I would like to ask some advice regarding my sister's relationship with her partner, I will try to keep it as brief as poss...here goes...
Sis met her now partner around 6 years ago (she is now 64 and he is 70) after her husband left her. I will refer to sis as A and partner as E. E came along and paid her attention and made sure she was alright financially (as she had some initial difficulty after the split) as he was quite shrewd with money, so basically looked after her. A needed to sell her house to pay off husband, so E suggested she move into his home. After a while (around 18mths) it was quite noticeable that A was losing weight. A confided in me that things were not good at home.
This is what she tells me is happening...
He causes a huge fuss when she goes to see her daughter/granddaughter, even though he is quite welcome to go (but declines)
Does not welcome her daughter/granddaughter into his home
Consistently says to her that they don't "connect"
Stops speaking to her
When she has any change of hairstyle/clothing, ridicules rather than compliments
Tells her she irritates him with her behaviour
Tells her that she never does what she says she was going to do (like cleaning the bathroom on a set day!)
So much more, I will be here for days..
However, he's a great housekeeper, very domesticated and utterly reliable, and when he is in company (very occasionally) he is polite and courteous, in fact quite a nice bloke.
As far as I can see, this is a controlling relationship, I just need confirmation.
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Is this controlling behaviour?
15 replies
WillIEverBeASizeTen · 19/05/2011 19:53
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