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Relationships

The pill, anyone else feel like a new person since coming off it?

53 replies

susiemumof · 12/06/2012 22:05

Not sure if this is the right place to post or not but wanted to write this incase it helps someone else.

Am 30 years old and have been on the pill pretty much non-stop since I was 14 (heavy af) obviously came of while ttc and while pg with our 3dc.

Have struggled on and off with terrible mood swings, most of my adult life. Have pretty much starved my lovely dh of affection and often sex (due to no sex drive) for most of our married life. At some points we came close to splitting up because he always felt I pushed him away and I did not know how to be different.

Anyway I came off the pill about 6 months ago (due to medical reasons am not ttc) and I honestly can't believe the difference in me since I came off it.

I am so much happier and loving to my family have no mood swings and can't keep my hands of dh! I'm convinced that being on the pill totally altered my personality.

I actually feel quite sad when I think of how many years I have been on it and in a way feel like I have lost my 20's which I will never get back.

Am posting this as I was talking to a friend today who has just started taking the pill ago 40 and she has experienced a lot of the same symptoms I have mentioned.

Obviously the pill is fantastic for many but I just wanted to share my experience as I had no knowledge of anyone who had experienced what I did when on it.

OP posts:
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VerySale · 06/01/2020 00:31

I switched from cerazette to the implant a month ago. My god the difference! DP could always tell when I was due on because of my mood swings. I'd also get hysterically upset over stuff and was generally a moody cow. We twigged when I had my period on the implant and no pre-warning mood swings. I feel like a different person. I'll never take the pill again. Was on it on and off since my teens and I've always suffered with mood swings. Thought it was just me.

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Nomorewine77 · 05/01/2020 12:58

So glad I read this thread. I'm 42 and had been on the pill from the age of 17/18 constantly ( apart from ttc, pregnancy etc ) I feel exactly the same as you @susiemumof and it did result in separation between me and DH as we hadn't had sex for 2/3 years at that point over a year ago now. I felt shut down, switched off, ragey and quite honestly repulsed by him ( and he knew it, which is truly awful ). I came off the pill shortly after we separated in Oct 2018, 6 weeks later I was a completely different person and my God was I rampant! Thankfully after much talking, apologising etc we agreed to get back together and aside from ironing through a few other niggles in our relationship all is good, I feel we have a normal healthy sexual, affectionate realtionship now. I blame the pill entirely for how I was and I'd rather have terrible cramps for 24 hours and a bit of PMT than an exDH!
It too makes me extremely angry that it can have such a negative impact on some women's lives and by extension their boyfriend's, partner's, husband's and children's lives.
I also as a PP said, tried again on another pill for 3 months of this year and I could feel the same thing happening again. Grim.

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aoifeck · 05/01/2020 10:11

@thecatsarecrazy how long did it take to get back to normal would you say?

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thecatsarecrazy · 05/01/2020 09:32

I went on the pill in September. Got fed up of heavy periods after having 3 children they have got worse. I tried it for 2 month's and it was absolutely horrendous. I cried all the time, I felt completely numb at times. Me and dh went away for a romantic night away but I just sat there with no feelings. My sex drive went completely. I wouldn't touch them again.

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aoifeck · 05/01/2020 09:12

hi!! been reading through this and felt the exact same as so many people on this thread while on cerazette, stopped about 3 weeks ago and mood hasn’t improved much, wondering how long it took people to return to ‘normal’?

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Magpiemagpie · 21/09/2017 16:30

I took it for two months recently - I have never taken it at all
The change in me was horrendous practically overnight it seemed
I'm quite sensitive to my moods / body and PMT so I knew it was the pill I felt like I had a huge black fog over me
No energy , sleeping loads and really felt on the edge and felt like I couldn't make the simplest of decisions
I stopped taking and I felt better within days
I think after reading all the stuff on here and speaking to friends say that the pill probably causes way more problems than it's worth
Lack of sex drive mood swings the pill ain't worth

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notagain123456 · 21/09/2017 16:18

i would love to come off the pill but after a bad experience with the coil i dont know my options. ive not used condoms in years so dont want to go back to them.

i think the pill has caused my anxiety and moods and would hate to think i could have done somthing to stop it.

my DP has no children and is too young to be considered for sterilisation (not sure we want that yet anyway)

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anupamasingh · 20/09/2017 17:50

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MadgeMak · 28/05/2016 17:37

I came off the pill permanently after I had my second child, it made a huge difference to my mood swings. When I was in it was so full of rage, shouting at the kids for any little thing. Wish I'd made the connection between it and my mood years ago too, life is so much better now and I will never take hormonal contraception again.

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MissBattleaxe · 28/05/2016 17:20

I had awful mood swings in Cerazette. I was very irritable and hated myself for it. Totally different now I'm off it and I would never take any progesterone contraception again.

