DPs table manners

[thisisfartoohonest]

This seems so daft when writing it down, but here goes. I really don't like my DP's table manners. We got together when we were young and carefree and I never noticed them, probably because we never sat down for proper meals then. But now that we have young dc I care more as I want them to have nice table manners. He eats on his elbows, and scoffs his food. Do you think I am being totally unreasonable?

[SomersetONeil]

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[Helltotheno]

In UK society??? ho hum...

Well as it happens I don't lick knives myself but am a serial 'elbows on the table' offender so shoot me.... i guess if breaking those arbitrary rules is what defines a person for you, there it is.... I could say the same about my intolerance for noisy eating (I think that's actually a condition, I can't remember the name of it...)

[BelleDameSousMistletoe]

Who said it "defined a person" for me? I just said I don't like it and that it is considered bad manners (which it is). Hardly defining someone. You could be a saint for all I know.

Sounds more like my preference for nice manners is actually what you"re using to define me.

[MaryMungoAndMidgies]

My partner licks glasses, cups, knives and plates. He slurps everything - hot or cold - noisily. He chews with his mouth open and speaks with his mouth full. He scrapes bowls and plates to get every last bit and his teeth bite and scrape against the cutlery.

I have tried very hard not to do things that annoy him. I do believe there needs to be some sort of give and take. I mentioned quietly how much it upset me and he said that he could behave how he wanted as it was his house. I was told to stop picking and back off.

Do you get used to it over time? I read somewhere that it is also bad manners to say to someone that they have poor table manners. I am guilty of this. I admit it.

One of my old employers interviewed applicants then took them out for dinner. He told me he couldn't bear the thought of sitting across from someone who showed him their half chewed food every lunchtime and hired accordingly.

[ImperialBlether]

You deserve better, CominThroughTheWry. Everyone does.

How can you stand to sit opposite him? He's disgusting and he's disrespectful. I couldn't do it.

[DDiggler]

Imperial you just come across as a cunt tbh. I feel for the bloke that has to put up with your precious attitude.

[GrimAndHumourlessAndEven]

oh come on Diggler, that's a really horrid post

[FairhairedandFrustrated]

And you sound so much better Diggler

[ImperialBlether]

You're calling me a cunt because I wouldn't sit opposite a man who ate like that? Really? Says more about your eating habits than anything else, DDiggler.

[Helltotheno]

Of course you're not a cunt.. I said worse on this thread. That said, I thought your comments about your sister were nasty... just because she licks a knife the odd time, she got the 'oh she's so used to being a sad singleton alone that she's completely lost the run of herself and... shock horror... licks her knife. How weird'. Maybe you don't realise how badly that came across?

[ClippedPhoenix]

Never call anyone a cunt because a cunt is useful

[SolidGoldFrankensteinandmurgh]

I do think that if someone is intensely precious about table manners, that person needs to work on getting over him/herself a little bit. While it's selfish to eat like a wolverine when it distresses your dinner companions (slobbering, food everywhere, noises and smells...) it's equally selfish to pick away constantly at trivia such as using the right spoon to the extent that other people can't enjoy their food for worrying about the next thing they do that might make you start whining or giving them martyred looks.