when needful.

[Wrapdress]

I'm jealous! If the work thing isn't an issue, I would go for it.

[zippey]

Go for it! Whether thats a relationship, sex or a date. No harm in having a bit of fun. A lot of relationships are with people you work with.

[beaglesaresweet]

I'd say yes IF he's mature. 26 isn't that young but depends on personal maturity level. If he's still a teeanger at heart so he goes around and brags to mates still - I wouldn't do it unless he was mind-blowingly attractive. If it's a bit of fun, take it or leave it - do it only if he is mature and can be trusted to be discreet, otherwise can get unpleasant at work.

[MillyBlods]

I couldn't as my son is in his early twenties as are all his mates so I would feel like a cradle snatched and just ...ewwww!!!!

[TheVictorian]

I would say give it a shot but make sure your both clear with each other about what you want in terms of a relationship or fling with each other.

[CoffeeTea103]

Firstly he's old enough to be your son, to him you would be something to brag about and you're aware he isn't looking for something long term. As flattering as it is I wouldn't. You wouldn't want unnecessary complications at work as well.

[FloraSpreadableMacDonald]

Im recently single and was asked out by a 22 year old guy, and Im 41. I suspect he wanted the whole older woman experience. Whilst he was hot, I declined.
I am the mother of 2 boys and i began thinking 'what if that was my 22 year old son?'.
Just a thought. Good luck whatever you decide.

[cluecu]

I don't think that the age gap is an issue on its own but....and it's too early to think like this...but.....

Are you just wanting a bit of fun? Is he? If it's potentially serious does he want kids? To be brutally honest there are double standards in gender afe gaps but the older man has a biological advantage that the older woman doesn't have

I am aware that this isn't necessarily an issue obviously

[babycourgette]

Liking your attitude MadBusLady - that's actually the kind of phrase I often use e.g. Nobody thinks on their death bed 'I wish I'd mopped the kitchen floor more often'!

Hmmmm Mintyy if I did 'bed him' I might brag about it to my 48 year old mates. Maybe he should be worried about that?

If the age difference were the other way round it would still be the woman who was being warned that the 48 year old man would be bragging about bedding a 26 year old woman. Strange that

[MadBusLady]

I don't buy all this social awkwardness stuff, it is of the moment, and it goes away when people get bored. I look back now at situations which seemed impossibly fraught with social and professional no-nos at the time and think "Oh, I wish I'd just bloody asked him/shagged him". Nobody ever reached the end of their life wishing they'd had less sex with hot people.

[perplexedpirate]

Oh, fuck it, just do it! Life is just too short for what ifs.
So it might be awkward at work if things don't go to plan but worse things happen at sea.
I don't regret much in life, but the only thing I do regret is cowardice.
Fortune favours the bold OP.
Good luck.

[Cabrinha]

It's not about meeting people at work, loads of people do. It's about the age difference and you saying you're not looking for serious and that he isn't long term material anyway.
You know your company, not me.
But I know that at mine (large, global) that age difference would spread like wildfire and you would potentially be considered to lack... gravitas! Depends how professional you need to appear.
If he was similar age and you potentially a boyfriend - well, worth the work fallout risk I think, and not going to look unprofessional.