Good luck to everyone who has a child starting at reception this week

[Schnullerbacke]

DD turned 5 today and since bedtime I have been sitting on computer, looking at baby pictures, shedding tons the odd tear. Time has flown, am sure most of you have felt it at some point, and now the time has come for our babies to start school. It feels odd, seeing the last 5 year as a block, its all been fun, had great times. Now it feels as if life is turning very serious and I don't like it.

Of course they still need us but I have this feeling that they will pull away and grow up even faster now, wanting to be with their friends more and more, not so much depending on us.

So, here is to our babies - I hope they will all have a great school start. Here is to us Mums - hope this week won't be too hard on us.

[Jammyrella]

DD starts full time tomorrow. I confess that I am feeling a touch sad that this our last day together (just us, not DH, as we'll be at weekends.) But although a June birthday, so one of the younger ones, I'm sure she is more than ready. She is v excited, that's for sure. But yesterday she said she would miss me. (I work part-time, but term time only, so we have just had all summer together.) I said I would miss her too but we would be having fun at work/school - she told me she would be having fun at school, but I would not have fun at work!

[AmandaMummy]

Well, my little girl's second day at school today. She came home very happy yesterday and was excited about going again today. This has definitely helped me to feel a little more positive about the whole school thing. However, still missing her loads and keep wondering what she's doing now and hoping she's ok. She drew me a lovely picture yesterday evening when she got home from school, saying it was a special picture for me to keep as she would be in reception every day from now on - but I'm going to have to try not to look at it today as I know it will probably start me off crying again. Hopefully each day will get easier...?

[MugglesandLuna]

DS wouldnt leave the house. Didnt want to leave his ninky nonk behind so I had to take him in the buggy. He growled at me the whole way to school. Once we got into reception he cheered up and was doing some makaton. I asked his how he felt and he signed excited, so I think thats a good thing.

Picking him up at 12.

[IwishIwasmoreorganised]

I've taken ds1 for his first day in Year 1, and ds2 for his first morning in meithrin today. They were both fine!

I feel all out of sorts, like a bit of me is missing! I know this sounds sad, but I really can't remember having 2 1/2 hours to myself for a very, very long time! I work 3 days a week so I'll only have this time to myself 2 days a week but I'm feeling awfully weepy - I looked back in the mirror driving home from school and saw 2 empty cars seats and that set off the tears (here I go again typing this!).

I've cooked a curry, got a bolognaise in the slow cooker, done a load of washing, uploaded their first day photos onto facebook and and now indulging myself with MN for 1/2 hour before I go to pick ds2 up.

We were going to stop at 2 dc, but today's making me wonder if that's what I really want (I know, Iknow!)!

[homeaway]

Gosh I still remember the first day of school, my dd had it down to a T, clinging and crying as soon as she was in the classroom, I departed my heart breaking but two seconds later after I was out of sight the crying stopped. She is off to Uni next week and although I am so proud and have been told not to blub, I know I will ! Time flies by so indulge yourselves in a tear or two and know that before you know it they will be flying the nest.

[emlu67]

My DS started today too but made it easier for me as he was so excited and was the first child to go into the classroom. I didn't even get a backward glance. So he is fine, it is me that is upset! He is my youngest child and I am finding it harder than before. Looking forward to a glass of vino tonight....

[marytuda]

Just left my DS, first day in reception. He clung to me and screamed when finally the teacher pealed him off me. Now I'm feeling guilty for having "over-mummied" him by not being madly social, or got him used to strings of babysitters, thus making separation anxiety worse. That said he'll probably be fine. It's a lovely little place, just over the road. But he's so small, four 2 weeks ago, such a sensitive, un-laddish little soul, and my one and only! I'm in floods . . .

[icravecheese]

Hi all

So glad I found this thread - usually post on pregnancy forum as am due no3 in 4wks time.

My DS started school yesterday, he has been SO excited about it, left nursery 3 wks ago (where he was very popular, had loads of friends, was mega confident etc etc). He went to a nursery out of town but has started school at our local infants round corner from our house, so doesnt really know anyone starting in his class.

He went into school fine yesterday, & came out fine. But on walk home told me he had cried at morning break, lunchtime & afternoon break. He hates noisy situations (unless its him making the noise!) & I think the playground scares him - there are 90 reception class kids split into 3 classes, & they all play together at break times.

