This may sound stupid but....

[Babyblues14]

I'm terrified at the thought of giving birth to the point where I panic when I think about it. Does everyone get this?? Baby was planned and im very excited about being a mum. Obviously I knew at some point I would have to give birth but I didnt put much thought into it until I got pregnant. Im 2 months pregnant, will it get worse over time? Or will I calm down soon? Also it doesnt help with family telling me how painful it is, im 22 and this is my first baby.
Thanks in advance xx

[Mrs40]

I'm feeling worried too and I'm almost 39 weeks. I think I had buried my head in the sand before now and as it's imminent I keep wondering about what will happen. I think its because there are so many variables that we have no control over. Will baby be breach, will I go naturally, will I need a section, etc etc?? It's difficult to plan how you will cope as each birth is so different.

All I would say is that if you feel anything like me by the time you get near the end you are just to desperate to meet the baby that the fear does reduce. I'm still worried but not nearly as much as I was earlier on as I just keep thinking of having our baby in my arms.

Also to a lesser degree I have been getting fed up of being pregnant and wishing for some of these symptoms to be over.

I agree with other posters that folk love telling you the horror stories and some people almost want to have had the worst time as if it makes them a better mother or something. I've tried hard not to listen!

[mistermagpie]

Don't be scared. I'm pregnant with my second and can assure you that if it was that bad I wouldn't be doing it again. Yes it hurts, but that's not really a surprise, and it's a different kind of pain to say, a broken leg, because one the baby is born it immediately stops. I had a very quick, intense labour and it was agony with no breaks in contractions, I would do it again every day for the rest of my life if I had to to have my son. You will be fine and I promise it's worth it,

[spacepoodle]

I was terrified; not because of the pain but because I could not imagine and did not want a baby coming out of my vagina. I know birth is a natural process and therefore my fear would be considered irrational by many but it was (and still is) a very real one. It got to the point where I wasn't sleeping and couldn't focus on anything else. People saying things like "lots of women do it" or "it's not that bad" made me feel even worse.

Please speak to your midwife as soon as possible. I was passed between various midwives, mental health teams and consultants until at 37 weeks when I pushed for an elective c-section. We agreed that if I went into labour before my c-section (at 39 weeks) then I would see how anxious I felt at the time. We also agreed on two very detailed birth plans (one for ELCS and one for vaginal birth) that made me feel like I had more control over what would happen. As it turns out I had a condition that was discovered a week later and had to have an ELCS anyway!

It would have saved me a lot of anxiety if I'd pushed for support early in my pregnancy. There are midwives and psychologists who can talk through your options with you - don't feel silly for being anxious.

[TheRumTumTugger]

When you're actually in labour and going through it, it's like your brain disengages and your body takes over.

I had a very long labour and a very medicalised birth but at no point did I feel like I couldn't handle it. I juat sort of surrendered and trusted my body to do what it needed to. And then when my body wasn't going what it was supposed to do (ie, squeeze a stuck monster baby through my childlike pelvis), I surrendered to the midwives and doctors and just let them sort it out!

Honestly, it won't be as bad as your fears.

[MamaHanji]

I was absolutely petrified of giving birth. It gave me panic attacks and made me feel sick just thinking about it. So much so that with my first, I had an elective caesarean as my anxiety (not just about birth) was really bad. Second time I really really wanted a natural labour and to avoid a caesarean as much as possible! I was terrified as well! But thankfully I had my natural labour. And yes it is very painful. But omg as soon as you hold your baby for the first time, you'd do it again 1000 times over.

Try and stay calm and read as much information as you can and speak to your midwives/consultant/partner/mother, everyone! I coped by having my mother and partner aware of how terrified I was and they were there completely for my emotional needs. Support during labour was the most important thing for me while I waiting for my epidural. Which never came as I dilated to quickly and then the baby practically fell out!

Also this book

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B00AWPZUVC/ref=mpssa113aa_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1486826075&sr=8-3&keywords=hypnobirthing+book&dpPl=1&dpID=518G%2BSo26ML&ref=plSrch


Stay calm, it's worth it. And don't suffer In silence. Talk about your fears

Xx

[LondonRoo]

I gave birth to our little daughter 2 weeks ago. Started off in the birthing pool but ended up in the delivery suite on syntocin to help things progress. Not the easiest birth ever but not overly difficult either. Honestly, it was absolutely fine and really exciting as baby got closer and closer to coming. 100% worth it.

What are you scared of? I used gas & air and the pain was manageable. I just relaxed and let it happen using lots of deep breathing I learned through yoga. I tried to see the pain as productive - I knew what it was, it wasn't something to fear or fight - it was just the sensations of baby coming.

The most beautiful sound I've ever heard in my life was my newborn's cry as she arrived and nothing can describe the feeling of holding her warm little body for the first time (even with the wee and poo she promptly did all over me!)

Might be worth looking into Hypnobirthing or something similar to help with the fear. Also... Ask people for positive birth stories - I don't know anyone who says they wish they'd never gone through labour however much people feel the need to tell you how awful it is.

Roo