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kerbys · 28/05/2016 14:49

I tried two types of pill many years ago, they both turned me into a monster. My DH brushed passed me in the kitchen one day and I wanted to stab him.

I was sterilised at 29. No regrets at all.

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Changingagain · 28/05/2016 14:49

Another one here who didn't realise the effect it was having on me until I stopped to ttc. I had assumed the sex drive was just a getting older thing, it really annoys me that so many woman go on the pill with no idea of how much it can change them. 2.5 years off the pill now and DS is 9 months. We just use condoms now.

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Grumpyoldmomma · 28/05/2016 14:35

Oh my word, I so didn't know about this! I have been on the pill for 22 years only having a break to have my DC. Currently on Cerazette. I also take Sertraline for depression or anxiety. I am now wondering how much if this is down to the bring on the pill. I have no sex drive whatsoever. I have been considering getting sterilised and this could be another reason for going ahead with it. Thank you OP for bringing thus to my attention!

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PiePiePie · 28/05/2016 14:18

People always say "try a new pill or another method" etc but really, unless there's some pressing reason you can't use other forms of contraception, who has the time to fuck about with their hormones? If you get really obvious side effects like terrible PMT or bleeding etc then doctors will fall over themselves to prescribe something different, but low moods and mild depression are so insidious - particularly if you've been on hormonal contraception virtually since puberty - it can creep up on you and it takes years to realise something's wrong.

Seriously it's the best thing I ever did. I felt like I was coming out of a fog.

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PiePiePie · 28/05/2016 14:15

YES. Came off the pill about 33 and honestly couldn't believe the difference to my mood, sex drive, energy, everything. Within six months i felt like the person I probably "should" have been all along if that makes sense. I thought that just feeling mildly shitty all the time is just what I was like as an adult, I went on it at 19.

Read Holly Griggs-Spall, Sweetening the Pill. It made me quite angry. Also, for those in relationships, do a final STI check on both of you and google the Fertility Awareness Method. I have done it in relationships. It works.

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SouthDownsSunshine · 28/05/2016 13:14

Many years since I came off the pill, but I can vividly remember the change it made. My sex drive returned, I had more energy and no longer felt as though i had mild depression. It was great coming off it (other than the awful periods).

I'll never go back on it. No idea what contraceptive we'll use after this pregnancy though.

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SoThatHappened · 28/05/2016 13:07

Wow.
I started taking the pill last year only just came off it a few days ago.

Have had dreadful moods.

Place marking

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happyandsingle · 28/05/2016 11:06

Why is it always women who feel responsible for contreception? Even in commited relationships? A condom is hassle free for men no mood altering drugs they just put something on the end of it and thats it. Its more evasive for women to use contreception with a lot more side effects.
And it takes 2 to make a baby!!

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EggbertHeartsTina · 28/05/2016 09:25

I had a very similar experience about 3 years ago when I came off the pill (I wasn't ttc although have since had a DS). I remember feeling a marked difference in how I felt - so much happier, less mood swings, more positive etc. I did start exercising at the same time so I suppose that added to the improvement but I've always thought the pill had something to do with it.

Since having DS I've been considering going back on it but I'm really not sure now especially after seeing this post!

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CamembertQueen · 28/05/2016 09:24

I felt like a completely different person! Had been on it since I was 14. Came off it and my skin went back to that of a teenager but soon settled. I was a dragon on it and never realised. Never will I put hormones in my body again, it completely sucked out my personality!

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KatsutheClockworkOctopus · 28/05/2016 09:21

Another one who has come off and noticed a huge difference. I was on mini pill and find the increase in my motivation and happiness amazing since stopping. I have also stopped losing my hair abd having hideous migraines-another massive plus!

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GinIsIn · 28/05/2016 09:10

I miss the pill. We are TTC so have come off it. Have put on 2 stone and my moods are all over the place! Sad

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Glitterspy · 28/05/2016 09:05

Fwiw I do get much heavier natural periods now but I care not a jot!

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Glitterspy · 28/05/2016 09:03

I am much happier off the pill, I have had my 2dc and "never say never" but am not planning any more. Despite this I won't be going back on the pill. I briefly went back on after DS2 only to find I'd been prescribed a lactation-suppressing oestrogen pill despite the doctor knowing I was ebf AngryThat was the final nail in the coffin for me and the pill and I don't plan on taking it again, ever.

When my children are old enough to take the decision I think I'll advise them to think carefully. I do think it's best for rabbits teens and 20s as its such a reliable bAckstop contraception-wise but other than that the hormonal/ mind-body-related price is too high.

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Nosboramme2016 · 28/05/2016 06:55

I feel horrendous and I think it's the pill. Reading this makes me so sad (which might actually be the pill too) because it's been happening for years by all accounts. Why didn't I know? I'm so angry (which might also be the pill) that I might be a different person under all the law hormones. I would strongly advise that no one take Desogestrel, it's ruined me as a person and I think my boyfriend is leaving me. Sad

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