THis morning, he screamed the whole playground down, didnt want to go into the classroom & the teacher had to carry him in with him screaming "dont leave me mummy". I was so upset (preg hormones don't help!) but would never get upset in front of him as it'll only make it worse.

Anyone with similar experiences that has any good advice?? He is SO ready to go to school, & is usually so sociable & chatty. I know its only day 2, but I really didnt expect him to cry so much... wanted to have him all lovely & settled before baby arrives in 4 wks time....perhaps impending baby is what is un-nerving him? Any advice much appreciated!!

[ArseyContarsie]

hands out and a big hug for marytuda

he'll be fine, honest

[FootprintsOnTheMoon]

Anyone else had a false start? Didn't read the letter abou staggered starts d'oh!

But had a lovely day with both my boys. This time next month DS1 will be in 'ception and DS2 in nursery and it'll be so quiet!

[carocaro]

My DS2 starts tomorrow (he is my last child) and my DS1 aged 9 already sorted it at the end of the last term with his new teachers that he might be late on day1 as he had to ensure that his little brother was happy and settled in his new classroom.

The thought of them walking in together hand in hand is serisously gone make my heart leap.

[sheeplikessleep]

DS1 doesn't start until September 2012 and this thread has me in tears already!! Bloody hell, do I have a whole year of this?

Good luck to all of you and your los :)

[Abgirl]

marytuda and icravecheese they will be fine, honestly. Stay hidden for 10 minutes after you've dropped them off and peek in the window. If you're still worried talk to their teachers and tell them about your concerns. icravecheese I suspect there is a bit of knowing there is lots of change on the way and even if you don't get upset he'll be able to see your concerned face. Do you know any other class mates you could invite round for tea one day after school?

Please replay this advice back to me in two weeks when DS2 starts school

[Hersetta]

My DD started reception yesterday. Am so proud of her as she only turned 4 on 31/8 so she's the youngest in the entire year. As we were lining up to go in she said to me firmly ' don't come in with me Mummy, I can go by myself' . So, off she went without a backward glance. i did peek in to make sure she had put her coat and bag on the right peg (she had) and then left her to it.

When I picked her up and chatted to her it turned out that she hadn't been taken as she should have for school dinners and therefore hadn't eaten anything apart from a couple of mini breadsticks all day. Went back and had a chat to her teacher and head of year to ensure it didn't happen again - can't believe they didn't have a list and take all the little ones over to the dinning room but it all worked out today - should I ask for a credit for the dinner money do you think?

[MuddlingMackem]

CheerfulYank

I wish we got uniforms...

[MuddlingMackem]

Hersetta

Most definitely you should ask for a credit on the dinner money.

My dd had her first day in reception today and was very confused that she wasn't staying for dinner. She did the whole of last year in the school nursery class and stayed for dinner every day from her second day. :) She was very relieved to hear normal dinner time service will resume tomorrow, although she doesn't start full days until the day after that.

[marytuda]

Yes, thanks Arsey & Abgirl he was fine. Came out at 3.30 cool & nonchalant as you please, definitely not wanting to be made fuss off. Teacher reassured me that, as you say, soon as I left he was great all day. & not even particularly tired, dashed off to play with his best-friends the neighbours who being private-school have not started term yet.
Now of course I worry that they will start to look down on him, there is a bit of an apartheid round here between state and private-school kids, which is also a racial divide - but that's an issue for another thread. & anyway, he's so cute in his uniform how could anyone not love him?!

[icravecheese]

Thanks Abgirl, my little one came out of school chirpy enough, but informed me he'd cried alot in the day. Its so unlike him. Daddy is going to try taking him tomoro & walk to school with a friends neighbour whose daughter is in his class too. He seems quite happy& keen to do that. he's totally fine at home-not quiet or upset & talks quite openly about school. So we've decided to perhaps not make such a big thing of the crying anymore, not ask loads of questions about crying like we have been doing. Hoping it'll all blow over soonish...

[pranma]

My dgs started reception today and was so proud as he was chosen as 'star of the day'.
Although his Mum and I are are very very proud of him I'm not sure it is a good idea to do this on the first day.

[NanaNina]

Haven't had time to read all posts and am a grandmother not a mum. I just wanted to say to you mums whose children are just starting school, if they say they have no friends, or no-one wants to play with them, please don't get upset because it's often not true. My dil was very worried a couple of years ago when her little boy started school and came home saying he didn't play with anyone in the playground etc., she was on the phone to me in tears but I wasn't too worried as I'd heard the same thing from my grand-daughter when she first started school and it turned out not to be true. In fact it was heart breaking for me to hear my beloved gr-dghtr saying "no one wanted to play with me" and me saying "what did you do then" and she said quietly "I just walked round the playground on my own"...........oh god I could have cried.

