Good luck to everyone who has a child starting at reception this week

[Schnullerbacke]

DD turned 5 today and since bedtime I have been sitting on computer, looking at baby pictures, shedding tons the odd tear. Time has flown, am sure most of you have felt it at some point, and now the time has come for our babies to start school. It feels odd, seeing the last 5 year as a block, its all been fun, had great times. Now it feels as if life is turning very serious and I don't like it.

Of course they still need us but I have this feeling that they will pull away and grow up even faster now, wanting to be with their friends more and more, not so much depending on us.

So, here is to our babies - I hope they will all have a great school start. Here is to us Mums - hope this week won't be too hard on us.

[icravecheese]

thanks ladies, I love mumsnet for the fab support

[Abgirl]

elinor I'm work full time so DH did drop offs and pick ups (although we have changed our hours so he now works in the morning and I do drop offs). You may find that there are other dads doing drop offs as well and PFB will soon be making friends and your DP will have to start talking to other parents when they ask PFB to tea. Also PFB will soon be beseiged with party invitations and you can meet other parents there. I've also become a governor which is a very good way to find out what's going on at school!

icrave am so glad to hear that today's been better :)

[lazarusb]

)

[lazarusb]

elinor - don't worry about him not saying much, that's normal and will last through his entire school career!

icravecheese - glad to hear things have been better today and he didn't cry ALL day Nice to be missed though - ds2 has never given a monkeys! (Just started Y4 and I have been banned from the playground

[icravecheese]

well, just to update... good news at school pick-up, DS seems to have found himself a couple of girlfriends & they all stay together at break & lunch & he proudly told me that he didnt cry ALL day (well, apart from drop off this morning, but he's forgotten about that so I won't remind him!). He bounded out of school very happy, so i'm feeling much more positive this afternoon.
First week nearly over... phew - never realised how hard this would be!

[elinorbellowed]

Am I the only one racked with guilt because I have to work and PFB is being taken to school by his SAHD? I find it tricky because DP won't chat and socialise at the school gate like I would (not being a nosy get like me) so he hasn't found out any kids names or local gossip or anything useful! Feel a bit out of the loop with it.
I sobbed after I put him to bed on Monday night, but held it together when I left. He looked so small and solemn in his uniform. He has come back both days perfectly happy, but won't tell us a single word about the school, the teacher or the classroom. He has mentioned the lunch and that's it.

[lazarusb]

to you all. This parenthood lark is really hard work sometimes isn't it!

[spiderlight]

DS had his first morning today and loved it. I was gutted though - I've got a really nasty case of food poisoning so Daddy had to take him and pick him up. The first day at school is such a seminal mummy moment and I've missed it! Apparently he was absolutely fine, got to be the first in the line and trotted in without a backward glance.

[groovejet]

icrave, it will improve I promise.

I think that there is such a build up to going to reception that when the time comes it can all get a little too much. Kind of like christmas, the build up almost feeling sick on christmas eve but before you know it it's over kind of feeling, if that makes any sense at all. Makes sense in my head but not so much reading this it back!

Dos he have to have hot dinners, maybe do packed lunches as it tends to be easier to stay with a goup that way, at least until he has lunchtimes more sussed. Or have a word with the teacher, don't know how they do it at your school but when dd2 starts staying for lunch the teachers join them for the 1st week to make sure no-one has got lost.

[icravecheese]

thanks so much noisymonkiesmum, your post has made me feel better. I'm still feeling teary, its ridiculous - i'm 32 for gods sake!!! But I just feel so awful knowing that he is unhappy & feeling scared & vunerable at school. Its a lovely school, his teacher is so kind, so I know he is safe & they are looking out for him. I guess I'm just feeling surprised that he has reacted this way - he has been so excited about starting school, & he is usually so bubbly & sociable & funny, but unfortunately no-body is seeing that side of him at school at the mo...but hey-ho, i've got to put my cheery face on in 2hrs for collecting him, so i'd better pick myself up & get a grip. Hope your DD has a good day today....bribes are the way forward, I have promised DS an after school chocolate treat if he has a good day! THanks for your kind post.

