My H moved out 5 months ago after 2 pointless, soul-destroying years of attempting to repair our marriage post revelation of his long affair.
On the face of it I'm ok, looking after 3 DC, going to work, keeping the house in order (of sorts) and generally doing what needs to be done.
But underneath I'm a shell. I'm just so, so sad. Not because I love him and miss him I don't think (though I do miss sharing the day-to-day with him) but because I feel like I am grieving for the loss of family life. I dread weekends and holidays when one or more of the DC are with him, because I feel like I'm missing a limb and I get so down. It doesn't feel real. The idea that our family life is now split into two separate elements, half of which I am not part of, and the other half of which I must manage alone, really hurts.
Living abroad far from family and old friends makes it worse.
I know I have to drag myself out of this.
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Relationships
Mourning my normal family life
optionalExtras · 09/05/2013 14:35
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