My dil found out from a few of the mums she was friendly with, that all their children had come home saying the same thing - no friends etc etc. so if it happens to you, take it with a pinch of salt.

September is a time of new beginnings and this is the first one......I am now anxious that my fr-dght settles in her new secondary school, and whether my grandson settles in the juniors, and it wa the same with my own kids. When my eldest son went to uni I used to sit and cry in his bedroom...........so this is just the beginning, but it usually all works out ok in the end.

[icravecheese]

wise words nananina - thank you so much! My DS said the whole 'I wondered round on my own / everyone was playing with everyone else' thing... & I went to bed Monday night wanting to sob myself to sleep. But I know for fact that lots of the other kids don't know anyone else either so they were either all wondering round on their own, or more likely were playing together!

I have put it all into perspective now - like you say, we've got junior school / secondary school / uni to get through yet, so I need to save some tears / energy for those milestones too!!

[MrsKitty]

DS started reception today (aged 4.7). It was awful .

He's been so excited all week, but as soon as we got in to the yard he went in to his 'shut down' mode...wouldn't look at anyone, wouldn't speak (even to me) and just buried his little head in to me. Then when it was time to line up to go in he wouldn't let go. The teacher ended up pretty much dragging him in to school with his little face all crumpled up.

He's been going to nursery for the last 3 1/2 years and I'd really hoped school would be OK (although this was probably optimistic).

He's such a brave, funny, caring and bright little thing, but whenever something or someone new arrives he retreats so far in to his shell that it takes forever for his personality to come back through. I worry that others just won't have the patience to get to know him and help him be himself again (that goes for the teachers as well as the other children).

Taken this week off work as I want to be there for drop off and collection in his first week, so I'm off to try and distract myself with the million and one things that need doing around the house...

[icravecheese]

Don't worry Mrskitty, I'm going through exactly the same thing as you at the moment - in fact my sons behaviour sounds identical to your little chap... boys can be soooo sensitive & I too worry that everyone will just think he's the boy who cries all the time & so no-body will want to make friends with him.

My son went to nursery 3 mornings a wk from 9months old, had masses of friends, was very sociable, popular & has a great sense of humour. He has been mega excited about school for months too. But, like you say, any new or different situation & DS clams up, won't look at anyone / talk to anyone. Its so frustrating because he is so outgoing in a familiar environment.

We spent most of monday evening & tuesday evening talking to him about his crying / why he cried / who looked after him etc etc. He openly admitted that he cried at school, & doesnt seem upset at all at home. Goes to bed fine, gets up fine, gets dressed into uniform fine, walks all the way to school chatting away. Its as soon as we get into the playground it all goes wrong!

So this morning we decided to try a new tactic - when I collect him from school later & he no doubt tells me he cried during the day, i'm going to try brushing over it & saying 'oh dear' then talking about something else. I think all our emphasis on him being upset might be perpetuating it a little. My husband took him into school this morning & although there were tears, it was apparently a little bit better than yesterday with me (being carried into classroom by teacher, screaming 'don't leave me mummy'! I was mortified & felt so upset!).

So try not to get too upset - I think many many children go through this, especially sensitive little boys! Keep yourself busy & think that they won't still be doing this aged 15 (I hope!!) xx

[Peetle]

Our twins start on the 23rd due to some overrunning building work. They were only 4 in July and are both small for their age, so they'll be tiny in school. But they make up for that in volume. The building work does mean they both get brand new classrooms, though I doubt they'll appreciate that.

Thanks to the delay, we're siezing the opportunity for our last "cheap" holiday for 14 years next week.

They really enjoyed nursery and we were amazed by their reports so apart from some initial trauma I'm sure they'll be fine. However, they were knackered after a morning of nursery so I'm not sure how they'll cope with a whole day of school (full time from the off for them).

I do feel this is the end of an era but it's also the start of a whole new world for them and us.

[MrsKitty]

Thanks icravecheese, it's comforting to know it's not just us - Seems like my friends children have all just waltzed in without a second look!

Counting the hours to pick up time now, and hoping that he'll be full of beans after a day of fun... Fingers crossed, eh?!