[noisymonkiesmum]

I feel for you icravecheese, my dd was also 4 in April and seemed so happy and excited about starting school this week. Day 1 was fine, she walked in like she'd been there 100 times before, but day 2 she was peeled off me screaming like she was being dragged into a torture chamber, it was horrible. Day 3 was marginally better and this morning she was heavily bribed to be brave and went in with the teacher and even waved. Fingers crossed that this may continue but it makes my heart bleed when I see her looking so frail and scared. Keep it up though and don't feel bad for crying especially if you are pregnant, totally understandable! Keep smiling all :)

[noyouhavehadawee]

Todays our day - well this afternoon actually, half days for first 2 weeks then in there full time. I think we are ready. He has been practising riding his bike on 2 wheels this am so is feeling all big boy and happy. He is having his last 10 minutes of playing before we get dressed. We have had lots of cuddles this morning and i have just told him how these years are the best . Then my mum rang up and i felt a lump rising oh dear .....

[icravecheese]

Hi Ladies,
So sorry to hear you're all having a tough time at the start of term. I too am feeling teary today (so you don't have to go back & read thru the entire thread, my little chap is not settling in great at his first week at school). He has varied from going in fine (1st day), being dragged in by teacher (2nd day), having a fab day (3rd day) & back to tears this morning (4th day). He also tells me when I pick him up that he cries at school during the day, although he comes out fine & chirpy & doesnt seem affected by it at home.

He is straight into full days & its lunch time that he dreads....very noisy, gets separated from his class whilst queing for school dinner, then sits in playground on his own for rest of lunch because he can't find anyone he knows.

I am expecting my 3rd baby in 4 wks & the preg hormones are making it very difficult for me not to cry when he does... although I havent at all so far, it would be awful for him to see me cry, but as soon as I'm back in front door i'm sobbing! He was 4 in April, seemed so ready & excited to be starting school, was popular at nursery, has masses of friends, but is just so nervous of the new environment. After a good day yesterday (tears going in but no crying for rest of day & skipped out when I collected him) I really thought we'd cracked it & he'd be fine this morning. He was better than previous days, but still went in holding a teaching assistants hand & crying. I feel so helpless & just want to cuddle him!

Anyway, sorry for ramble, I know it'll get better in time, I just feel really down today because I can't bear to think of him unhappy. Hope everyone's week improves! x

[lazarusb]

Thank you. I am also preparing to start Uni on the 19th Sept so big changes to our life & general routine also happening at the moment. Hopefully today and tomorrow will settle her a bit more.

Happy - you make a good point, we do have a very happy life for the majority of the time! Perhaps that's why we feel the lows more keenly. When I was miserable with my ex and something went wrong it just felt like one more kick in the teeth and I just got on with it. Dd has never felt this before though, poor little thing!

Ginger - Dd was complaining of stomach ache today too. I think it's just stress really, getting used to new teachers, new BIG building, lots of people they don't know...hope your ds settles in soon too. 4 is very young to start school I agree.

[gingercurl]

Oh Lazar, the two of you seem to be having a really tough week. Hopefully, your dd gets settled in her new school and bus routine soon.

My DS (turned 4 last month) is doing his third day of school today and seems really quite apprehensive about it. He complains about tummy aches off and on, doesn't want to eat much, wakes up crying several times in the night and, after nearly a month of dry nights, is back to wetting again. He loved nursery, was there full-time since he was one and had loads of friends. He used to be all excited, happy and full of beans when I collected him up from there. Now he is withdrawn and grumpy when I pick him up after half a day in school. I know it's all new for him and that he will probably settle soon, but I feel so sorry for him. He seems confused and not sure of himself. Coming from a country where we don't start reception until age 6, I think 4 is way to young to start "big school".

[happybubblebrain]

Lazar - thanks. I intend to stay clear of her. She was walking through the school gates when she said it, in front of about 7 children and two other mums, who just smirked. So maybe it is a bit more typical of this school than others. I feel very uncomfortable anyway.

Sorry you are having a difficult week. It is so sad when a pet dies. I don't know why these things all seem to happen at once, but at least that way you can have long periods of peace and happiness sometimes. I hope you feel better soon.

