The evil cow w has gone Skye. Together with the om, she has departed these shores to live in warmer climes having first done her level best to further destabilise the dc by requesting they be taken into care by SS.
I'm going to start SHOUTING at you now, dad, because, DESPITE THE SOUND ADVICE YOU'VE RECEIVED HERE to make it your FIRST PRIORITY, you have SINGULARLY FAILED to get your act together and CONSULT A SOLICITOR who specialises in divorce and family law.
I appreciate you were hoping madam would be back begging on her knees for you to overlook her infidelity and that this futile wish caused you to delay making an appointment for fear that instituting divorce proceedings would further harden her heart towards you, but surely you can now see the writing on the wall and have come to full realisation of the fact that there is NO WAY that she is going to be ANYTHING OTHER THAN DETERMINED to make life difficult for you and your boys?
PLEASE DON'T fall into the trap of complancy by thinking 'out of sight, out of mind' because, in the event that the om's family are well-heeled/well connected, and/or that the business they are allegedly intending to set up for their progeny thrives, your w will have no problem whatsoever in instituting proceedings in the UK Courts from her new location to apply for residency/contact Orders and, should she do so, she can at the very least be confident of requiring you to wave your boys off on regular trips to stay with their dm either here or in her sunny new home.
AS YOU HAVE BEEN REPEATEDLY TOLD, the main purpose of speaking to a solicitor is FIRST AND FOREMOST to SECURE THE STABILITY OF YOUR DC by obtaining a residency Order and if you continue to make excuses for your inaction delay, YOU WILL miss the legal aid boat.
Put your clear-headed hat on, get back to the solicitors who asked if you had proof of income and tell them 'yes you have' and you need an appointment not later than 28 March. If they cannot accomodate you, get the yellow pages out, source other local solicitors who specialise in divorce and family law, phone around, and don't be reluctant to stretch the truth because, to all intents and purposes, at this point in time you qualify for legal aid entitlement and the OBJECTIVE is to get you sat in front of a solicitor before the end of this month.
Bear in mind that it is the solicitor who makes application for legal aid and you are simply required to sign the appropriate forms confirming that you've told the truth about your income, or lack of it. In your case you'll be asked to consent to the Legal Aid Board making whatever checks they deem necessary with whatever government agencies you are receiving, or have applied to receive, benefits from.
Although it may take some time for child benefit to be made over into your name, the fact you've applied should be sufficient to establish your entitlement to legal aid BEFORE THE RULES CHANGE and this entitlement will carry through after the end of March, at which time the solicitor who has made the application can begin proceedings for residency, write a letter to your HA which should concentrate their mind on transferring the tenancy to you free and clear of arrears, chivvy the Child Benefit Agency,and institute divorce proceedings if you are so inclined.
If you take a look at my numerous other responses to OPs on this board, you'll see that I rarely rant in the way I've done here and I trust you'll understand that the reason I'm trying to get you off your bum giving you a hard time is due to my genuine concern for the welfare and wellbeing of you and your boys in the longer term.
One thing's for sure, dad. You haven't heard the last of her and I'm IMPLORING you to be proactive now and do your utmost to protect your boys and get yourself the peace of mind that will enable you not to dread what the postman may deliver at some future date when, unless you have got megabucks stashed under your mattress, you may find yourself up against hotshot lawyers without any recourse to legal advice/support.
A good solicitor is worth their weight in gold. Do yourself a favour, dad, and get yourself one TODAY.