[lazarusb]

happyburblebrain Steer clear of this woman for a start Was she in the playground, talking to her dc, other children or adults? I would mention it to the school so at least they are aware & can monitor her behaviour a bit. I don't blame you for feeling uncomfortable about it, especially as your dd heard it, but rest assured that kind of behaviour is not typical of most parents.

My dd started secondary on Tuesday. She got the bus for the first time yesterday and was very nervous about it. She was in tears this am which is just not her at all. It's been a rough week - I had a minor car accident on Tuesday which turned nasty and I had to contact the Police and her much loved hamster died on Tuesday night too I'm sure we'll look back and laugh but even I am feeling blubby at the moment and that isn't me either! She's not even my pfb! I've done all this before and come the other side!

Any words of comfort much appreciated!

[happybubblebrain]

My daughter hasn't settled in yet and she's saying she doesn't want to go and to be honest I don't really blame her. This morning I heard one of the mums at the school gates using extremely threatening and offensive language in front of a large group of kids, my daughter obviously heard it too. I just don't want her to be around this kind of thing. Any ideas what I should do?

[bugster]

Simic, that set up sounds really strange - why does she have to stay in the aftrnoons if tnere are no lessons? My dd has also recently started school in Switzerland and there are only a few hours of lessons a day and when there aren't lessons they come home - including every lunchtime. What country are you in?

[Simic]

My dd has just started school on the continent - she´s nearly six so we don´t have so much the worries about her being so small - but she HAS to go from 8am until 4pm. That´s a working day. I never get to see her any more and really miss her.
It´s not that she has time with her teachers all that time - lessons only go until lunchtime most days and then in the afternoons they get penned up in a horrible room (I´ve looked - it´s in such a bad state it´s appalling) with too few staff (not teaching staff) trying to stop the chaos. For hours on end. Dd says that there are three classes in this room and there is neither enough space for them all or enough toys/things to do. She just sits on a sofa because there´s nothing else to do. The problem is there are other schools where we could pick them up at 1.30 but now dd (after two and a half weeks of school) is so besotted with her teachers - and they are really fantastic. I don´t have the heart to now start a big pfb parent act and try to move her to a different school.
I knew the hours would be so long before she started - but the class sizes are tiny for the lessons (even though it is a state school) and I really loved the teacher too! It´s our local school and it seemed like a good idea at the time. It´s only now that I´ve seen what goes on in the afternoons that I think I can´t leave her there. Aargghh. Sorry, I´m only posting to vent! I am wondering about starting to abduct her from school at 3pm - being understaffed they probably wouldn´t notice!

[twotesttickles]

Mine both started today. They loved it. Came out knackered but very happy and v excited about going back tomorrow.

[pot39]

I'm an imposter, wondering how it happened that it feels like yesterday that ours started school.
Enjoy, because in a blink they'll be going to secondary school ( as my baby boy did yesterday) and to Mrs Kitty, NO they won't be doing it at 15.

What I would say tho' is that you have any concerns then you MUST get the school involved, don't sweat it out with other parents, it's the school who can really help.

[squeezedatbothends]

Left mine sobbing for the second day running - off to pick up now. Hopefully better tomorrow :(

[OhForASilentNight]

DD1 started on Monday. Couldn't be happier... ran into the first classroom we came to and I had to go haul her out and take her over to her own class! Absolutely no concerns for her but worried about DD2 who wandered around the house the last two mornings looking for her big sister and when finally reunited flung her arms around her and wouldn't let go. Other concern is that I'm likely to lose my job before DD1 starts proper full time hours - one week of mornings, one week of afternoons, another week of mornings, two weeks of afternoons then two weeks of Monday/Wednesday/Friday. Then half term. I can see she needs it though - was fast asleep yesterday by 5pm after her second 3 hour morning!

[groovejet]

First morning for dd2 she was so excited this morning, never seen her get dressed so quickly!

She went in fine and sems happy enough, she did say a boy and girl wouldn't let her play but she said she just played with another girl instead. Which is good as usually she would have a strop over something like that so she ha listened to my advise if somethin like that happens.

Wish some of you mums with smaller children are at our school, dd2 is petite and that is all some of the other parents & teachers for that matter kept saying, feel like apologising for mine and DH's inability to produce tall children.